View Full Version : Romantic Comedy Exotica

HeartFelt Promos
April 17th, 2006, 11:55 PM
Author's please post your excerpt with a website for readers!

April 22nd, 2006, 11:52 PM
Excerpt from He Came From Venus by Ella Scopilo
Available at http://www.chippewapublishing.com

This excerpt has adult content. Please close if you are under 18. Thank you.

Durgen took the clothes Catherine pulled from the big black box in the closet
and placed them on the chair. Showing no modesty at all, he stripped right there in
front of her.
She studied his tanned broad shoulders and muscular arms. She sighed as her
eyes danced around from his smooth chest to his rippled stomach. She even
giggled when she noticed the stiff rod pointing straight at her. Good lord, that
handy tool must have been at least a good eleven inches! Her giggling stopped
when she stared at the small spot above his lovely cock.
She rubbed her eyes with the heels of her palms and looked again. It just
couldn’t be! Did he have a tattoo of a mouth above his shaft? She squeezed her
eyelids shut until they watered and looked again. This time it smiled at her. She
jumped back as the tongue darted out from the lips that were almost identical to the
pair on Durgen’s face. The tongue licked the smooth lips and moved back into its
“What’s wrong?” he asked from the mouth above his chin.
“What is,” she forgot her mother told her it was rude to point and stabbed a
finger toward the second mouth, “that?”
“Don’t you have a secondary consumption system?” He cocked his head to the
side while pulling at the top of her skirt with his fingers.
“Uh, no. See?” She wiggled out of her cotton shorts and silk panties. His smile
widened as the fabric uncovered the small patch of hair between her thighs.

April 23rd, 2006, 11:16 PM
Is that it or do we get to read more? :P Is there anyway that I could purchase your book? It sounds great and I am amazed that just this paragraph has me hooked. :o

April 24th, 2006, 12:38 AM
Hi Aislinn!
Thank you for the kind words :-) Durgen's story can be continued at


Durgen has a sexy torso and an interesting asset ;-)


April 24th, 2006, 12:42 AM
Hi Ella, those are not kind words ~ they are the truth girl! And thanks for letting me know where to get it.

September 4th, 2006, 02:34 AM
This book doesn't really qualify as exotica or erotica, but it is a romance and it is a comedy. Since this is the exotic section of the forum, I searched for an excerpt that fit. This comes from my final edits version, not the PDF one, as it hates me and will not comply with my wishes, however, I've checked and rechecked and they are basically the same, but the margins are friendlier in the Microsoft Word one. I hope you enjoy. :)
From Braless in the Buick available at Coffee Time Romance's Bookstore

“Jake?” Her voice was low and husky, drawing him back to the present. He looked at her, finally noticing her attire. She wore another pair of those sleep pants and another tank. When in the hell did that replace a lace teddy as the sexiest lingerie he could imagine? She wore those silly bunny slippers too. His lips quirked remembering the first time he'd seen them. It had only been two days; that was all it took, apparently.

“Yeah, babe?” He went and made some tea, offering her a cup. She took it, using it to warm her hands. She looked down into the cup as if she were trying to read the leaves. Her next words floored him.

“Make love to me?” She was trembling. He wondered if it was from fear or desire.

“Are you sure?” Was he losing his damn mind? The woman of his dreams was standing here baldly asking him to be with her. And he knew what it meant, he could see it in her eyes.

“Yes.” She turned and walked out of the room without waiting to see if he followed her or not.

He stood there alone in the kitchen, weighing the pros and cons of the situation. On one hand, he was undercover; this constituted, if not a breaking of the rules, then at least the bending of them. On the other, this was Allie, the woman he'd been lusting after since he'd seen pictures of her at the beginning of this investigation.

It was damned if he did and damned if he didn't. And if he was damned, he wanted a taste of heaven first. This night would make up for the lonely nights to follow. With that thought, he hurried into the room.

Jake opened his mouth, but his thoughts flew straight out of his head. She'd pulled the tank over her head and let it fall to the floor; more importantly, the pants followed it.

Her breasts were full and soft, her waist was narrow, flaring out to a pair of sweetly rounded hips and a set of legs he was sure were made to be wrapped around him. He felt all the blood in his body head south and grunted.

The moonlight drifted in through the window and fell on her dark hair. The sable curls fell down to the middle of her back. She looked like a goddess, delectable, soft, and alluring.

“Allie.” He stripped his clothes off and waited. Her stare moved over him like a caress. She glided to a stop in front of him. Her eyes looked dark and mysterious in the dimness of the room, less like a mother and more like a seductress.

She didn't speak, just wrapped her arms around his waist. Her skin smelled of wildflowers, and her hair was cool and silky on his chest.

This was it, this felt right, just this. Nothing else would have to happen and he'd be happy. Well, okay, his libido disagreed, but he could ignore it. His muscles jumped beneath her touch, quivering. He groaned when her hand slipped lower to stroke him. He was an adult. Yeah, right.

“Lie down,” he whispered, “on your stomach.” When she gave him a puzzled look, he nudged her toward the bed.

She did as he asked, but he caught her hesitation. She tensed up as he sat beside her, but when his hands slid up her back she sighed. He saw the tiny smile on her face and leaned down to kiss her.

He gently rubbed the muscles of her neck, and she moaned. With a grin he kept massaging her neck, then he moved down to her shoulder blades and spine. With each stroke he felt her body relax. She said his name in a reverent whisper when he pressed harder right in the small of her back.

“If you keep that up, you will be chained to this bed, forever.” She told him.

“And that would be bad, how?” He teased.

“I don't know right now, but I'm sure I can come up with something later on.” She hissed in a breath when his fingers moved to her thighs. When he hit her feet, she melted into a puddle.


Jake had forever replaced Nikko in her foot massaging fantasies. She opened her eyes when he moved to find him lying beside her with his head propped on his hand, smiling. “What are you staring at?” She immediately reached for the sheet. While he'd been doing the toe sex thing, she'd forgotten she was naked, but now, she was a little shy.

“You.” His simple answer held a wealth of meaning. He caressed her cheek with the tips of his fingers and she kissed his palm before he could move it away. He leaned over and pressed his lips right below her ear, laughing when she shivered.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed the length of her body along his. Her legs shifted restlessly against his own. His body was warm and hard; the muscles in his back rippled in response to her touch.

He kissed her eyelids, her nose, and finally her mouth. A slow, exploratory kiss that left her breathless and shaking. His hands cupped her breasts, and his thumbs caressed the stiffening peaks to painful hardness.

Allie closed her eyes. With every stroke of his hands, she burned hotter. He moved slowly down her body each little nibble or lick making her arch against him with a soft cry.

He touched her, moving his fingers inside with slow, liquid strokes, his tongue swirling against her. She ached; her body felt full and heavy. She twisted her fingers in his hair, pulling him to her. The sensations swamped her, spiraling tighter and tighter until she screamed her release.

** I'll stop there..

September 4th, 2006, 09:00 AM
Hi everybody, my name my new short erotica
COMPUTER GAMES is now at Lady Aibell Press.


Daria has a secret lover with dark secret of his own that she can
never reveal, except to a fanatical few on-line who would love to
believe the fun-loving chat room joker was telling the truth.


"Ha ha, very funny. Tell them you'll be back later." He smiled, and
pinched through the cotton. He watched as she wiggled, laughing,
squirming, trying to ignore the impossible-to ignore fingers that
worked their way around her breasts. "Tell them, or I'll have to
throw you over the desktop and do you while you type." He pushed her
forward until she was on her feet and he threw back her chair, which
glided on its casters halfway across the room.

Standing behind her, he caressed her back as she continued to type;
now it was a competition to see if it would be possible for her to
continue her on-screen conversation while he worked his magic behind
her. His hands slid up under her shirt and ran back down her sides,
thrusting her jogging pants to the floor in one swift motion. He
squeezed her bottom and she moaned, but kept on typing and
continuing the conversation as if nothing out of the ordinary was
happening. Of course, to be completely correct, this wasn't exactly
an unusual situation.

Just another one of their games.

Thanks for looking, and letting me brag.

Tami Parrington (Tammy Lee)

September 4th, 2006, 10:17 AM
Good morning everyone!!

Just checking out the site!! Nice story is there more to it? I would like to read more!! :) I will probably be jumping in and out, school starts here is boston on tuesday and must finishe shopping for the young lady high school
9th grade!! Have fun everyone and I will check back later!!

Happy Labor Day everyone!1

September 4th, 2006, 12:00 PM
Hi everybody, my name my new short erotica
COMPUTER GAMES is now at Lady Aibell Press.Thanks for looking, and letting me brag.

Tami Parrington (Tammy Lee)

Congrats to you Tammy!!!!

September 4th, 2006, 02:59 PM
Good morning everyone!!

Just checking out the site!! Nice story is there more to it? I would like to read more!! :) I will probably be jumping in and out, school starts here is boston on tuesday and must finishe shopping for the young lady high school
9th grade!! Have fun everyone and I will check back later!!

Happy Labor Day everyone!1

Hi Bebe! *waving* Thanks for the comments, sure there's more. LOL. Thanks for joining my list earlier today, too. I look forward to chatting more with you.

Thanks, Jennzilla. It's nice getting my feet wet on the author's side once again.

September 7th, 2006, 04:59 PM
Here's an excerpt from my sf/comedy/erotic-romance serial BRANDI WHYNE AND HER INCREDIBLY EROTIC ADVENTURES
eXtasy Books (http://www.extasybooks.com)

What do you get when Star Wars meets Sherwood Forest? Mix in a little Pirates of the Caribbean, Fanny Hill and Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy and you get Brandi Whyne and Her Incredibly Erotic Adventures (with Robin Manhood and His Totally Sexed-Out Space Pirates). With a
series title that long, you know it’s just gotta be good!

In Chapter One: Captured by Space Pirates! we meet our heroine, the strong-willed, hot-blooded Brandi Whyne. Brandi is a comely lass orphaned at a young age. Now twenty-two and working as a barmaid in hellhole spaceport, Brandi finds her virginity threaten. That is,
until a tall, mysterious stranger waltzes into the bar and rescues her. To Brandi’s delight her rescuer turns out to be none other than the wickedly handsome Robin Manhood, wanted space pirate and captain of the Pulsating Purple Parsnip. Brandi decides to join Robin’s crew of sexual deviants and freedom fighters in their quest to provide the
galaxy with a endless supply of cheap adult toys and even cheaper laughter.

From Chapter One: Captured by Space Pirates! by Celine Chatillon

“Now, tell me…why should I allow a captive to handle sensitive equipment aboard my ship?”

Robin pulled the cloak’s cord loose from my neck. The flowing garment puddled on the floor at my feet. The bridge crew gawked and whistled at my matching lacy white undies and bra set, drool pooling in the corner of their mouths. I bit my lip and held my chin high. No way
I’d show weakness in front of this unsavory lot!

“I love dem feisty redheads,” muttered an alien crewmen from an unfamiliar species. He was working on what I assumed was the weapons console. “And so does Zelda. Should we call Zelda to the bridge for a bout of discipline, Robin?”

The hunchback’s beady one-eyed stare made me feel like a million Arcturan slime ants were crawling all over me. I held my breath in anxious anticipation and tried not to cringe. Discipline? Why in the goddess’s good name did anyone need to be punished for simply trying to help?

“Zelda?” Chuckling, Robin patted the cyclops on what I assumed was his shoulder. “Ah, Bigguns! That’s my man…I do like the way you think. But Zelda’s not quite called for—yet.”

Robin bent to scoop his cloak off the deck, threw it over his
shoulder and turned to face me. “Enlighten us…why should we trust you? You’re not one of us.”

He came closer and lowered his voice to a sexy whisper. “How do I know where your loyalties lie, Brandi Whyne?”

I frowned. Trust me? Why, there was no good reason for me to trust him!

But I held my caustic remarks in check, remembering that I was a guest on Robin’s ship. I was an outsider. I realized that I had a huge task ahead of me… I had to earn each and every crewmember’s respect—up to and including the captain’s.

I smiled and spoke calmly. “I understand. I must show myself worthy of your confidence and regard. But as I told you before, I had nothing to live for working at the Black Whole. I’ve been studying on my own for years, skimping and saving to earn enough to buy passage
on a ship off this crappy planet. I promise, if you will allow me to assist you in your activities, I will prove myself a loyal and worthy colleague.”

My speech was greeted with assorted cheers and claps. “Well, said, well said!” So much for convincing the crew. If only Robin would act persuaded.

“I like the way she talks,” mumbled a slumped figure sitting with his back turned in the science officer’s chair. “And I like her ass, too. Give her a chance, Robin. We could do worse.”

Robin glared at the greasy black-haired man with sallow skin and narrow eyes. “Yes, we could do worse—we’ve done so in the past. Haven’t we, Dr. Kwak?”

Kwak grinned crookedly. “Hey, who else but a doctor on the run from a medical malpractice case would agree to sign on as ship’s physician aboard a pirate vessel?”

“Medical malpractice?” Willie rolled his eyes. “You bloody well nearly killed off the entire population of that colony by giving them rat poison instead of radiation pills.”

“Hey, I explained that to you guys already.” Kwak’s flustered face contorted. “It was an accident. The packages looked so damn similar.”

My heart plummeted. Oh, well, Dr. Kwak couldn’t be any worse a medic than the ones who practiced at the Women’s Free Clinic next door to the Shrine of the Goddess of Fertility, Fun and Family Planning. But
I still jumped as he slapped a small bio-scanner device onto my breast.

“Sorry. I know it’s a bit icy, but they work better that way, and I like the way your tits peak when they’re cold…”

He scanned the data on his bio-med screen, arching a think black eyebrow. “Hmm. Ah-ha. Umm. She’s in good shape, Robin. And I mean more than just her curves.”

Robin quickly glanced at the data about my personal health then turned back to the navigation console. “Just give her all the necessary shots, Kwak—-minus the rat poison this time.”

“Sure, no problemo, mi capitano.”

Kwak reached into a black leather bag standing beside his console and retrieved a hypo-spray.

“This dope is to regulate your fertility cycles and to protect you from all those nasty space pirate sexually transmitted diseases—among other things.” He quickly gave me the shot, then lowered his voice. “Should I tell Robin the news, or will you?”

I blushed. “Tell him what?”

“You know and I know… But he really should know, considering he captured you and all. He’ll want first crack at you.”

I lifted my chin defiantly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”But I did know what he was talking about—I just didn’t think it any of his business. Dr. Kwak may have been a first class fuck-up as a doctor, but he wasn’t altogether stupid. The bio scan had revealed that I was still a virgin. This information I needed to keep to
myself until I told Robin of my vow to the goddess.

“Whatever you say, toots. It’s your hymen.”

Available now from eXtasy Books:

Chapter One: Captured by Space Pirates!

Chapter Two: Lashed at the Mast!

Chapter Three: Bound for Adventure!

More about this innovative series:

Celine @-->@-->@-->

PS Sign up for my newsletter to read excerpts from my upcoming books.


February 4th, 2007, 04:50 PM
What great teasers!

You all did a great job picking sections that make me want to read the whole book!

February 4th, 2007, 10:55 PM
Thanks! Brandi Whyne and Her Incredibly Erotic Adventures has two more installments as well...

Episodes available now from eXtasy Books:

Chapter One: Captured by Space Pirates! http://tinyurl.com/zqwbm

Chapter Two: Lashed at the Mast!

Chapter Three: Bound for Adventure! http://tinyurl.com/jx7hz

Chapter Four: Little John's Big Problem http://tinyurl.com/y4w95d

Chapter Five: The Search for Brandi's Crack http://tinyurl.com/y896n5

Find out more about this innovative series (excerpts, too): http://www.celinechatillon.com/brandi.html

Celine @-->@-->@-->

July 25th, 2007, 11:02 PM

(AQP Bestseller & Winner in the 2007 Amber Heat Wave)

"Sex among the stars has never been hotter...or crazier."

Abducted by aliens and facing sex-training from the deadly delicious Deuce, a lonely woman battles to hang on to her wits and her heart. Little does she realize she and Deuce will soon join forces in the wildest escape plan two naked people tied into one weird chair have ever risked. If they succeed, an even bigger plan awaits them. If not... Well, at least they'll die smiling.


Boy, people were jerks, weren't they? Whoever invented humanity had a lot to answer for. Thinking grim thoughts, Sam shot a bird at the driver who'd just cut in front of her. He was lucky she didn't have a gun. She glared through her cracked windshield at the bumper-to-bumper traffic, knowing she was going to be late for work.


Knowing her wheezing auto was overheating.


What she didn't know was where she'd find the money to get it fixed, not to mention pay her rent and utilities--especially if she got fired, as seemed likely since she was already on probation at the job for mouthing off to an ass-pinching sleazeball...who'd turned out, unfortunately, to be the firm's newest, biggest client. Sheesh, you'd think she'd been the offender and not him. Could life get any worse?

Funny she should ask that.

Without warning, a blinding flash struck! A buzzy, fuzzy, tingling rush and--whiz--car, traffic, all her earthly worries were far away. Earth itself was far away.

And she had a whole new set of worries.

"Holy shit," she muttered, hoping the sound of her own voice would add an element of sanity to the situation.

It didn't.

She stood frozen, staring, her heart racing and eyes popping. She'd read about happenings like this in the tabloids while waiting in line at the supermarket--on those rare occasions when she could afford to buy groceries--but she'd never believed those absurd headlines. She wasn't sure she believed them even now.

What the hell was this? A spaceship? It looked like something straight out of Star Wars, like something Han Solo might fly--if he was really down on his luck--dusty, rusty, loose wires dangling everywhere, and it stank like...

"Shit," she repeated. "I've been abducted by aliens."

Smelly aliens.

She counted seven before her on the bridge of the craft. Small, grotesquely humanoid figures in a motley assortment of tights, tunics, and curly-toed booties. The Ren-faire costuming struck an oddly jarring note against the sci-fi setting, making her head swim. The creatures had stocky little bodies, broad faces with big, bulbous eyes, and bright, bushy shocks of hair sticking straight up from their scalps. Hair that traveled the color-spectrum from screaming red through orange, yellow, green, turquoise and blue to pulsating purple, each alien with his own separate hue. They made her think of three-foot-high troll dolls, or almost. They also had wicked-looking yellowish points protruding over their lower lips. Terrific. Troll dolls with fangs. ...