You are what you eat…or what eats you.
Retired cop Earl Bedford is living the good life with his wife, Jalina, getting fat and rich robbing banks. But after their last job goes south, they hang up their masks. Unfortunately, a terrorist group calling itself the Right Hand of God has contaminated food supplies all over the country with something resembling rabies. Now, Earl and Jalina have to deal with the crazy federal agent on their tail (T.S.N. – don’t ask him what it stands for. That makes him mad.) and it’s the end of the world, apparently. But Earl just wants to go someplace warm, not battle his zombie-fied neighbors.
A cop stood with his gun drawn, grinning down at me as I staggered to my feet.
"That's the thing about reckless driving," he said. "Somebody shoots out one of your tires when you're going that fast, and that's all she wrote." He paused. "Now kindly get 'em up."
My heart was trying to climb out of my throat until he spoke, then my breathing slowed and I felt calm wash over me. I raised my hands slowly.
"Forty seven banks," the cop continued. "That's how many you robbed, ain't it? And I got you."
"Your lucky day," I said.
"Oh, I got lucky. The Black Ghost, that's what they call you in the papers. You're like the James Gang, or something. You're supposed to be the best." The cop spit. "More like the Bad News Bears."
"Ain't the best," I said. "Or you wouldn't know how many I hit."
The cop nodded.
"You changed it up, didn't you?" I asked, trying to keep him talking. "Broke routine."
The cop nodded again. "We figured you might hit this area, so we set up a little surprise for you. Started varying our patrols, keeping an eye on the branches. I knew you were going to hit this one. I knew it in my bones."
"That was smart," I said. There was a noise behind me, and the cop's eyes twitched to the upside down heap. That's when I hit him with a shoulder to the chest, knocking him back against the car. He didn't drop the gun, though, and I grappled with him to get it for a long moment. The bruises in my side screamed at me to stop, but I ignored that and kept pushing until my feet came out from under me and I slipped on the gravel with a sickening lurch. The cop flipped me and slammed me to the ground. He aimed the gun at me and there was a shot.