View Full Version : Irina V. Sophenar Reports

September 17th, 2007, 10:02 AM
This report was discovered fifty years after it had been buried in a long forgotten archive within the GWENN studio records department. Ms Sophenar, who vanished on the Orminus Pleasure planet five years ago, had sealed the file against opening. Our encryption experts took three months unlocking the file., we hope you enjoy the fruits of all their efforts. Now, to the lost Sophenar file...

Location: The Anamer Gas Mining and Refinery Corporation
Stardate: 5-17-2823

Hello everyone. I'm Irina V. Sophenar, your reporter from GWENN -- The Galaxy-Wide Erotic Newsvid Network -- talking to you today from The Anamer Gas Mining and Refinery Corporation. Most of you know it as the Poseidon VII colony; an amazing company run by the simply delicious Anis Anamer, Poseidon’s silver-haired mega-billionaire bombshell CEO.

Things have heated up on Poseidon VII with the arrival of the Pangalactic Bodyguard Bureau's team led by the scrumptious Simon Delamer. President Anamer's announcement of an imminent invasion by Separatists forces hasn't calmed things down either. The colony is hopping as emergency contingency plans are implemented.

By a stroke of luck, and some ingenious research, we have tracked down Simon Delamer of the P.B.B. to the Radiation Grill and Bar in Alpha Quad (two Khalhda on the rocks please!) where he's taking a quick break between hunting Separatist spies.

Often compared to a Greek god in the flesh—Simon is the prime contact for the team responsible for the Anamer family's safety. We're here to find out what he knows about the recent assassination attempts against Anis Anamer, and just how he manages to work with such a sexy woman.

Irina: (Glancing approvingly at Simon's well-developed muscles) Simon, what's it like being the bodyguard for Poseidon VII's number one Diva?

Simon: Diva? Not at all! Ms. Anamer is one of the most caring employers I've known. The way she works tirelessly for her company is legendary in this sector of the galaxy. It's a pleasure to work for her.

Irina: Oh, a pleasure? Really? Not to mention, of course, that Anis is a very beautiful woman.

Simon: (Looks at Irina suspiciously) Hmm? I assure you, Ms. Sophenar, that P.B.B. Agents are very dedicated to their work. And trained to be discreet.

Irina: Discreet enough not to admit you've been in Anis's bedroom?

Simon: Why do you think I've been in her bedroom?

Irina: Well, the rumors are that that you foiled an assassination attempt in Anis' bedroom.

Simon: Ah, the booby-trapped air supplier. Yes, I was fortunate enough to be there when the Vadarian assassin bot struck. I have to stress that Ms. Anamer was appropriately dressed at all times. It was also suggested after the attempt that Ms. Anamer needed protection at all times.

Irina: Is that why you took a bath with her?

Simon: (Takes his gun out of his holster and checks the ammunition clip.) <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:City w:st="on">Bath</st1:City>?

Irina: (Nervously) Well, you said you were protecting Anis at all times . . .

Simon: You may rest assured, Ms. Sophenar, that I’ve never taken a bath with Ms. Anamer.

Irina: (Feeling a little bolder) So you were never tempted by that smooth ivory skin with the soap bubbles sliding away slowly to reveal—

Simon: **CLICK!** (Snaps ammunition clip back into gun, cocks gun and accidentally points it in Irina's direction. Looks down the gunsight at her.)

Irina: (Feeling very nervous.) That means no, I guess.

Simon: Hmmm? (Goes back to inspecting the gun more casually.)

Irina: (Trying to be brave) Interesting reaction, in spite of Anis's bodacious ta-tas and that, um, rather impressive lump in the front of your pants. How is Anis taking this whole invasion thingy? I hear the Separatists are Sadie's Hell on women. Why didn't she evacuate with the rest of the Anamer's?

Simon: Anis cares for her people and about what happens to them. I'm sure she intends to fight to keep Poseidon VII free. I believe leaving the colony would seem to her that she was abandoning them.

Irina: (Cooing.) Is she concerned about becoming one of the Separatist’s amazing sex slaves?

Simon: I'm here. (Polishes gun) They'll never get her.

Irina: (Eyeing Simon's pants.) I imagine no Separatist would come near you with a weapon like that. (Licks her lips) Though I wouldn't mind a closer look at it myself.

Simon: (Putting gun back in holster.) For 3,000 galactic dollars a day you can hire a P.B.B. Agent.

Irina: (Swallowing.) That much! That's a little too pricey for me.

Simon: Well if you want the best you have to pay for the best. (Grinning) Of course if you want cheaper then a level two agent like Agent Robbin is only 2,000 dollars a day.

Irina: But he doesn't come, uhm, as well equipped as you do.

Simon: I'd have no idea about that. (Comset beeping.) Excuse me a second. Hello, Roger Twenty-three Marco Prime. Yes? The Sophenar security clearance checks? I can shoot her?

Irina: (Suddenly terrified) What!

Simon: She's cleared? I can't shoot her? (Sounding disappointed.) Okay, I'll fix the waiver. Roger Twenty-three Marco Prime out. (Puts comset away.)

Irina: (Worried.) What was that about?

Simon: (Sounding rueful.) Unfortunately your security clearance checks out. I'm not allowed to shoot you.

Irina: (Takes a sip of Kalhda to calm her nerves.) Thank God!

Anis: (Arriving at the bar and slipping into the booth beside Simon, Anis orders a RockShooter cocktail.) I don't know, attempting to seduce an employee of the Company. That's a shootable offense, I think (Anis smiles at Simon. Simon grins back.)

Irina: (Panicking.) Uh, now, hold on a sec!

Simon: (Taking Irina's <st1:PlaceName w:st="on">Identity</st1:PlaceName> <st1:PlaceType w:st="on">Pass</st1:PlaceType> and sliding it into his workpad.) Of course, you can take this waiver, lose this interview, and go on your way.

Irina: (Carefully taking <st1:PlaceName w:st="on">Identity</st1:PlaceName> <st1:PlaceType w:st="on">Pass</st1:PlaceType> back.) Really lose the interview?

Anis and Simon together: Yes!

Irina: (Stepping carefully away from the booth.) Well, it was very pleasant chatting to you; I'm afraid I have an interview with a male stripper coming up in the Beta Quad and I have to dash.

Simon: (Anis and Simon only have eyes for each other.) I think it’s time for us to go undercover.

Anis: Oh yes, under the covers sounds good!

Irina: (Backing out of door, and tripping over the cameraman.) “Uhm, bye, for now.”


Well that's it for the interview ladies and gentlemen, all I can say is, man, those two are hot and they really need to get a room. I'm certainly going to be keeping an eye on them.

This is Irina V. Sophenar, your intrepid reporter, signing off for GWENN—here's wishing you an interesting night.<O:p</O:p