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kayelle_allen
June 8th, 2007, 08:47 PM
One of the most helpful classes that I ever took was on values and goals. I'm going to provide a list of values for you to read over, and then give you a short task to complete. This will help you determine what you truly value, which can be a great way to determine your personal goals.

VALUE LIST
Achievement (contribution to society)
Authority (total order, confidence in leadership)
Beauty (appreciation of nice things)
Belonging (being accepted by others, not isolated)
Comfort (ease, pleasure, relaxation)
Environment (appreciation of nature)
Equality ( opportunity for everyone)
Eternal Life (Heaven, life after death)
Excitement (adventure, travel, interest)
Family (security, care, closeness)
Freedom (power to do what you want to do)
Friendship (trust, companionship)
Glamour (attractive lifestyle, excitement, not mundane)
Happiness (satisfaction, joy, contentment)
Intelligence (ability to understand)
Justice (fairness, honesty)
Learning and growing as a person
Love (closeness, intimacy, self-giving)
Peace (freedom from war and personal conflict)
Peace of Mind (freedom from inner conflict)
Pleasure ( enjoyment, comfort)
Popularity (being liked, respected)
Power (able to make changes, influence, control)
Security (personal and national protection)
Self Respect (pride, confidence In yourself)
Self-Determination (power to control own life)
Service (giving/doing to others)
Social Recognition (respect, admiration, fame, status)
Stability (lack of sudden unexpected changes)
Wealth (material comfort and security)

===========
Now that you've read through this list of values, take a moment to write down the ten (10) that you feel are the most important in your life. When finished, you don't have to post them here, just tell me how it made you feel to leave out the other twenty (20).

Later, I'll post the second half of this exercise, which is guaranteed to surprise you! Are you ready? Go!

===========
Value list from Careersonline.com
http://www.careersonline.com.au/disc/values.html

HH Self
June 8th, 2007, 11:00 PM
An intriguing exercise so far, I am curious to see where this leads. I went through quickly, not easily, and picked the 10 that jumped out. Actually some of what was left behind I have learned to live without and could continue to do so. A couple I really didnít care that much about being left behind. But there were six within the twenty that I doubt in reality I could surrender.
So now I sit trying to imagine what comes next.
WWW.hhself.NET (http://WWW.hhSELF.NET)

HeartFelt Promos
June 9th, 2007, 01:09 AM
Hi kayelle
Thank you so much for sharing these wonderful ideas
I have pick my ten.

kayelle_allen
June 9th, 2007, 07:00 AM
It's good to see some brave souls. :) It's not quite 7am here and I am on early for a Saturday. I'll check back in a bit to see who else has posted. The next part of this is effective only for those who do the first part, so hang tight, friends!

I'll check this again mid-morning.

rgraham666
June 9th, 2007, 07:57 AM
I picked mine. I don't mind posting them.

Beauty
Equality
Freedom
Intelligence
Justice
Love
Peace of Mind
Security
Self Respect
Self-Determination

Most important to me are those that allow me a sense of personal identity.

From my point of view, the world we live in, even here in North America where our myths are freedom and individuality, demands a lot of conformity. Not because that conformity accomplishes much, but because conformity makes things easy. You don't have to do as much thinking when there's little to think about.

I've never been able to conform. I tried hard to, our economics demands it. If you want to eat, you have to fit in. I never succeeded and I got very tired trying to do it.

So the things I value are the things that allow me to be myself.

kuroisama
June 9th, 2007, 09:07 AM
I don't mind posting my list either.

achievement
belonging
comfort
friendship
intelligence
peace of mind
security
self respect
self determination
stability

I figure, with those ten, the others will sort themselves out over time. :)

Jude Mason
June 9th, 2007, 09:44 AM
This was a real toughie. I got down to 16 and then it really hurt. Wow. I can hardly wait to see where this is going.

Jude

Karenne
June 9th, 2007, 12:52 PM
Now that you've read through this list of values, take a moment to write down the ten (10) that you feel are the most important in your life.

Okay here are my 10! It was hard narrowing it down to 10

Equality ( opportunity for everyone)
Family (security, care, closeness)
Freedom (power to do what you want to do)
Happiness (satisfaction, joy, contentment)
Intelligence (ability to understand)
Learning and growing as a person
Love (closeness, intimacy, self-giving)
Peace of Mind (freedom from inner conflict)
Self Respect (pride, confidence In yourself)
Stability (lack of sudden unexpected changes)



When finished, you don't have to post them here, just tell me how it made you feel to leave out the other twenty (20).



It was really hard to choose the most important ones because several of them applied to me and what I want. So ...it was a process of elimination on what was more important.:yes:

torrentwaters
June 9th, 2007, 12:53 PM
Several where a lot harder to let go of than others.

kayelle_allen
June 9th, 2007, 08:20 PM
I'm impressed with your lists. Trust me, I know it's hard. Now for the surprising part.

If you have a purse, grab it and dump out the things inside. (yes, there is a purpose :err: to all this)

If you only have a wallet, or a bookbag you carry, empty that.

Now, assign every item in there one of the values in the overall list. For example;

ticket stub to concert - Friendship (went with a friend)
lipstick - Beauty
receipt - Wealth
photo of kids - Family

Get the idea?

Ok. List every item and assign it a value. What that value is will be totally your call - your judgment. A receipt may be wealth related if it's a bank slip, but pleasure if it's a restaurant. Again, that's your call depending on how you view it.

This will take you a few minutes to do but is totally eye-opening.

Next step - How to interpret what these items tell you about your values!

kayelle_allen
June 9th, 2007, 11:13 PM
Ok, have you done your homework yet? I hope so, because this is where you will truly find out what your values are.

Take the two lists, one of the values you held most dear, and the other of what things you have that represent values to you and compare them. Write down how many of each value you have. For example;

List 1 (Important values)
Achievement
Authority
Beauty
Belonging


List 2 (Items representing values)
Wealth 6 (receipts)
Friendship 3 (notecards from friends)
Security 2 (set of keys, remote to garage door)

====
Consider this:

What does the difference in the two lists tell me about my values?
What does the amount of items for each value tell me about my values? (am I out of balance on anything?)
Is my energy going to what I felt was most important?
What can I change that will enable me to focus my energy toward my true values/goals?
What was the overriding reason I actually put those items in my purse/wallet in the first place? A sense of order? No time to put them where they should go? Do I feel I *must* have them with me? Why?

These are not easy questions. If you take time to answer them honestly, you will learn more about yourself than you perhaps wanted to know.

Bottom line, you will see your values in a new light, and take them less for granted. As you align your values/goals/life in a cohesive purpose, may you find great peace, joy, and success.

HH Self
June 10th, 2007, 12:31 PM
I'm impressed with your lists. Trust me, I know it's hard. Now for the surprising part.

If you have a purse, grab it and dump out the things inside. (yes, there is a purpose :err: to all this)

If you only have a wallet, or a bookbag you carry, empty that.

Now, assign every item in there one of the values in the overall list. For example;

ticket stub to concert - Friendship (went with a friend)
lipstick - Beauty
receipt - Wealth
photo of kids - Family

Get the idea?

Ok. List every item and assign it a value. What that value is will be totally your call - your judgment. A receipt may be wealth related if it's a bank slip, but pleasure if it's a restaurant. Again, that's your call depending on how you view it.

This will take you a few minutes to do but is totally eye-opening.

Next step - How to interpret what these items tell you about your values!
I have a book bag I keep close by in it was found
<o></o>
Four paperbacks
*The elements of Style ~Intelligence (ability to understand)
*Gotham Writer Workshop ~Learning and growing as a person
*Summer Heat 2 ~ Social Recognition (respect, admiration, fame, status) I have a story in here along with some other excellent authors.
*Sailing the Astral Tides ~ Social Recognition (respect, admiration, fame, status) I did the cover for this novel so I show it off.
*Mammoth book of Erotica ~ Pleasure ( enjoyment, comfort)
* My digital book reader with about 50 works from friends in the business. ~<st1>Friendship</st1> (trust, companionship)
*2 composition note books, one for journal and one for observations. ~ Peace of Mind (freedom from inner conflict)
*A print out of an upcoming story Sex on the Beach ~Happiness (satisfaction, joy, contentment)
*3 colored pens one red, one blue, one black ~~Learning and growing as a person
*Money clip ~ Freedom (power to do what you want to do)
*Motherís insurance and Id card ~ Family (security, care, closeness) She has Alzheimer so I take care of things for her.
*My insurance and ID/DL card ~ Self-Determination (power to control own life)
*Three credit cards ~ Wealth (material comfort and security)
* Nail clipper ~ Self Respect (pride, confidence In yourself)
* Pocket knife ~ Self-Determination (power to control own life)
*Multi tool ~ Security (personal and national protection)
*Pager from the FD ~ Service (giving/doing to others)
*Cell Phone ~ Family (security, care, closeness)
*Digital camera ~ Beauty (appreciation of nice things)
*MP3 ~ Beauty (appreciation of nice things)
*Family Pics ~ Family (security, care, closeness)
*GPS ~ Excitement (adventure, travel, interest)
* bottle of water ~Comfort (ease, pleasure, relaxation)
*1 candy bar ~ Pleasure ( enjoyment, comfort)
*breath mints ~ Love (closeness, intimacy, self-giving)
*chapstick ~ Self Respect (pride, confidence In yourself)
*CPR mask ~ Achievement (contribution to society)
*Folding rescue tool ~ Power (able to make changes, influence, control)
* Sunglasses ~Glamour (attractive lifestyle, excitement, not mundane) hey they were expensive ;)

Karenne
June 10th, 2007, 12:59 PM
snicker..you have to be strong to carry all of that! I am impressed.

I am so NOT gonna tell ya'll what is in my purse...but I am still doing the exercise. Just don't want to be embarrased!:errrr:

HH Self
June 10th, 2007, 03:37 PM
There might be a couple of things I felt best left out of my list.:redface: A few thing on the list are on my belt or in my pockets but I thought it all fell into the personal things we keep around us category. And then too you have to remember I make a good part of my living working in very hot places with 50-60 lbs of gear on. The book/writing bag is a walk in the park after that.

It was interesting to go back and match up lists. I am enjoying the workshop.

torrentwaters
June 10th, 2007, 05:28 PM
I found I have less things in my purse than I had values, so what does that say about me. But the excerise was interesting.

deniserossetti
June 10th, 2007, 10:37 PM
OK, list done - it wasn't that hard for me. There were only a couple I had to really think about.

Now what?

Denise

Sascha_Illyvich
June 11th, 2007, 05:16 PM
No surprise here:

Authority
Belonging
Comfort
Excitement
Family
Love
Power
Self Determination
Wealth
Stability

Sascha_Illyvich
June 11th, 2007, 05:23 PM
My wallet's at home but...

Temp Driver's license: Status
Three credit cards, a bank card: Wealth
keys to investment property in Dallas: Wealth
Ticket stub from movie saw with best friend years back: Family
FedEx Reciept: Wealth
Pictures of GF, Mistress, Mistress's kids, Best friend's daughter: Family
SS card: Status
Old Texas Driver's license: Status
Title person's business card: Friendship
Spec's discount liquor key: booze? *snicker* Pleasure

Sascha_Illyvich
June 11th, 2007, 05:41 PM
You know, as real estate investors we talk about htis a LOT actually. The guys who play big have goals and values that are aligned with how they invest and it's interesting to see how both my worlds come together.

Btw, I'm lacking balance in both. Surprise there too? Not likely. But this is great insight and "I" can see the value add relevant to a writer's life.

Auburnimp
June 11th, 2007, 08:13 PM
My values list reads

Comfort
Equality
Excitement
Family
Freedom
Friendship
Happiness
Intelligence
Pleasure
Stability

I didn't feel any huge sense of loss over those I didn't pick.

On turning out my purse I found

10 ticket stubs - Excitement and Friendship and Happiness
6 Photos - Family and Friendship and Happiness
1 Notebook and 4 pens - Intelligence
Debit Card and cash - Stability
1 Stress Ball - Pleasure
1 Sun block - Comfort

I found this really interesting especially as my values appear to be borne out by the content of my purse!

Auburnimp
Hot with a Plot
www.auburnimp.net

kayelle_allen
June 11th, 2007, 09:28 PM
OK, list done - it wasn't that hard for me. There were only a couple I had to really think about.

Now what?

Denise

Read thru the posts - the next part of the lesson is posted there. :) Have fun, Denise...

Karenne
June 11th, 2007, 09:49 PM
This is fun Kayelle! You are an awesome teacher. I don't remember having this much fun in college:smartass:

kayelle_allen
June 11th, 2007, 10:04 PM
This is fun Kayelle! You are an awesome teacher. I don't remember having this much fun in college:smartass:

You should have sat next to me, then! :rockon:

Karenne
June 11th, 2007, 10:29 PM
But then I wouldn't have learned anything!:nerd:

snicker

kayelle_allen
June 12th, 2007, 07:37 PM
But then I wouldn't have learned anything!:nerd:

snicker


LOL - you're right... :dots: