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Samantha Lucas
July 15th, 2008, 09:56 PM
So here's my thought, I'll start this running thread and try to post several times a week about the fascinating, scintillating, glamorous life of an author...namely me.

And if you're still with me and not rolling on the floor laughing like my kids were, we're all good! http://www.cobblestone-mainstreet.com/forums/images/smilies/newsmilies/rotf.gif:roflmao:

So what was the glamorous author (me http://www.cobblestone-mainstreet.com/forums/images/smilies/icon_wink.gif) doing today? Well, besides seetting up my new forum room here, Dale's been home since Friday, and it had been about three weeks since I'd seen him. Dale's my fiance for anyone who doesn't know, and he drives a cargo van for a living, so he's on the road about 3 weeks out of the month. :p But we carry on. lol

So we went to see Hitch Friday night in our local park. You know, picnics, movies under the stars, that kind of thing. It was wonderful! Then we spent much of Saturday watching Policeman vs Fireman on meta cafe...if you have no idea what I'm talking about, check out my blog (http://samanthalucas.com/blog) today, there's a youtube box and a link to the site. It's too funny!

I just love being with Dale so much, he makes me laugh like crazy. We don't even have to be doing anything, I just like being in the same space with him. Of course, best of all is I don't think I've ever felt so loved in all my life. It confounds me to be honest. I don't speak with most members of my family and outside of Kevin and Mark (my two best friends) I don't really have a ton of friends, I'm a bit of a recluse. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/redface.gif

So this leads up to last week's struggles. I was struggling with everything! Writing stuff, life stuff, kid stuff, house stuff. blech blech blech http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/tongue.gif So yeah, it was a week! To be fair, I do tend to over think everything, but I find that things sort of all come to a head all at the same time and it gets overwhelming, to say the least. As the new week has dawned, however, peace has resumed.

I struggle with guilt for ending my marriage, and compound that with the need to make my new life amazing so I can somehow justify my leaving, and it makes a VERY stressed Samantha. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/tongue.gif My friend Kevin told me last week that if I spent half the time I spend chasing my tail with "what ifs", writing instead, I'd have a fifty books out.

He had a point.

And it's not that I didn't already know that, but for some reason when he said it, it hit home and made me start thinking in a different direction. Then Dale comes home and I told him how I'm constantly fretting that he'll realize I'm sooooo not worth the effort and dump me. So anyway, serious conversation ensued and it went very well.

Hell, we even did a budget, and there wasn't one tense moment!!! No arguing, no hurt feelings, no anger, nothing! We were on the exact same page!!!

I've never had that experience in my life!

He did have one teeny issue that he wanted me to work on... I have a real need to constantly see it as my money and his money (primarily because he has soooooo much more of it than I do!) and he wants me to stop that. It's our money apparently. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif He trusts me and really truly loves me!! It's amazing.

I think it'll be a while before I've assimilated all that went on this weekend, but lets just say, I think I'm going into life with the intention of relaxing and enjoying it. How successful I'll be, who knows, but I'm going to try.

I did lose another 2.4 pounds last week, my second week officially on Weight Watchers. For more info on that you can check out my personal blog (http://samanthasinsights.blogspot.com/), I usually blog on Saturdays about weight coz that's the day I weigh in Blech :P But anyway, I'm psyched over that! Although with Dale home, we've eaten out and had drinks :eat: and I've over indulged at least once, but I'm not worried about it. I won't see him again for another month and I was somewhat careful with my choices. So if I've gained this week, I'm not giving up and I'm not hating myself for it. It's just back on track the second Dale walks out the door. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

In writing news, I'm VERY excited about a new series of books I'm working on now...and when I say series, well, I'm still in the initial stages of plotting, but the idea is to release a new book (about 50k) in this series every other month for at least two years!

What I'm hoping is to have people anxiously waiting for the next book in the series every month! I can not even begin to tell you how excited I am about this. It'll be something unlike anything else out there, so it's a gamble, but my heart is so deeply invested, I'm hoping it pays off!

Anyway, I guess that's it for now. Have a great rest of the week all...and RELAX!!! http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/smile.gif

Dani
July 16th, 2008, 02:28 AM
Okay, you sounds about like me, but I have different problems. I'm still always "what ifing" things even though it's not always worth it. LOL!

hollie
July 16th, 2008, 07:07 AM
I still IF and BUT usually about the kids or money - not as much now - stopping smoking helped with the money cos we didn't let what we where saving slip into the household buget we try and save (at least some ) of it for other stuff. as for the kids i've found if i chase my tail about them to much i mix them up and they usually sort thing out for themselfs - see there is a plus to having 4 kids.
Hope all goes well with your series a book every other month sounds like alot of work

Debora Dennis
July 16th, 2008, 09:37 AM
Welcome to the coffee time forums - and congrats on your success! I can so relate to your "what-ifs" - I'm constantly second guessing myself.

Samantha Lucas
July 16th, 2008, 02:13 PM
OMG Dani, you have no idea! It's gotten quite bad lately, but between Kevin and Mark, I think they've kind of given me the shake I needed, so I'm going to try to cut back on the over thinking and try to just relax and enjoy more. All things considered, I'm an extremely lucky woman. ;-)

Hollie, I have 2 kids and Dale has 2 kids, so I suddenly have 4!!! I have soooooo much respect for you! lol My two though are 14 and nearly 18. I think I'm learning with them, I've done good by them and they're smart kids, so I'm definitley not quite as assualted but the waht ifs when it comes to them...not quite. lol

As for the series, I'm sure it will be a lot of work, but when I'm in writing mode, I write like a fiend! I think every other month will be about the perfect rate for me, but who knows, once I get into it, I may have to adjust, but I hope not. :)

Hi Debora and thanks for the welcome! I've just signed on with Blade myself, so that means we're related now. :) And congrats on your book, I saw some fabulous reviews for it! :notworthy:

Dani
July 16th, 2008, 02:39 PM
I have a son with an autistic spectrum disorder, so I seem to "what if" a lot of the time. Then I try to chill out and re-evaluate the situation and decide. It gets bad sometimes, but some how I manage.

hollie
July 16th, 2008, 04:05 PM
thats all we can do Dani I always tey to remember there is always some one worse or look for something i've done that is harder

Samantha Lucas
July 17th, 2008, 12:56 PM
I have a son with an autistic spectrum disorder, so I seem to "what if" a lot of the time. Then I try to chill out and re-evaluate the situation and decide. It gets bad sometimes, but some how I manage.

That's SO true. It's been amazing to me, my ability to keep going even when I think I can't possible take another step. In general I tend to say if I wake up and my kids are healthy, then everything else is managable.

hollie
July 17th, 2008, 01:03 PM
Thats my "we've been through worse than this" when my youngest was born he was 9 weeks prem then at 5 weeks old he had to go into intensive care and for a while it was touch and go. As long as we are healthy nothing else matters

Samantha Lucas
July 17th, 2008, 01:06 PM
Thats my "we've been through worse than this" when my youngest was born he was 9 weeks prem then at 5 weeks old he had to go into intensive care and for a while it was touch and go. As long as we are healthy nothing else matters

Exactly! I've been incredibly blessed with my kids, health wise, but I did have four miscarriages over the span of two and a half years, that was heartbreaking.

Debora Dennis
July 17th, 2008, 03:55 PM
I have a son with an autistic spectrum disorder, so I seem to "what if" a lot of the time. Then I try to chill out and re-evaluate the situation and decide. It gets bad sometimes, but some how I manage.

My oldest is an Aspie (Aspergers Syndrome - on the autism spectrum) so I can totally relate to those bad days and getting through! Chilling out is sometimes easier said than done around my house.

Which is the reason I write romantic fiction!

Dani
July 17th, 2008, 05:41 PM
Deborah, my son has Pervasive Developmental Disorder. He's displays more aspects of Oppositional Defiant Disorder though (at least to me). We've also been told he has a slight case of Aspergers Syndrome NOS (is how they said it), but his doctor that we've been seeing for almost 2 years now says she doesn't see that, just the PDD.

I understand about chilling out sometimes being easier said than done. I don't always get to chill out because when he's in a big rage (which hasn't happened in a while) he's out of control and you have to just go along for the ride, try not to let anything happen and make sure no one gets hurt. Sometimes during the full moon it seems like I have to walk on egg shells because one little thing can set him off. I can say that it seems to be getting better now that he's older, but I'm not sure how puberty is going to effect him. I think during that time I'll put my nose into the longest book I can find. LOL! readingbookfast

Samantha Lucas
July 18th, 2008, 01:27 PM
My ex has aspberger's my youngest has the Opositional Defiatn and my oldest ADD, and so do I actually, so we're just an all encompassing fruit basket of disorders. :err:

Samantha Lucas
July 18th, 2008, 01:29 PM
WOW! It's been a busy week.

Anytime Dale's here though, the time just flies. I honestly can't believe it's Friday already.

I've been researching a new story the last couple days, it's for a charity call at Blade Publishing to benefit an animal rescue. How excited do we all think I am about that? If you want more info on the charity or the call, I posted it on my blog (http://samanthalucas.com/blog), Wednesday, so when you get there, scroll down a bit, you'll find it. ;-)

Anyway, the stories need to be about someone who rescues or cares for animals. My story is involves a woman who rescues sea otters caught in oil spills. It's been fascinating research so far! Plus, I've always loved otters. ;) So I'm excited about the new story. Hopefully I'll have it pretty much all worked out by next week, then polished and subbed the week after. :)

I'm trying to live my life in three week blocks these days. This is the amount of time Dale is usually gone for. I figure with every three weeks, I write a story, I lose ten pounds, and I decorate a room. :) This time around it's the very teeny extra room we've decided to turn into a master bedroom.

I'm excited because I'm going shopping for paint and curtains today. :D I also have to run errands, hit the bank and grocery shop. sigh So not much writing done today I'm thinking. :p

Anyway, that's really it for now, hope the week is going well for everyone, and if you want to see some cute animal photos, stop by my blog (http://samanthalucas.com/blog)today, there's a few posted. :) TTYL ~ Samantha

Samantha Lucas
July 20th, 2008, 12:05 PM
It could have something to do with staying up until six in the morning two nights in a row, but whatever, I'm still tired! lol

And why did you stay up so late?

Writing? ...nope.

Trouble at home? ...nope

Insomnia? ...nope.

I was addictively playing The Sims2!

I don't let myself play that game very often, because when I do, it's like an alcoholic going on a bender! I don't come up for days!!!! The other day, you see, was just a long day of dead ends and by around ten o'clock or so, I decided to just call it a night, climb in bed, order take-out and knock up sims for the rest of the night...sim babies are SO cute... anwyay...

Good plan.

BUT

My sims had "other" plans!!!

First off, I decide I'm going to create a nice little couple, career focused, but with a bit of a playful side, put them in a house together from the start, turn off their aging and let them rise to the top levels of their career tracks, then start knocking her up till they've had a bagillion kids!

But when I went back in to create the guy, the sim generator gave me a second girl instead, and she was sooooooooooooo cute, I couldn't delete her. So I made her the first girl's sister, and decided they could all live in the same house together and decided for themselves who would pair up.

Not a bad plan, so off we go.

It was clear from the beginning that the business sim (Fern) was far more interested in her career as a professional dancer then she was in the guy. And the guy (Kieren) first entered the military, then became a musician, while Jaqui (the sister) became a home body, cleaning, cooking , making friends, and planting a garden. It was all lovely, until my cheat window refused to open and I couldn't turn off the aging!!! =O

So there they all are, aging away madly! and living their happy little sim lives. Eventually Jaqui and Kieren (yes with a small nudge from me, because they did nothing on their own!) started flirting, which led to kissing, which led to making out, which led to SEX!!! which led to a surprise proposal at the breakfast table one morning.

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

So all was good.

Until Jaqui became a little obsessed with her garden.

Dun dun dun...

All she cared about was her garden and she was spending more and more time out there until finally, one day, I looked up...AND SHE'D BECOME A PLANT SIM!!!!!

A walking breathing plant. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif

It was bad, so now all she needed was love (which she got from talking to her eggplants) water and sunlight to survive, unlike regular sims who had environmental needs, food needs, entertainment needs, and so on and so on.

So she continued on with her garden obsession, much to the distraughtness of her fiance and her sister.

Eventually they began trying interventions. The sister called the garden club because she knew they sold the potion to unplant yourself, but when the garden club woman arrived, all Jaqui did was request membership!

Then the sister, feeling bad for the fiance, started flirting with him, herself! Eventually they were caught in a romantic embrace and there was much slapping! Everyone was mad at everyone!!!

One day the fiance had had ENOUGH! He wanted his fiancee back. He wanted to get married and have children! So he called the garden club, intent on buying the potion himself and FORCING Jaqui to take it! But when they arrived, she refused to answer the door!

So he FUCKED Fern!!!!!

Who of course as a result ended up pregnant!!! http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif

They felt very guilty, but for the sake of their baby, decided to try and move on from Jaqui and see if they had a future together.

Meanwhile, Jaqui was in sunlight deprivation, but she kept trying to go take a shower! If she didn't get sunlight for a long period of time, she would pass out, maybe even DIE!

So I told her to go sit on the front lawn and watch the clouds for a bit.

It seemed peaceful. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/smile.gif

And I'm sure it was...

UNTIL THE METEOR FELL FROM THE SKY AND CRUSHED HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gifhttp://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gifhttp://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif

And then the grim reaper came, but since she'd been on such bad terms with her sister and fiance (whom she'd recently broken up with because she felt it was only right that he be with his baby, so he's all kinds of pissed with her, coz he still loved her and wanted to marry her) anyway, bad terms...the grim reaper REFUSED to listen to their pleas for mercy and took her!!!!!

OMG!!!!!

So now...

(and yes it was about this point in the story that Z --my oldest-- said, I'm leaving. I refuse to hear one more word about your desperate housesims. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif Can you believe that??!!)

Anyway, so Fern and Kieren can't stand to live in the house they'd shared lo these many years (plus they are a little worried what the pissed off ghost may do to them), so after the baby is born (a boy they named Julian) they move to a new house with the intention of making a life together work.

But once there, some new neighbors come to greet them and lo and behold if Kieren doesn't take one look at Gracie and fall head over heels in love at first sight with her!!!!!

So now he has a terrible dilemma. What does he do? Stay with the mother of his child, in a loveless marriage, or take a chance on happiness with Gracie?

OH THE HUMANITY!!!!!

So that's where my weekend has disappeared to so far and I swear, I have the least supportive kids on the planet. Z's always wanting to rain on my parade...sniffle, he's all, "You do realize these are sims right? They don't have free thought!

LOL sheesh! Obviously he's never played the game. Of course they do! lmao!!!


So anyway in other news, I'm in second round edits on Unatamable. I'm starting a new writing project tomorrow for a charity call. yay! And this week in weight loss...well, lets just call it a learning week.

And what did we learn?

You can't not drink water, and eat at steak houses and McDonalds and Chinese buffets and have alcoholic beverages and still lose weight! http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif

I KNOW!

You must clearly be as shocked as I am!!!

Ok fine, so I blew it this week, but Dale was home!

And yes that was whining you heard. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

Anyway, the sound you hear now is me, dusting myself off and starting fresh this week. And next time Dale comes home, I need a better plan than, "go hog wild!" sheesh. :P

Ok off to play more sims, I'm taking the weekend off!! What a concept. lol

Have a fabulous week everyone! http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif ~ Samantha

hollie
July 20th, 2008, 03:34 PM
What a great way to spend a weekend me and Jojo like the sims but we haven't tried sims 2 yet

Dani
July 21st, 2008, 01:50 AM
Dang woman! I haven't had a video game do that to me since Tetris and Frogger (Geesh, I'm so showing my age). Well, I take that back, I have Sudoku on my Brain Age game that I play over and over again. I really need to get something different, but there's not a lot that appeals to me. I like the older video games. I had one called Jungle Hunt (for my Intellivision system) that I loved to play. Oh, and I can't forget Burger Time. That one got the attention of my mom AND dad (and my dad never played video games). LOL!

I've heard about the PAWS for Thought books from Blade Publishing. Abby came over and mentioned it in their section in Java Junction, so if any of the authors here were interested they could submit something. Michael Elan is going to be the cover model for the books since it's his organization, It's Meow or Never, that the profits are going to once the royalties are paid. I think it's a great idea!

Samantha Lucas
July 21st, 2008, 12:34 PM
What a great way to spend a weekend me and Jojo like the sims but we haven't tried sims 2 yet

Oh you have to upgrade! Well, if you like the game. lol It's sooooo much better and so much more controllable, which is fabulous if you are a contorl freak like me. :D

Of course, then the Sims3 is suposedly coming out next year I think. I've promsed myself not to buy it until they start combing it with the expantion packs, coz I bought every singel expansion for Sims2, I'm terrified to do the math. :sofa:

Samantha Lucas
July 21st, 2008, 12:41 PM
Dang woman! I haven't had a video game do that to me since Tetris and Frogger (Geesh, I'm so showing my age).

On the whole, I get sucked into games waaaaay too easily and lose vast amounts of time, which is why I love the downloadable hour long demo! I figure I play that, after an hour, it quits on me, and I go back to real life. LOL



I've heard about the PAWS for Thought books from Blade Publishing. Abby came over and mentioned it in their section in Java Junction, so if any of the authors here were interested they could submit something. Michael Elan is going to be the cover model for the books since it's his organization, It's Meow or Never, that the profits are going to once the royalties are paid. I think it's a great idea!

Yep that's the one. :) I have three great ideas for a story and I keep thinking I've decided, then I keep second guessing myself. lol Oh well, I've got edits anyway, but I need to get going on this!

And on a side note, Abby is fabulous! And I highly recommend Blade Publishing. I only say that, because I know how skittish people are these days about new e-pubs (myself included) so anytime I can slip in how wonderful I think they are, I do. ;-)

Dani
July 22nd, 2008, 12:04 AM
I'm sure that there's going to be more than one book coming out, so save the other two stories for future versions.

Samantha Lucas
July 22nd, 2008, 07:11 PM
I'm sure that there's going to be more than one book coming out, so save the other two stories for future versions.

You have a good point and of course I immediately got disctracted anyway. My Samhain editor sent out emails saying she was open for submissions, so I started a pair of books about two best friends. I'm just barely into the first one, but I haven't been this excited about a book in a really long time, so keep your fingers crossed that Sasha likes it!

I hope I hope I hope I hope lol

Dani
July 22nd, 2008, 07:19 PM
Crossing fingers and toes! :biggrin:

Samantha Lucas
July 23rd, 2008, 01:40 PM
Crossing fingers and toes! :biggrin:

Thank you!

Can we also add to that wish, that the cats will chill long enough for me to write more than a thousand words??!!

I swear, one actually leaped from the sofa behind my desk, OVER my head and landed on the laptop!

I soooo need an office. lol

Samantha Lucas
July 23rd, 2008, 01:42 PM
Late last night I got my latest cover and I'm thrilled!

It's the work of Croco, who I still think is a complete cover art genius and I can't thank her enough for this one.

This is for my latest Cobblestone Press release. There's no release date yet, but I'll keep y'all posted. ;-)


http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Cover%20Art/Large%20Uniform%20Covers/legacyoffear_150x225.jpg

destinyrae
July 23rd, 2008, 02:12 PM
What if that next book is the one that turns me into a bestselling author? Hmmm... What if?

Let's face it. The "what if's" aren't going anywhere. Let's make them into fantasies and daydreams!

Dani
July 24th, 2008, 01:51 AM
Thank you!

Can we also add to that wish, that the cats will chill long enough for me to write more than a thousand words??!!

I swear, one actually leaped from the sofa behind my desk, OVER my head and landed on the laptop!

I soooo need an office. lol
ROFL!! Yes we can add the cats too. I have two that are sometimes all over the place, so I know how you feel. :biggrin:


Late last night I got my latest cover and I'm thrilled!

It's the work of Croco, who I still think is a complete cover art genius and I can't thank her enough for this one.

This is for my latest Cobblestone Press release. There's no release date yet, but I'll keep y'all posted. ;-)


http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Cover%20Art/Large%20Uniform%20Covers/legacyoffear_150x225.jpg

Your cover is beautiful! Congrats on it Samantha! Bouncy Icon Smilie

Samantha Lucas
July 24th, 2008, 02:04 AM
Oh I hear you Destiny.

I don't what if the what to write that much, but the who to sub it to...OMG!


And thank you Dani!

That poor little story's got a past, but I'm so glad it found a home at Cobblestone and I can't wait to share it with everyone. :D

Ok I only got about 1500 words written today, and tomorrow, I'm painting and in theory, dying curtains...and praying I don't ruin them. Beggin' Smilie

If all goes well, I may actually have a bedroom (WITH A DOOR!!) so come Friday...damn, bank and errands :arghhhh: Okay, so come Saturday, sheesh, I should be able to close the door and write!

Woo Hoo! Woo Hoo! Woo Hoo!

I need to be writing around 6 or 7k a day, but lately I'm lucky if I hit a thousand. ugh

Anyway, half asleep and can't even remember my point. lol

Night all

Dani
July 24th, 2008, 02:17 AM
Good luck with the curtains!

Hope you have a great nights sleep too.

hollie
July 24th, 2008, 07:47 AM
I love your cover it's very pretty

Samantha Lucas
July 25th, 2008, 12:04 AM
OMG the curtain thing did NOT work out at all!

I tried taking all the color out first, like they recommended, but they just turned brown. So then I tried to die them purple anyway, and they just ended up the exact same burgundy they'd been before I started!

I was trying to save some money, coz I got these curtains at the thrift store, and they're really nice, I just hate the color, but alas, I think i'm buying new ones. :p

Dani
July 25th, 2008, 01:37 AM
Did you try bleaching the color out of them?

Samantha Lucas
July 26th, 2008, 01:32 AM
I did!

The whole thing was a huge fiasco and I spent seventy bucks today on new curtains! Although, they may have to go back. lol I kinda got carried away. :TroutSlap:

Dani
July 26th, 2008, 03:04 PM
Well, that's what most of us women do when we go shopping. Laugh it Up fuzball

Samantha Lucas
July 27th, 2008, 10:47 AM
I swear, I had more going on this week than I normally do and I feel as though I've been running behind all week, which perfectionistic me HATES!

I've been trying to turn what is technically a laundry room, into a master bedroom...says the eternal optimist, but in doing so, I swear to God, the rest of the place looks like it exploded!

I attempted to die curtains, which did not work out at all, and ended up buying some new ones, which of course look SO much nicer anyway. I painted...with leftover paint in several shades of purple and white--did I mention money's been tight around here lately lol--so I used an old technique for painting that doesn't require uniform coverage, but in places, it's REAL purple, Dale's gonna die! lol Poor Dale.

I'm hoping to get that project finished up when I'm done here. We've got a bookcase to move, and the bed, then the fun part, with plants and art :D Then it's done and I have a room with a door!!! ...and a washer and dryer, but hey, it'll make folding easier. :D

I did NOT weigh myself yesterday because I didn't follow the weight watchers program even one day last week! This is my biggest stumbling block to losing the weight...LIFE!

I got busy, I got angry, I got stressed, I got depressed, and none of those emotions care about my weight. Sheesh. This week needs to be better, but Dale will be here all week too, so huge test in that respect, we'll have to see. :err:

This week was an emotional roller coaster too, for some reason, I got really, really angry, just at life in general. To be honest, as I was telling my amazingly wonderful friend, Mark, last night, I think I quite frankly crumbled this last week under the enormous weight on my shoulders. :goinginsane:

Truth of the matter is, I'm alone. I have no family, no friends who live just down the street, and a significant other who's on the road all the time. I try not to share all the stupid life stuff that goes on, on a daily basis with him, because there isn't a damn thing he can do and he knows this. So it just ends up leaving him frustrated and trying to fix things he can't really fix, which drives me nuts.

So when a week like last week happens, I go under, because there isn't anyone to grab onto. I'm not trying to whine, truly I am normally a person who always remembers people have it worse than me every day. Mark, however, said last night, that sometimes, it's okay to just look at what's going on in your own life and say "This sucks"

Okay, but he said it with his adorable British accent and it sounded so much better, than it looks right there in print. lol

Anyway, maybe he's right, I don't know. My fear is, I'll start saying "this sucks" constantly! =O I mean, so money's tight, the house is a wreck, and I'm lonely...big deal! It does suck and I am trying to fix it, but I can't help but think of people who have so many more troubles on their shoulders and how truly blessed I am.

And on that note...a great man, in my opinion, died this week. Professor Randy Pausch. If you've never heard of him, you should check out his "last lecture (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo&feature=related)" and ABC is airing a tribute to him Tuesday night. http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=4614281&page=1

I love the tagline for this show they are running. It's something along the line of, "He was given six months to live, so what did he do? Only changed the world." It's so true, he did more with the last year of his life then most of us will do in our entire lifetimes. I admire and respect him more than I can say and if you haven't seen the last lecture, it's well worth your time.

My heart goes out to his wife, Jai, and my prayers will be with his family for a long time to come, but the one thing I keep coming back to, how amazing it is to die leaving behind the legacy of a life so well lived.

In writing news, I've got last round edits on Unatamable due, I'm working on a duet of stories that's total fantasy and if life ever calms down, I'll get them finished, but they're really fun stories. I've got the charity call for Blade, and two series that are due next books, plus I want to get working on that new long running series I was telling you all about last week...OMG I'm completely bogged down with projects!

I'm very fortunate, because though I can't afford luxury cars and trips to Europe, I can support myself with my writing and I know a lot of other authors struggling to do that very thing...so please don't take this next statement as a complaint or my being ungrateful, but I would very much like to get to the point, that to support myself, doesn't mean I need to have a new book come out every month or so.

I'd really love to get to the point where I could slow down a little and not have so many irons in the fire. I got a rejection this week (or more like a revise and resubmit) but there was so much to revise, I just seriously didn't see a time in the near future where I was going to be able to do it. :p Which is seriously annoying, but just the truth, I feel rushed all the time right now and I want to spend more time with my kids than I am. They are nearly all grown up and I don't want to waste any of the time I have left with them, even for writing.

Which comes to the last part of this exceedingly long post, I've done some priority shifting this past week. I haven't got it all ironed out yet, so I won't bore you with my thought process, but changes are coming...BIG ones!

Ok one last note, I had my website redesigned and though I'm going to make some special announcements about that next week, you all can see the finished product now at www.samanthalucas.com (http://www.samanthalucas.com) I got some advice for making it more agent/editor friendly and it turned out beautiful. Especially the book page...it rocks! :D

Okay, that's it for now, I hope everyone has a lovely week, if you don't hear from me much this week, it's because Dale is home and we have this insane plan of overhauling the entire house and having a HUGE yard sale. If you're in the vicinity you should drop by! Thanks for spending some of your day with me, see you next week. ;-)

Samantha Lucas
August 3rd, 2008, 08:52 AM
In case anyone noticed, I was MIA everywhere this past week. I didn't blog, check in with any forums, I (hiding in shame) didn't even post anything for the daily awww.

Like I said in last week's post, Dale was home, and we were cleaning house in a major way. We had the yard sale. Friday was great, we got rained out Saturday, and we may give it a couple hours today before we head over to Goodwill with what's left.

Ok the bad parts, we had to move our bed out of the little haven I worked so damn hard on last, last week because the room only has one electrical outlet and apparently that disqualifies it for official bedroom. ugh

The landlord already told us after the city inspection next week, we can move it back, but looks like I'll be displaced a couple more weeks. At this point I suppose it doesn't really matter, but I'm sorta pissed to be honest. I just want to feel settled, it feels like forever since I have. :p

In other news, I got a prescription for reading glasses yesterday. Yes this does officially mean I'm getting old. :p And I found out I have high blood pressure. Like I freaking needed that!!!

I think it's probably only borderline really, so some lifestyle changes should take care off it, but when I stress (which is most all the time) it shoots through the roof. I was raised a Homeopath, so western medicine freaks me out! I certainly don't want to be medicated for this, so there needs to be some definite changes for me. woohoo :p

In weight loss news, I lost .8 of a pound, groan, but again with Dale being home I'm not paying attention to food and I'm probably doing a good deal of stress eating as well.

Well that's all the big news, house getting clean, me very stressed, glasses, high blood pressure...yay what a week! Hope next one is better!! See y'all next Sunday. :)

Samantha Lucas
August 7th, 2008, 08:21 AM
Dale left this morning, so life will slowly get back to normal. Which is weird, it should be normal when he's here, not when he's not. hmph!

Anyway, tomorrow the city inspector comes through our apartment. That should be interesting. :right:

So today, me and the oldest (and the youngest if he ever gets up!) have a bunch of finishing touches to make. I swear with the amount of stuff we got rid of, you'd think we'd be less crammed in here. We were, until we started bringing back in what was left! sheesh

Anyway, trying to take it easy and not spike the blood pressure. I gave up caffeine and salt cold turkey, restaurant and fast food, is being a little more difficult than I hoped.

Dale and I eat out a lot!

I think it's coz we really have no kitchen here, coz I love to cook, but I never do it here. :(

Anyway, I got next to no sleep last night and was up at five to see Dale off, so I'm thinking nap! Then I'm hoping to get going with my latest wip. I started it the other day, but I never get much writing done with Dale around. lol

It's the sequel to Untamable, no title as of yet, but I'll give you guys some sneak peaks as it gets going a bit further.

Once that's done, I'm going to try some discipline and actually complete and sub something to Silhouette...in theory. :swoon:
I love doing what I'm doing, but I hate Dale being on the road all the time, so if I can get a better writing gig, I have to step out of my comfort zone and go for it...don't let me chicken out!

ok that's it for now, I'm wiped out. ttyl :sleeping:

Samantha Lucas
August 8th, 2008, 09:00 AM
Okay, today's the day. The city inspector is supposed to be here at ten, which is just over an hour from now. I'm a nervous wreck, my blood pressure is up and I'm dizzy!

We've done all we can do, but I fear it's not enough. Plus I just hate official type people running amok through my home! We have to kennel five kittens and stash them in the neighbor's yard, thankfully I have good neighbors like that. :) Otherwise, I guess we wait and see. :eek: ugh

Dani
August 8th, 2008, 03:53 PM
Good luck Samantha! smilies/bump.gif

Samantha Lucas
August 9th, 2008, 09:46 AM
Ok, we got fined for having too many people and Andy was told we can't live here anymore. This is technically a one bedroom unit and it's overcrowded...so tell us something we don't already know. :p

Anyway, he's gonna talk to his wife, and get back to us, but the idea everyone is kicking around right now is for us to move to the upstairs unit.

Ok...

Negatives


moving is moving, don't care if it's upstairs or across the country, you still have to pack and move EVERYTHING!
Upstairs has no shower, only a bath tub
upstairs has no washer and dryer
we still have to get rid of pretty much all our animals because there's really no outside access period
which also means my little porch garden is gone and we no longer have a back patio for BBQing, which we actually do a lot of.
the fact that it is an upstairs unit only makes the move harder in my opinion. :p
It's still teeny! We're talking two bedrooms, but there would be a living room, though Dale says one of the bedrooms upstairs is no bigger than our laundry room, so I'm not seeing upstairs as being a great option

Pluses



It won't cost us any extra money to move (deposits, moving vans etc) and seeing as how we are SO broke right now, I'm not even sure we can afford a move anytime in the near future. And anyplace we move to, will inevitably cost more.
Z and A (my kids) can stay here near their friends.
this is a good location in it's on the bus line and it's near Hardees, which is how we've survived the past five months with 99 cent chicken sandwiches. Without that option, I have to buy groceries! ugh I hate money. :p
The rent is cheap and may even drop since we wouldn't have the washer dryer

That's all I got.

I'm trying not to freak out over this, but either way, we have to move, and Dale won't be here, so guess who gets to handle all the packing and arrangements. Moving is an extremely stressful time, and I will have done it three times in the past year now!! Plus I handle it badly, it's like someone dying!....THIS MAY KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not ready to die yet. :( :needhug:

I'm officially upgrading my life from sitcom to soap opera!!

And we need a drama queen smilie!!!!!!!!!!!

Megan Rose
August 9th, 2008, 10:05 AM
Samantha, I've really enjoyed reading this little insight into your life. Thanks so much for sharing it with us. And I have to say that the idea of watching movies in the park sounds fabulous. We don't seem to do that in the UK.

hollie
August 9th, 2008, 10:15 AM
oh sweetie i'm sorry to hear that, I hope it works out ok one thing about moving upstairs you don't have to 'pack' everything just pick it up and move it. It could be a game for the kids. Just a thought, let us know how you get on with it

Dani
August 9th, 2008, 09:39 PM
Ok, we got fined for having too many people and Andy was told we can't live here anymore. This is technically a one bedroom unit and it's overcrowded...so tell us something we don't already know. :p

Anyway, he's gonna talk to his wife, and get back to us, but the idea everyone is kicking around right now is for us to move to the upstairs unit.

Ok...
I'm so sorry to hear that. Why didn't they put you in the upstairs appartment in the first place nowing that you have a family? I understand that it's smaller rooms and none of the other things you like, but it would have been easier than having to move everything again.

I hope that things work out for you. I'll keep you in my thoughts. Big hugs!! HugMe

Samantha Lucas
August 10th, 2008, 11:56 AM
Samantha, I've really enjoyed reading this little insight into your life. Thanks so much for sharing it with us. And I have to say that the idea of watching movies in the park sounds fabulous. We don't seem to do that in the UK.

Awwww thank you so much Megan. Some people say I shouldn't share as much as I do, but that's just me. I'm pretty much an open book and I've always said, you just never know who you're going to touch in some way by something you've written...even if it's just a mundane life blog. lol

I have to admit, this last time when it was just Dale and I was so much more fun than when we take all the kids. lol I mean, that's a fun family thing and all, but it's just so much more romantic to sit holding hands under the stars, watching a movie. I think I prefer something more interactive when we've got the kids. :D

Samantha Lucas
August 10th, 2008, 11:57 AM
oh sweetie i'm sorry to hear that, I hope it works out ok one thing about moving upstairs you don't have to 'pack' everything just pick it up and move it. It could be a game for the kids. Just a thought, let us know how you get on with it

Thank you Hollie, there was a later development yesterday, the upstairs is off the table now, so it's just a flat out move and we have until Oct 1st. ugh

More of that in the last post though. ;-)

Samantha Lucas
August 10th, 2008, 12:00 PM
I'm so sorry to hear that. Why didn't they put you in the upstairs appartment in the first place nowing that you have a family? I understand that it's smaller rooms and none of the other things you like, but it would have been easier than having to move everything again.

I hope that things work out for you. I'll keep you in my thoughts. Big hugs!! HugMe

Ok, well backing up a bit, this was Dale's apartment for three years before he ever even met me. So when we decided to buy a house, we decided it would be better to combine households while we looked, to save money.

Well, my landlord was beyond words awful, so even though my place was bigger, we decided it was just for a couple months, we could make it work.

Honestly it totally surprised me the landlord even said yes to us all moving in. I mean it was crazy to shove this many people in here, but he said yes so we tried to make a go of it...then Dale got laid off, there went buying a house for at least another year and that brings us full circle to where we are now. :p

Samantha Lucas
August 10th, 2008, 12:05 PM
This week is a hard one for me to write about, it's been...well I officially upgraded my life from sitcom to soap opera! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/eye%20roll/eyerolling.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/eye%20roll/?action=view&current=eyerolling.gif)

Well in weight loss news, in case you missed the charming post at Introspection, I lost .2 of a pound.


http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/blink/blink-1.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/blink/?action=view&current=blink-1.gif)


Enough said.

So moving on, in writing news...well there isn't much. lol Did I show y'all my newest cover? Well I'll show it to you again just in case.

http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Cover%20Art/Large%20Uniform%20Covers/legacyoffear_150x225.jpg (http://samanthalucas.com/)

That is the work of the incredible Croco, one of probably four cover artists I am always thrilled to work with. I was exceptionally pleased to be assigned to her this time, and omg, she even thanked me for making her job so easy because I filled out the covert art form so well! =O

I SUCK at cover art forms!

Mabye I'm getting the hang of it. lol

Still no release date on Untamable, but I am finished edits on it and I started book two in that series last week. I really love this series because I'm going back to my roots so to speak. Taking my time and writing what I truly love and layering my characters with as much depth of emotion I can give them. :D

I'm really hoping readers take this one to heart, and understand the story I'm telling. I've lived a harsh life at times, granted I feel blessed, but it hasn't been easy, and the main thing I've discovered in my life so far, is that it's always love that heals our deepest wounds, and I think that's the message I'm put on the planet to tell. So I have to wound my heroes and heroines deep and that's not always pretty. Poor things. lol

Ok sorry kinda deep for this early, but thanks to my stupid blood pressure, I haven't had my caffeine in more than a week! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/Crazy_coldcaffeine_tweetz.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/?action=view&current=Crazy_coldcaffeine_tweetz.gif) I'm becoming a much more calm person and that makes me think!!!! And good lord, do we really want that???!!!

Are you ready?

Here we go...life.

As you know, we had a city code inspection last week. Dale was home for a week and a half (and you have no idea how much that hurt the bank account ugh) and we cleaned and sorted and yard saled our little hearts out!

We managed to delete our storage bin from how much we got rid of so that was good and we had the place....well, better anyway.

I know I've bemoaned you all to death about the size of this apartment, well guess what??!!

Now I get to move. --crickets chirping--

Yes that's right, the code inspector said you can not walk through a bedroom to get to the only bathroom, so she officially declared this place a one bedroom unit and hence forth it's VERY overcrowded with six people. :p Even if it is only six people once a month or so.

So we have until Oct 1st to move.

This will be the third freaking time I've moved in a year! I hate moving, I handle it badly and with Dale on the road all the time, guess who gets to find a place, handle all the paperwork and the packing?????

Oooh that's right!

ME.

Can we say pass the wine??? http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/WineandGlass.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/?action=view&current=WineandGlass.gif)

This is going to go soooooooo badly and poor Dale is going to have a coronary because he's stuck out on the road. The loads are few and far between at the moment between factory closings and an influx of drivers, so our budget is feeling it big time and there's nothing he can do here at home because he's out on the road. Except stress of course, because believe me, he's an in charge kinda guy.

http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Cartoons/cavemangary.png (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Cartoons/?action=view&current=cavemangary.png)


So anyway, that's the gigst of it all. I'd appreciate all the good thoughts anyone would like to throw my direction, I just don't even know where to start. :p

Hope you all have a great week. Thanks for spending part of it with me.

http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/thsmile.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/?action=view&current=thsmile.gif)

Dani
August 11th, 2008, 12:55 AM
The cover of your book is beautiful!

I will be sending good thoughts and wishes your way cause your gonna need them. I hear ya bout moving. It totally sucks and I hate having to pack and unpack, so I feel your pain there. How 'bout I find you a nice big bottle of wine and send it to ya? That'll help ease the stress a bit. LOL!

Samantha Lucas
August 11th, 2008, 03:30 PM
LOL You are SUCH a good woman!

Thing is, most of the stuff needing packed is Dale's and he won't be here...you think he'll notice if I clean house and get rid of more than I pack? :firedevil:

Dani
August 11th, 2008, 06:34 PM
You are SOOOOO bad, but I like your thinking on that idea. I don't think that he'd like that much though. Laugh it Up fuzball

Samantha Lucas
August 12th, 2008, 10:34 PM
Things are changing on almost an hourly basis and yesterday to be honest, I'd had enough, so I took the whole day off today! hmph so there. :p

The man who owns this house was told he could no longer rent it as two separate units, so he asked me if we wanted to rent the whole house. I told him there was no way we could afford the 800 he was getting for the whole house while it was two units, he said he'd talk to his wife and get back to me.

Meanwhile, I've been looking for someplace else obviously. I've found a couple of possibilities, all outside the city. (it's MUCH cheaper there lol)

This one house, I asked if the yard was fenced for the dog, he replied, it's fenced to keep cattle out, but I suppose it would keep your dog in. LMAO

Then there's a 3/2 mobile home sitting on 2 acres I'm sort of excited about because there's fruit trees and the owner said I could plant a garden and it's seriously in the country. I saw photos today, there's no other house to be seen in any direction!

I'll keep you posted...if the stress doesn't kill me first. :p

Dani
August 12th, 2008, 10:43 PM
Sounds like you've got some good prospects! Good luck.

Samantha Lucas
August 14th, 2008, 12:19 PM
It seems to be hit or miss. Dale and I have decided to just wait until he comes home in two weeks, go see everything we can see and make a decision then and there.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to get as much writing done as I can, because once the packing/moving crunch really hits, I won't be able to sit down long enough to write a single sentence. :P :P :P

Dani
August 15th, 2008, 10:09 PM
Well, at least you have a plan to start with. Maybe when he gets home y'all will find something right off the bat and maybe get moved in that same week too. I know, wishful thinking, but I'm tryin' for ya. :)

Samantha Lucas
August 16th, 2008, 10:57 AM
Oh that's ok, last night I was begging for the moving faeries, gnomes, elves, not picky, to show up and pack everything. :P

Talk about wishful thinking LOL

hollie
August 16th, 2008, 06:27 PM
Oh that's ok, last night I was begging for the moving faeries, gnomes, elves, not picky, to show up and pack everything. :P

Talk about wishful thinking LOL

We spent a few years having to move every 6 months and found that you can use what you have. Why take all the clothes out of a drawer to put it in a box. The drawer is a box it just don't have a top at worst you have tape a bit of card over the top to prvent stuff spilling out. Same with bedding and stuff, the only thing you have to be carefull of is the weight of your 'boxes'

Samantha Lucas
August 16th, 2008, 10:40 PM
We spent a few years having to move every 6 months and found that you can use what you have. Why take all the clothes out of a drawer to put it in a box. The drawer is a box it just don't have a top at worst you have tape a bit of card over the top to prvent stuff spilling out. Same with bedding and stuff, the only thing you have to be carefull of is the weight of your 'boxes'


Awww, thanks Hollie. :D

I'm really hoping once this cold is gone, I won't feel quite so grouchy and then maybe I'll be able to dig in with a clear head...hoping sadly not expecting lol

Samantha Lucas
August 16th, 2008, 10:41 PM
I'm afraid this week is going to be short and to the point, which is very unlike me, but I'm sick and tired and in general...anti social, crabby, and loopy!!!

Outside of all those things, life is about the same. I've been sick for the past three or four days, so I've really done next to nothing. I did get a release date for Untamable though!

SEPTEMBER SECOND

That's Sept 2nd!!!

Don't forget, go by Blade Publishing (http://bladepublishing.org/) for all the info and buy buy buy!!!

I know that was blatant, but did I mention the sick and crabby? lol

Seriously though, I am really proud of this story, I hope it will find a place in your hearts...on September 2nd! lol

As it gets a bit closer, I'll post an excerpt and a very small version of my newsletter, will have an exclusive peak at this story as well. The newsletter is going out next week, so you still have time to join (http://samanthalucas.com/newsletter.php) if you'd like. :D

In life news, I lost one whole pound last week, no clue how, but we'll just accept it and not assume it's muscle mass!

I'm praying more and more everyday that this move happens quickly and smoothly. Until then things will be bumpy, meaning, if I disappear for a while, it's not because I've dumped you all, but more because I'm at my wit's end and can't function properly! :D

I still have two decent prospects for a new place, but nothing definite yet. Dale will be home around the 28th and that's when we'll just do a binge look and whatever we find, is what we get. :p

Ok, like I said, short and sweet, I'm so wiped out and plan to sleep again most of tomorrow, but I hope you all enjoy your weekend and have a great week ahead. :D ~ Samantha

Dani
August 17th, 2008, 06:16 PM
Congratulations on the release date!! Bouncy Icon Smilie

I hope you feel better soon!

hollie
August 17th, 2008, 06:30 PM
September :notworthy: I like September if I say it often enough it will get here quicker ... please

Oh sorry got side tracked I will be more than happy to celabrate with you my kids go back to school about then Bouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon Smilie

Samantha Lucas
August 19th, 2008, 10:45 PM
September :notworthy: I like September if I say it often enough it will get here quicker ... please

Oh sorry got side tracked I will be more than happy to celabrate with you my kids go back to school about then Bouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon Smilie

ROFLMAO

And man did I need to laugh! So thank you. :D

Dani
August 20th, 2008, 12:01 AM
September :notworthy: I like September if I say it often enough it will get here quicker ... please

Oh sorry got side tracked I will be more than happy to celabrate with you my kids go back to school about then Bouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon Smilie
I have to rub it in...

Mine goes back tomorrow!!! :clap:

Bouncy Icon SmilieWooHoo! Yippie! Thank the Lord! Where's the tequilla? Laugh it Up fuzball

Can you tell it's been a long summer at my house? :whistling:

Samantha Lucas
August 24th, 2008, 12:02 PM
Next week is going to be an interesting week. Dale comes home Wednesday night --YAY!!!-- and we are going to spend Friday and Saturday looking at places to live. Reality is, we won't have a second opportunity, so we are going to have to just take the best we see that we can afford and leave it at that.

Now upside is, by this time next week, I'll probably know what my new home will look like, but honestly I'm concerned about finding something in our current price range. Timing being what it is both Dale's and my income is at an all time low at the moment. Upside to that is when it inevitably goes back up, we'll be locked in at the low end for rent, so maybe I'll see Disney World by Christmas after all. :D

I can do small and squishy for Disney World. lol Really I'm not all that picky, there are four things I need in a place to live in it happily, sunlight, a garden space (balcony is fine so long as there's actually room to sit out on it) a workable kitchen and a sanctuary in the bedroom, having my own attached bath is the one huge luxury want, but if we go mobile home, I'll probably get it. :D

I think our best options at the moment, are a 3/2 mobile home sitting on 2 acres in the country and a 3/1 apartment in the city right by where I used to live, so oldest would be close to all his friends and I know he'd love that.

Now on that note, here's the conundrum. Z is going to turn 18 in Oct. He's not ready to move out, he's not really even talking about it, but the possibility is obviously there, so I'm not sure I want to take an apartment in the city, since my primary reason for doing that, would be to keep Z near his church and friends, when he may very well up and move out, leaving me in an apartment in the city, for no reason. :p

On the other hand, if I took the place in the country, it would be very difficult for him to get back and forth (he doesn't have a car yet) and I can see that pushing him out of the nest faster and quite possibly before he's ready.

Now granted, he's a big boy and needs to make his own decisions and mistakes, but at the same time, I'm a mom and I can't not think of these things. And to be entirely honest, I'm about 100% torn between the two. I love the idea and the sense of peace living in the country provides, but I also love the convenience of being in the city...torn torn torn. sigh

You know what I find sad and interesting about looking for rental property right now, is that so many houses I've found are either rent to own, or else you can simply tell this house was their own and they are probably about to lose it or else they haven't been able to sell it, so they've decided to rent.

I say this because it seems there are an awful lot of homes out there for rent right now with granite counter tops, hardwood floors, multiple fireplaces and even koi ponds in the yard. I've rented houses all my adult life, that doesn't sound like a rental to me! Too bad we can't afford any of them :p

So anyway, that's it on the moving front, should be news next week though so keep your fingers crossed. :)

In weight loss news, I suck. :p Remember how last week I refused to look at that one pound loss as muscle loss? Well this week I've gained 2 pounds...all muscle! YAY me!!!

Honestly, right now, I'm just trying to keep from stress eating and gaining ten pounds before we move. I know this will sound cheesy, but I feel like I'm waiting for this move for my whole life to start back up again.

Even my writing has been waaaaaay off the past six months. When I moved in here, this was supposed to be a two month temporary situation while we looked for a house for our whole family. Now I don't regret for one second moving in with Dale, that is truly the most wonderful man on the planet (his ex is insane imho lol) anyway, not the point, so I've been living in temporary mode for 6 months now, and I'm so ready for life again. Just in time for the holidays too!

That's really it for this week, my mind is completely absorbed by this move right now. I hope you all have a great week and check back next week and see what we found! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/wink8.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/?action=view&current=wink8.gif)

Dani
August 24th, 2008, 05:49 PM
Finally, you get to look for a place seriously! LOL! If it were me, I'd take the country place. With all that room you could have a garden and wouldn't have to give up any pets. I know about the convenience of being in the city, but I've been out in the country for most of my life and I'd choose it any day over the city just for the peace and quite if nothing else. :biggrin:

Samantha Lucas
August 24th, 2008, 11:13 PM
Believe me, I personally am leaning heavy that way. My oldest is just freaking out cause I haven't had a driver's license most of his life...this was a very petty thing where my ex got his suspended and I knew if I had one, I'd become the chauffeur...I know I'm horrible, but anyway, I never renewed mine, so when I tell him we'll have a car (or a blue pick-up which is what I've set my mind on lol) he doesn't quite believe me.

I can't entirely blame him, his dad is the kind of person FULL of empty promises and so Z's experienced that all his life. I've been realizing how much I have to prove myself to both my kids, so they know it hasn't been me all these years. It's crazy! It feels really good to prove it to myself too. :D

Dani
August 24th, 2008, 11:46 PM
Oh, I so know the feeling!! I'll have to tell you one day about my ex. LOL!

hollie
August 25th, 2008, 07:24 AM
I'd go with the country as well you couldn't pay me enough to live in a city and I don't drive either so I know how that feels. My aunt has just moved her family from the south coast to near here, both my cousins are in uni but they still whine when the are home but at that age you can't please them no matter what you do

Samantha Lucas
August 25th, 2008, 10:52 AM
Very true Hollie, and to be honest, I think I am coming to grips with the fact, that I need to be looking at this as where will Alec (youngest spawn lol) and I be happy.

Because truthfully when I think of it, Dale's on the road all but maybe one week a month, so he's not here. If he's not here, his kids aren't here. Z splits his time between my place and his dad's and truth be told, he'll be 18 very soon and can move out completely.

OMG It would be sooooo like me to find a place he liked, then have him move out two weeks later. :right:

So I'm finding a place for me and Alec and I'm looking at it as a four year commitment. After that I'm off to Florida and my friend Kevin's old apartment with the 12 foot ceilings and tree lined streets with the drippy moss hanging off them...sigh

Dani
August 25th, 2008, 01:09 PM
Okay, let me get this straight, you're going to get a place there now and in four years (I'm guessing that's when Alec turns 18) you're coming to (as in moving to) Florida? Does Dale agree with this plan?

Yes, I am VERY nosey!! Laugh it Up fuzball

Samantha Lucas
August 25th, 2008, 03:50 PM
Okay, let me get this straight, you're going to get a place there now and in four years (I'm guessing that's when Alec turns 18) you're coming to (as in moving to) Florida? Does Dale agree with this plan?

Yes, I am VERY nosey!! Laugh it Up fuzball

Oh I told him the plan and he was welcome to come, but I'm going! LMAO I told Alec he could come too, I'm not being exclusive. Everyone can come!!!! smilies/balsmilies.g

Samantha Lucas
August 25th, 2008, 03:57 PM
Okay, I found it. As close to the dream home as anyone could get on this budget. lol

It's a doublewide mobile home 3bed 2 bath on 2 acres on a 25 acre farm with a freaking stream in the backyard!!!

It has a fireplace and a shed which is so beyond my wildest dreams I can't tell you! It has a huge round tub in the master bath and a built in booth kinda thing in the kitchen for eating.

I've only seen the photos so far, but it looks perfect. Dale and I go see it on Thurs, but Kristen told me there were already a couple of other serious lookers too. :(

Go away! smilies/1poke.gif

MINE!!!

So anyway, she seemed excited that I wrote romance novels and seemed to like me too, so fingers crossed all good thoughts appreciated! I really wasn't expecting to find a place I was excited about, I expected to find a place that would do fine, so now I'm anxious and nervous and have no idea how I'm going to make it to Thursday!

hollie
August 25th, 2008, 07:28 PM
sounds great but i could do with 4 bed

Dani
August 25th, 2008, 08:29 PM
I have my fingers and toes crossed for you! I'd cross my eyes, but then I'd have a lot of problems getting things done. LOL!

Samantha Lucas
August 25th, 2008, 09:04 PM
sounds great but i could do with 4 bed

Well to be honest so could I...5 actually, but in my reality the budget currently does not stretch that far...I hate reality. :p

Samantha Lucas
August 25th, 2008, 09:06 PM
I have my fingers and toes crossed for you! I'd cross my eyes, but then I'd have a lot of problems getting things done. LOL!

Thanks!

My friend Kevin told me earlier he had more things crossed for me then he did for himself when he switched jobs a few months back. lol

Samantha Lucas
August 30th, 2008, 10:37 AM
No news yet, but we're supposed to hear by later today...if we don't get this place, I may walk out the door, head to Florida and panhandle for a living!

I'll let you all know when I do, but omg I'm SO nervous!:needhug:

hollie
August 30th, 2008, 11:22 AM
i got everything crossed for you

Dani
August 30th, 2008, 02:51 PM
No news yet, but we're supposed to hear by later today...if we don't get this place, I may walk out the door, head to Florida and panhandle for a living!

I'll let you all know when I do, but omg I'm SO nervous!:needhug:
HugMeBig hugs for you!! I hope you get very good news. :lovepounce:

Samantha Lucas
August 30th, 2008, 04:33 PM
We didn't get it, they rented to a friend, Florida here I come!

Dani
August 30th, 2008, 04:46 PM
*&%$!!! Well, welcome to Florida honey!!

hollie
August 30th, 2008, 04:51 PM
i'm not sure if i should say i'm sorry or congratulations so i'll say both

Samantha Lucas
August 30th, 2008, 09:51 PM
You guys are sweet, I'm totally devastated, but Dale took me out for a prime rib dinner, bought me some ibuprofen --my head is killing me :p-- and bought me the latest Sims2 expansion...so I'm staying put for the moment.

Freaking hell though, now I need to start looking all over again. :P

SHOOT ME! :gun_bandana:

Samantha Lucas
August 31st, 2008, 11:54 AM
Wow what a topsy turvy week!

Dale's been home which of course is the best part of everything, we had some housing drama that isn't entirely settled yet but probably will be by later this afternoon YIKES! =O

I don't want to say too much because it's all up in the air still, but I will say 5 bedroom farmhouse in the country! This is a two part story that has to do with the place we looked at Friday that we did not get :( but if this works out, this is real life perfect, not best I can expect right now perfect.

Oh my goodness, I'm still in shock!

Thing is, in all honesty, I'm not sure how much strength or sanity I have left for life. I'm wore out, I want to just be home. I want to cook and write and finish my kid's education. I want to garden and think and pray and RELAX. I'm so hoping this is it, because I can picture myself living the rest of my life in this place. Seriously, it's that perfect.

I'm going to share a little story that contains very naughty language...bad Kevin http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/slap/slap-1.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/slap/?action=view&current=slap-1.gif)

So yesterday, after finding out we didn't get the best place I thought we'd ever get on our budget --has anyone seen what's happened to rental prices lately? OMG!!!-- anyway, so after we didn't get it, I was devastated. I also hadn't slept more than a few hours in days, I hadn't eaten in a day and a half and lets just say I got the teeeeeeeniest bit hysterical. http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/blush/Crazy_blush_tweetz.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/blush/?action=view&current=Crazy_blush_tweetz.gif)

I mean, I saw my kids living with their dad, and me in a tiny one bedroom apartment somewhere with 40 cats and four jobs and certainly no writing! By the end of the day, I may have completely lost touch with reality. ooops

So anyway, what does Dale do?

Dump me like any normal sane person would have?

NO!!!

He takes me out for prime rib, buys me ibuprofen --I had the worst headache-- and the latest Sims2 expansion that just came out!!!!!

OH

MY

GOD

Who is this man?????

So I ask my friend Kevin "What do you think is wrong with him?!"

Kevin answers back...."I say this with all the love and affection as our friendship holds....SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GO FUCK HIS BRAINS OUT, YOU'VE FOUND THE ONE!!!!!"

I think he's right. How on earth did I get so lucky?

Ok, one last thing for today, because I have a ton of things to do before we go see the farmhouse this afternoon, but I do have a new book out on Tuesday. This is the first book I've had out in five months and for over a year now I'd been having a book out about every month, so this has been a long dry spell for me.

I know I have some loyal readers and I'm hoping you all are looking as forward to this as I am, but what makes this release even more wonderful, is it's the second book out that's honestly me. Me to the core, the type of story that comes from my heart, the type of story I know I'm meant to tell and I am so hoping my readers will embrace it. :D

I've made a trailer and posted an excerpt on my site (http://samanthalucas.com/books.php?title=untamable), and for today, I've posted an extended excerpt on my blog (http://samanthalucas.com/blog/). It's the only place you'll see that excerpt, so I hope you drop by and read.

Before I go, I'm going to give you a little taste, if you want the rest, click over to my site and don't forget to check out the second excerpt on my blog (http://samanthalucas.com/blog/) http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/Winkingsmileyanimated.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/?action=view&current=Winkingsmileyanimated.gif)

Enjoy the rest of your Sunday, keep good thoughts for our farmhouse, and as always thanks for spending part of it with me. :D ~ Samantha

**Excerpt contains adult language

<style type="text/css"> <!-- @page { size: 8.5in 11in; margin: 0.79in } P { margin-bottom: 0.08in } --> </style>
“Harlee.”



He said it in concession as he walked past her table without even a glance. In only a moment, he would be gone. Her heart would start working properly, and she’d be able to breathe again. But she had to admit—to herself at the very least—she’d also be miserable. So on a sharp breath she called after him, “Rhys.”



He stopped with his back to her. She watched the muscles bunch under his shirt, the tension radiating through his shoulders. For a few seconds she wondered if he would simply bolt, without a word. She sighed out of pure frustration. Finally, he turned around and faced her. The desire she saw reflected in his eyes mirrored her own. She was sure of it, but that wasn’t the point, she wanted to find some comfortable ground with this man who would inevitably be a part of her life.



“Sit with me a while?”



She made the offer softly, with hope and maybe a little fear that he’d accept it. The bottom line was they needed to get past this. “Please?”



Rhys stood staring down at her. Her bright green eyes, filled with such entreaty, were killing him. How was it possible he could be such a soft touch after all he’d been through? Why was it not possible simply to walk away from her? The bottom line, of course, was that he didn’t want to sit with her; he wanted to fuck her—repeatedly, until neither of them could move. ...Read the rest here (http://samanthalucas.com/books.php?title=untamable)!

hollie
August 31st, 2008, 04:50 PM
fingers crossed for the farm house 5 bed would be bliss i would kill for 4 beds but 5 would mean non of the kids would have to share. I hope it works out for you.

Oh and I so need this book Bouncy Icon Smilie

Samantha Lucas
August 31st, 2008, 11:06 PM
Hollie, you've made my night! :D

Anyway, as for the house...the mobile home we went to see the other day, we didn't get because a friend of the owners, who'd previously said they didn't want to rent the mobile home, changed her mind and did, so of course they gave it to her.

That being said, I guess Kristin just really liked us and she called this morning and asked if we'd be at all interested in renting the main house!!!!

So that's where we went. The property, which in it's entirety is a 25 acre farm, apparently went through a couple of owners who couldn't care less about the place and it had become worn down. Kristin and her husband have been trying to fix it up, but they live full time about four hours from here and just don't get down all that often. So anyway, she refused to rent it to us until we saw the inside, so off we went.


It's a hundred year old farm house, and it's HUGE. It is what you'd call a fixer, but they weren't planning on renting it. It sits on a 5 acre parcel of the 25 acres, has a wood burning stove that heats the whole place, well water, they are going to completely redo the instillation, and put in a whole new kitchen before we move in. (Wait, it's not quite a done deal)

Everyone gets their own bedroom,
I get an office!!!!! :omg_2:

and there is a huge room upstairs the kids can use as a hang out with all the video game equipment and such so it's not all over my lovely living room. Plus Dale and I have already decided we're buying the place as soon as they are ready to sell.

This house has amazing bones. I LOVE this house. I want to live in this house the rest of my life!!!!

The only bad part, is that nothing's official yet. :tear: She wanted us to take some time to think about it, then get back with her, but I already e-mailed her tonight saying we love the place. So keep those fingers crossed just a teeny bit longer. Beggin' Smilie

Dani
September 1st, 2008, 01:02 AM
OMG!! Fingers, toes and everything else I can cross are crossed for you!! I hope it's a done deal and you get to move in soon! HugMe

Oh and Kevin's definitely right about what he said. You are one lucky woman. LOL! :biggrin:

hollie
September 1st, 2008, 06:41 AM
oh wow i got everything crossed for you

Samantha Lucas
September 2nd, 2008, 03:23 AM
Still no word, my stomach is in knots, and I have to do a ton of promo for Untamable today!

ACK!!!!!!

Right now though, I'm going to bed!

hollie
September 2nd, 2008, 03:32 AM
good luck today Samantha Bouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon Smilie

now i'm going to take my kids to school I'll be back in a bit

Samantha Lucas
September 4th, 2008, 02:13 AM
Looks like a no go on the farmhouse, I think they got an offer to sell it outright, but I'll know more in a few days...IF I DON'T JUMP OFF A BRIDGE FIRST!!! :P

hollie
September 4th, 2008, 04:07 AM
oh no hope you find something soon

klmc37
September 4th, 2008, 11:03 AM
Hope you get it. Sounds like a real nice place.

Dani
September 4th, 2008, 09:21 PM
Looks like a no go on the farmhouse, I think they got an offer to sell it outright, but I'll know more in a few days...IF I DON'T JUMP OFF A BRIDGE FIRST!!! :P
You just need to move down here to Kevin's place and have a blast. LOL! I really hope that things work out with this though.

Samantha Lucas
September 7th, 2008, 12:39 AM
The farmhouse didn't work out. They sold the 19acre meadow and part of the deal is that the people get to live in the farmhouse while they build themselves a house on the 19 acres. :p

I've spent the last few days, devastated and scrambling but we're out of time and options for the moment...anyway, I'm dead beat, but I'll update everyone tomorrow.

hollie
September 7th, 2008, 08:25 AM
oh Samantha I'm so sorry I hope it works out for you soon

Samantha Lucas
September 7th, 2008, 11:05 AM
I am unbelievably tired and I have an entire house to pack today, so this will be unlike my usual long rambles to nowhere. lol

First, I want to thank everyone who's responded in the forums, emailed me, commented on my blog and watched the video for Untamable. You all have made me incredibly happy that this book was so well received. Hopefully there will be plenty more stories coming soon. I am in edits right now on a release from Cobblestone, a romantic suspense called Legacy of Fear. So keep your eyes open for that one.

Okay, now on to life...:p

Our beautiful farmhouse fell through. http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/sad/sad.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/sad/?action=view&current=sad.gif) Apparently the people renting it had the opportunity to sell their 19 acre meadow parcel, but the people buying it are needing to stay in the farmhouse while they build their own house on the meadow...doesn't that sound beautiful?

A house on the meadow. sigh

Ok so anyway, back to my plight. ;-P

Dale came home yesterday and we've had a long serious talk about the future... and I'm dumping him...KIDDING!!!

We really did have a long talk though and I'm so amazed by how freaking compatible we are. We've never had a fight...ok every once in a while if he's late taking his pain meds, he does get grouchy, but that's hardly a fight. I just say, hey have you taken your meds? He blames me for not reminding him and all is better. http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/laughing/smilie_happy_251.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/laughing/?action=view&current=smilie_happy_251.gif)

So we talked about our future, things we want, things we don't and made some really big decisions. I love that man...that had nothing to do with anything, just love him :) We are both completely burned out and unmotivated for this move. I think because we are both sick and tired of living by someone else's whims, so we've decided to buy rather than rent. We both decided that this next move, is permanent and in order for that to work, we're starting off by putting everything in storage, my boys are going to spend three weeks with their dad, and I'm hitting the open highway with Dale. http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/shock/4_11_1.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/shock/?action=view&current=4_11_1.gif)

At first, honestly I laughed myself silly at the idea, but then I thought, I'd been wanting to go out on the road with him anyway, and then he threw in, for the next three weeks, we'll go a bit more into touristy mode and stop longer and see the cities. Plus he promised me if we get anywhere near Mark, Kevin, Shonna, or Disney World, we'd definitely stop!

Did I mention that I love him?

Anybody else want me to come visit? :D

I also got a new comfy wardrobe out of this deal. lol Ooooh and that portable internet thingee too...haven't tried it out yet, but should be fun. :)

So for the next few weeks this will be Sundays on the Road with Samantha! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/laughing/smilie_happy_251.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/laughing/?action=view&current=smilie_happy_251.gif) I'm going to take pictures too!! I'm actually, truth be told at this point, starting to get excited about the idea. I hate not seeing my kids for a couple weeks, but that's just the mom in me, I love that my ex is going to be saddled with all our cats though. lol
Do you know he had the nerve to ask me if I was going to pay him child support!!! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/mad/hissy.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/mad/?action=view&current=hissy.gif) Ok, so maybe I should be grateful that he threw seventy five bucks my way a couple weeks ago, but freaking hell, is he serious??!!

Anyway, other than that, I think this is going to be a lot of fun. http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/happy/th118E61117.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/happy/?action=view&current=th118E61117.gif) I can't wait to find out where we're headed first!

Thanks for checking in, hope you all have a great weekend and anyone wanting to come help me pack, is more than welcome! :D See you all next Sunday...from the road!!!

hollie
September 7th, 2008, 02:40 PM
I'd say visit me but it's a bit far lol the break might do you good and hopefully when you get back you will find a house

Dani
September 7th, 2008, 05:29 PM
I'm so sorry about you not getting the place. That totally sucks! :( Maybe you being out on the road with Dale will help you find a place and area that you'll love.

You're more than welcome to come meet up with me if you're near me in Florida. Although, since that's close to Disney, I'll probably have to come over there to see you. Laugh it Up fuzball

It's a typical male to ask for child support. It's only for three weeks that he's keeping them, so tell him that he can take off three weeks of money if it's that important to him. I know that will probably be hard on you, but at least he can't complain that way. A piece of advice though, if you decide to buy something in another state, make sure that he can't stop you from leaving with the kids. I know a guy that stopped his ex-wife from moving out of FL with their two kids. I was shocked, but she made due with not moving (I can tell you that she was one pissed off woman though).

Samantha Lucas
September 8th, 2008, 01:36 AM
Well, I'm very thankful that for the most part, my ex and I get on fine. It's only when child support comes up, and that's primarily because he NEVER pays it! That pisses me off. I mean, Dale works his ass off to support two families and my ex gets off scott free, seriously drives me up the wall.

But anyway, my oldest will be 18 in four weeks and the youngest is old enough to run away from home if he wanted. lol So I don't think it'll be an issue. :p

And I do think the break will do me good, I'm seriously loosing it! :err:

Dani
September 8th, 2008, 10:29 PM
Well then, it's a good thing that you get along.

I know about not paying child support. My ex was bad at it. I'm not saying anymore here because it would be rude, but I'll email ya sometime about him. LOL!

Samantha Lucas
September 9th, 2008, 02:15 PM
I know what you mean, I try to be careful not to forget where I am and post too much, especially about the ex. :p

What is it about packing that seems like no matter how hard you work at it and how much you get done, there's like these moving fairies (NOT THE GOOD KIND) who come along behind you creating more and more and more???

OMG THIS WILL NEVER END!!!

Sheesh, and we have to be gone by tonight, I may kill someone before this is all over. Superman had kryptonite, I have moving. UGH

Dani
September 9th, 2008, 08:19 PM
Laugh it Up fuzball I know EXACTLY how you feel! It never gets easier either and I hate that. I've been tempted to just chunk everything and start over, but then I think about how much that would cost and say never mind.

hollie
September 10th, 2008, 05:33 AM
Thats what I wanted to do when we moved into this house but my mum wouldn't let me... I would have moved the big stuff just left all the junk that gets collected

Samantha Lucas
September 11th, 2008, 06:26 PM
OMG seriously you guys, I was sick watching all this junk go into storage. I kept saying, why do we want to store that?

And Dale kept answering, we don't have time to sort it now...which was true, so I say then lets just chuck it and start over!

Besides my oldest's bed, and only because I just bought that, I'm really not certain there's anything else in there I'd be heartbroken to lose...how sad is that? I mean I'll be 42 in a couple weeks, and I have nothing I care about, my entire life can be reduced to a small crate and a duffel bag and I'm totally fine...sheesh

That just seems wrong somehow. :p

hollie
September 11th, 2008, 06:31 PM
I'm the same every year whe they start talking about flooding I move my photo's and books upstairs anything else can be replaced so i'm not bothered

Samantha Lucas
September 11th, 2008, 06:46 PM
I know, it's so ridiculous, you spend half your life in pursuit of all this stuff, then you really don't care about it when you get it. sigh

Samantha Lucas
September 11th, 2008, 06:49 PM
I've decided I'm on a journey of self discovery and redefining who I am. I think to really do this right, I need to be fairly quiet in most of the usual places for a little while (with the exception of Sundays with Samantha and the Disney thread ;) I can't not talk about Disney lol) but if you want to keep up with my journey, I'll be making daily posts on my introspection blog (http://samanthasinsights.blogspot.com/) and you're welcome to join me. ;)

Here's a glimpse at today's post, click the link at the end for the full post. TTFN ~ Samantha


Day one on the road...or as I've come to think of it, my midlife crisis gone haywire!

I've packed up my entire life into boxes, packed it all in storage, left children, cats, and a few assorted plants with ex (youngest is not real happy with this arrangement) and have hit the road in a cargo van, with my boyfriend.

When did I become a college senior????

Ah well, here I am. I've committed to three weeks so we can catch up on bills and build some saving for a down payment on a house, and if we can all make it two months, life could very possibly be golden.

Read the full post and all additional posts here (http://samanthasinsights.blogspot.com/). ;)

Dani
September 11th, 2008, 08:33 PM
Boy, it's going to be quiet around here then, but well worth it for you to find what you need out of life. Good luck with that! Lord knows I probably need to. Laugh it Up fuzball

Samantha Lucas
September 12th, 2008, 11:17 AM
True, but to be honest, I don't think I was including here. I'm dropping off the radar on some of the publisher forums and group blogs I'm on, stuff like that, more of a pulling back then disappearing all together. :)

Dani
September 12th, 2008, 11:31 AM
Oh good! At least we'll get an update every day or two then. :biggrin:

Samantha Lucas
September 13th, 2008, 06:01 AM
This is just real quick...we got our first load, we're headed for Jersey, then New York on Monday! Woohoo!!!

More later...

hollie
September 13th, 2008, 06:55 AM
Oh Samantha try and get picky's so I can see all the places you go one day I will get to america but not any time soon

Samantha Lucas
September 13th, 2008, 09:00 PM
Well I did bring my camera, and I do hope to get pics, but I forgot the cable that uploads them to my laptop. UGH I'm hoping to find a replacement along the way somewhere though.

Dani
September 13th, 2008, 10:12 PM
Good luck! :biggrin:

Samantha Lucas
September 14th, 2008, 10:42 AM
Other than I'm grouchy right now because I couldn't sleep last night and it's already humid this morning and I've been told will hit 90 today...http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/sick/smilie_krank_142.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/sick/?action=view&current=smilie_krank_142.gif)...life on the road isn't bad. I'm also having battery issues with the laptop, so this will be brief.

Well, I'm here. We spent the better part of last week, packing and storing everything we own, and OMG do we own a lot of junk! I have to admit though, I was amazed at Dale's ability to squish a bunch of stuff into a very teeny space!

At the same time, I just kept thinking, "we're storing that??!!"

Oh well, maybe when this is all said and done, I can just buy new everything and let them set a torch to the storage building! lmao

We're in Jersey now, arrived yesterday after driving through West Virginia, Maryland, and an adorable part of Pennsylvania. I need some kind of map that tells me what rivers we're crossing! Aren't the supposed to have signs??!! SHEESH

Anyway, we're here through today and then pick-up a new load first thing tomorrow and head for New York with that, the Buffalo area, I think. I haven't seen or done much other than try to catch up on sleep and get acclimated. I have good and bad moments, leaving my boys was the worst though. I know they're 14 and 18 and more than capable of surviving on their own, but I'm a mom, it killed me to drive away. Especially since they're father in in NO way an adult! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/mad/uberangry.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/mad/?action=view&current=uberangry.gif) I won't even go into the kind of condition I found his place in, all I will say is I'm glad their grandmother lives across the street.

OK, now my damn blood pressure is up. http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/sick/smilie_krank_105.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/sick/?action=view&current=smilie_krank_105.gif)

Anyway, good thoughts sent this way is greatly appreciated. As excited as I am for the adventure part of this, there is still SO much of the home life that needs settled and I'm not even sure where to start. http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/tongue/TONGUE22111.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/tongue/?action=view&current=TONGUE22111.gif)

All right, that's it for this BRIEF Sunday check in, but I'll try and get some pictures for next week, although I stupidly packed the cord that uploads the photos from the camera, so I'll have to see if I can find a new one.

Take care, enjoy your weekend and hug your kids! See you next week ~ Samantha

hollie
September 14th, 2008, 12:00 PM
Try and have fun Samantha things have got to start picking up soon

Dani
September 14th, 2008, 10:46 PM
I'm sure things will get better for you soon. It's always hard the first few days, trust me. I had to leave my son for 10 days once for medical treatment (his not mine) and it killed me, so I know how you feel.

Samantha Lucas
September 19th, 2008, 08:27 AM
You were both right. Those first few days were definitely the hardest. Now I'm having the time of my life! Bouncy Icon Smilie This will be sort of quick, but I wanted to say hi and let you know we are alive and well. :) We're in Michigan at the moment, but we've already been to New Jersey, West Virginia and Kentucky! We haven't sat even one day without a load so that's fabulous, we should be able to catch up faster than we thought if this holds.

Dale and I think that perhaps a lot of truckers quit through that slow spell and now that freight is picking up, there aren't enough people to handle it all. We ran three loads yesterday! Anyway, we're number 5 to go out today, so I'm hoping we do, I'd love to get stuck in Chicago over the weekend though because there's a church there I've always wanted to go to.

My boys are doing well from what I can tell. Again, I think the first couple days were the worst. I got a call from my youngest that had me in hysterical tears all night and plotting how to walk home from Delaware! But the next day I was told by said youngest...and I quote..."So you had another mom over reaction to something completely innocent." :err:

SHEESH!

Z calls me about every other night, I'll be glad to get home to them, but I'm glad they are there for each other. Alec's still not thrilled in the least, but at least they are both old enough to understand why we're doing this. That we're trying to provide a better life for everyone. I'm not just ditching them to go on a road trip with my boyfriend, you know? I'm being careful not to make too many promises, but when I get back, I intend to show them this was worth it. :)

It's freakingly amazing how well Dale and I get on together. I swear, I can't imagine too many people being able to live under such close quarters, under each other's foot 24/7 and not get annoyed with it. Dale and I are loving this. I haven't even once thought oh good grief, just shut up already! LOL He's such a good man and being out here, he's had to take care of me in ways I never would have seen otherwise. I love him more every day and what's even better, is I'm learning that it's okay to trust him, he's not going to drop me. I needed to know that, and I think perhaps this was God's way of showing me, coz I'm not sure I would have gotten it this deep in any other situation. :)

Ok I've got about four more emails to return and edits to finish, I thought I'd be spending a lot more time on line than I have, but you know, I haven't missed it one bit! I'm usually attached surgically to the laptop. LOL This is a very nice break and I'm learning so much about myself, my kids, Dale, and my friends though it. I was panicked at the thought of hitting the road, now I think it may be the best thing I've ever done. :)

Talk to you all later! :rockon:

Dani
September 19th, 2008, 04:35 PM
That's excellent Samantha!! :huepfen017: I told you that you'd be fine and have fun. It's great that this was an eye opener for you too. Sometimes that's all it takes (says ye with little faith right now...LOL). Good luck on the rest of your trip! :biggrin:

Samantha Lucas
September 21st, 2008, 11:33 AM
WOW what a week! We drove about 2000 miles, hit a half dozen states and met a bunch of great people. OMG this is so much fun!

I've seen horses, cows, pigs, sheep, llamas and emus! I am in love with Hillsdale Michigan! I'd move tomorrow if Dale didn't have me all freaked out over the winters up here. LOL We ate at a truck stop yesterday, they actually served me my Pepsi in a pitcher with a straw! OMG all restaurants should do that!!!

Some of the things that are different then I expected...I hardly ever get on my laptop, which is surreal at this point. I'm even having to do edits over the phone, also weird. Sleeping in the bunk with Dale isn't as squishy as I thought. I mean we're sleeping in a twin size bed, I thought "no way" but it's fine. Actually it's been real nice. ;-) The showers at the truck stops, also not at all what I thought they'd be. A couple have been nicer then any home bathroom I've ever been in!

I think the hardest thing is the sitting. We haven't done too much of it, except for on the weekends, and it just makes me incredibly antsy! But Dale and I have been building dreams and sharing our lives and laughing a lot. I miss my kids, but they really seem to be doing all right. Of course they never call! Damn teens :p What, like they have a life or something??!! SHEESH lol

I swear the economy of this country is a hot topic all over, people are scared and pissed off. I'm not usually around people this much, so it's been fascinating to hear opinions and what people are passionate about. It is scary though and quite frankly this buy out of the government pisses me off too,coz they've never once bailed me out!

Okay okay, I do understand the reasons and all, but I'm already broke, I can't afford to take on more debt and who else is going to pay for this?

All right, enough political talk. :p

Personally, I find myself struggling with trust and faith and my own self worth. God issues are huge, I used to walk so close to him, but the last decade, I've been drifting further and further away, I need to decide what's right for me and make some severe changes.

Then, there's the fact that I've essentially dropped off the face of the planet and it made no difference, not even a tiny ripple, and I'm not sure how I feel about that. Being shy, I like living a quiet life, but at the same time, I'd like to know I count for something. I don't know, I'm chasing around a lot of heavy thoughts right now. My whole life is in flux, but I think when I come through the other side, it's going to be a beautiful thing. ;)

Enjoy your Sunday, see you next week ~ Samantha

Dani
September 21st, 2008, 07:17 PM
Hey now, I miss you! You're not on everyday posting so I notice. LOL!

Samantha Lucas
September 22nd, 2008, 07:45 AM
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Thank you. :D

It's just, my birthday's tomorrow and I seem to be throwing myself a pity party rather than birthday party. :p I can't get a hold of my kids, they've apparently turned the ringer off on the cell phone, which I'm sure was on accident, but the fact they haven't heard from me in four days and haven't even bothered to see if I'm DEAD or not, is bugging me!

On top of that, I just feel so directionless this year and it's the first year I can remember where I feel like I've gone backwards rather than forwards and that frustrates the hell out of me. :p

Ugh...sorry, early morning rant. :sorry:

hollie
September 22nd, 2008, 10:23 AM
rant away sweetie it's all good and if your boys where as concerned as parents need them to be I would be worryed they about them you have teenagers they arn't supposed to think about you untill they want something or realize something hasn't been done with teens no news is good news ( can you tell I have one as well but mines a girl)

Dani
September 22nd, 2008, 05:40 PM
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Thank you. :D

It's just, my birthday's tomorrow and I seem to be throwing myself a pity party rather than birthday party. :p I can't get a hold of my kids, they've apparently turned the ringer off on the cell phone, which I'm sure was on accident, but the fact they haven't heard from me in four days and haven't even bothered to see if I'm DEAD or not, is bugging me!

On top of that, I just feel so directionless this year and it's the first year I can remember where I feel like I've gone backwards rather than forwards and that frustrates the hell out of me. :p

Ugh...sorry, early morning rant. :sorry:
It will turn out for the best. Your boys will be in touch, but right now they're probably liking their freedom from mom. I mean even though they miss you (and I'm sure they do) it's nice to get away from mom sometimes. I'll bet that their dad's not making them do much, so it's like a vacation for them too. I'm probably not making this any better and I'm sorry, but it's how I felt when my mom and stepdad went off without me.

Samantha Lucas
September 22nd, 2008, 08:34 PM
Thank you both!

I heard from them tonight and they were, "it's just been two days and the battery died and I never noticed." Then we argued over whether it's been two days or FOUR then they faked a couple of oh yeah, miss you toos, and that was it!

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I do remember what it was like to be 18 and out on my own for the first time. I was too caught up in all the new experiences to remember I had family, somethin I later regretted when my grandmother died soon after :( but anyway, it's just so hard being away from them for so long. I'm afraid things will never be the same, which I suppose they shouldn't...sheesh, maybe I should raise puppies!

hollie
September 23rd, 2008, 06:31 AM
Laugh it Up fuzball if i had thought of it first i might have considered it at least you know they are normal teens

Samantha Lucas
September 23rd, 2008, 06:33 AM
Laugh it Up fuzball if i had thought of it first i might have considered it at least you know they are normal teens

Which is really good considering how ABNORMAL their parents are! LMAO

Dani
September 23rd, 2008, 02:30 PM
You're not abnormal, but I can imagine that their father IS! Laugh it Up fuzball

BTW,
:hapbirth:smilies/champagne2.g:partyhat1:smilies/bigbirthday.
:happytiger:smilies/bday3.gifsmilies/birthdaycakesmilies/champagne3.g

You didn't think that I was going to forget now did you? You might have been wishing it though. LOL! :whistling:

hollie
September 23rd, 2008, 03:58 PM
happy birthday sweetie

ChampagneParty.gif /smilies/birthday.gi :xlbirthday:
smilies/bday3.gif
:surprise:

Samantha Lucas
September 25th, 2008, 10:57 AM
Oh my goodness!!!!!!

Thank you both SOOOOOO much!!!!!!!!!!!!

Huge hugs all around. :)

No one ever remembers my birthday, thank you thank you thank you!!!!!!

Dani
September 25th, 2008, 11:20 AM
Well we remembered! I hope you had a good one. :biggrin:

hollie
September 25th, 2008, 11:28 AM
Dani you did over 8000 posts Bouncy Icon Smilie

Dani
September 25th, 2008, 11:57 AM
Oh yeah!! I hit 8,000 last night on one of Angela Caperton's threads. LOL! I PMed Karenne too and told her that I had more work for her to do since she makes up the awards. She called me a brat! Not like it's not deserved though. Laugh it Up fuzball

hollie
September 25th, 2008, 02:56 PM
I pm'd her to say i get 2 in october (not that i was nagging or anything) :tt2:

Dani
September 25th, 2008, 07:32 PM
LOL! That's right. You get your one year and 3,000 posts awards. WooHoo! :huepfen017:

Samantha Lucas
September 26th, 2008, 08:52 AM
I'm spending my weekend in NEW YORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


OMG I'm totally psyched!!!!

Dani
September 26th, 2008, 10:53 AM
Lucky you!! I want to go there someday. I want to see St. Patrick's Cathedral!! It is so beautiful in pictures and I want to see it up close.

Why does everyone get to do cool things but me!?!?!?!?:hissyfit:

Okay, hissy fit over. LOL!

Samantha Lucas
September 26th, 2008, 06:50 PM
Awwwww :(

Well if it makes you feel any better, we're broke, so I doubt I'll get to see anything really, but I am pushing for Niagara Falls. We're not too far away and unless we get a load first thing tomorrow, that means we'll be here most likely till Monday...so my fingers are a little bit crossed. :)

Oh, but I am in love with Fayettville and Chatanogwa (or something like that lol) I've added those to my places I want to live list.

And so long as I'm here, Michigan has far too many racoons and is every freaking hwy under construction?????

SHEESH

Dani
September 26th, 2008, 07:38 PM
Hopefully you'll get to go! :biggrin:

I do have something fun coming up. On the 10th of October son and I are going with mom to Miami! I haven't been there since I was about 4 yrs old. Cute story about that is my mom told me we were going to Miami and I said, "We're going to your ami?" She said, No, Miami. and I looked back at her and said, "Your ami." I couldn't get the concept of Miami then. I thought it was something of hers because if the Mi part of the name. Laugh it Up fuzball

Samantha Lucas
September 26th, 2008, 08:20 PM
awwwwwww

How fun too!

My friend told me he saw something on the news about them selling off all these 200,000 dollar houses for 50k in Tampa, just to get rid of them coz the market there is so bad.

Then he tells me, but he didn't get any of the info, coz he didn't think I'd be interested. SHEESH!

Dani
September 26th, 2008, 10:35 PM
Is he NUTS???? :whistilin:

That would put you sooooo close to me. You'd have to like it here too though, so that means that you have to come down here and check things out. LOL!

Samantha Lucas
September 27th, 2008, 10:12 AM
LOL

Well the problem Dale and I are finding right now, is that a lot of banks are wanting you to have like a third down before they'll even consider loaning you anything.

Yeah, like we have an extra 30k just laying around. :TroutSlap:

Shonna's trying to get me to move to Alabama, Kevin wants me in SC, but I have to admit, FL has the leading edge, what with Disney being there and everything. LMAO

But what's most likely is I'll end up in a small apartment in Christiansburg, right where I started. PLEH :P

Dani
September 27th, 2008, 03:11 PM
LOL

Well the problem Dale and I are finding right now, is that a lot of banks are wanting you to have like a third down before they'll even consider loaning you anything.

Yeah, like we have an extra 30k just laying around. :TroutSlap:

Shonna's trying to get me to move to Alabama, Kevin wants me in SC, but I have to admit, FL has the leading edge, what with Disney being there and everything. LMAO

But what's most likely is I'll end up in a small apartment in Christiansburg, right where I started. PLEH :P
Well, neither of them (AL and SC) are very far from FL. It's a 4 hour drive from my house to the state line. I've driven to SC and it took me about 5 hours or so to get to the middle of the state, so that's a plus. Alabama is a nice place. My mom wouldn't mind moving there. In fact, I wouldn't mind either. LOL!

hollie
September 27th, 2008, 05:28 PM
i would love to just get out of the uk

Samantha Lucas
September 27th, 2008, 06:08 PM
Awwww :(

And my friend Mark is dying to get back in!

I'm at the point where I honestly am not sure I care anymore about the wheres or whats, I just want a home, a kitchen I can cook in, a garden, and to be surrounded by animals and children. Whether they're my own, foster kids, or grandkids I don't care, I just want to settle down and grow some roots for a change. Beggin' Smilie

hollie
September 27th, 2008, 06:17 PM
I can understand that before we moved to this house we lived in a rough area and everything was unsettled. here we have less space, a smaller garden and can't walk to the shops anymore but we are so much happier.

Your time will come have faith and remember to appreciate the good you need to have the bad first

Samantha Lucas
October 1st, 2008, 11:18 AM
I saw my kids last night!!!!!!!!!!

Bouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon Smilie

hollie
October 1st, 2008, 11:20 AM
thats graet Samantha are they both ok?

Dani
October 1st, 2008, 08:38 PM
I saw my kids last night!!!!!!!!!!

Bouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon Smilie

YAY!!!! :huepfen017: So how are they? Do they miss you loads?

Samantha Lucas
October 1st, 2008, 10:57 PM
Oh yeah they're fine, I think they were even happy to see me, of course they'd never admit to it, but I do think they were. They even let me hug them like a bajillion times! and we joked around, it was fabulous!!!!

Dani
October 1st, 2008, 11:03 PM
Are you going back out on the road, or staying home?

Samantha Lucas
October 1st, 2008, 11:30 PM
Oh I'm already back out, well sort of, we're waiting on a load. We've been running three weeks, but with the lag between driving and getting paid, we'll just see out first check this week. Hopefully we'll start to get caught up now! YAY!

Dani
October 2nd, 2008, 09:57 AM
Cool!! Hopefully things will come together for you, Dale and the kids soon.

Samantha Lucas
October 3rd, 2008, 01:38 PM
So today marks the beginning of week four. I spent my birthday out here, I'm going to miss my baby's 18th birthday, which is next Wednesday, I'll be out here for Halloween (I like halloween :P) but I haven't died. lol

This is such a weird life experience, one that I never could have dreamed for myself, but I'm learning to surrender to the journey, which I think on the whole is a good life lesson.

I've spent much of my life trying to force the journey into the box I want it in, yet when I look back, it's all the times and things I never could have foreseen that bring back the best memories, or that taught me the best lessons.

I'm starting to settle in here, although I crashed really hard last weekend, for about three days I thought, this was it, I've had it, I'm dumping Dale and pleading with my ex to take me back!

OMG if that's not the definition of insanity I don't know what is. It's not that my ex is a bad guy, it's more that we never should have gone from friends to more, because we're not matched, but that's what 20 does. lol

Anyway! ...I do go off on rabbit trails :right:

So anyway, seeing my kids last week helped SO much and I got to see them twice! I saw with my own eyes that they're fine, and that they were actually happy to see me. They're good kids and I love them so much.

I didn't get to rescue those kitties yesterday, which breaks my heart. I talked to a few people at the truck stop, I couldnt find anyone who cared all that much though, so Dale promised me when we come back through (which we will at somepoint in the next few weeks) we'll come back with a kennel and be prepared to catch them. And I fed them tons! So at lest I left them with full stomachs. :eat:

I'm trying to accept that not everything gets done exatly when and the way I want it, but with patience and trust, it still works out. :)

I'm obsessively playing the sims2, obsessively listening to Rihanna and Katy Perry, no clue why, lol I'm about a quarter of the way through my charity sub for Blade and I'm putting on weight!!!!! FREAKING HELL!!!

Like I needed that!

So at the start of my fourth week, realizing and accepting that this is going to be my life for probably another six weeks, I'm making adjustments.

I'm moving from exisitng and getting by, back into living. I'm being more proactive, making adjustmenst and changes that will make the day to day of this more enjoyable, and I'm driving Dale nuts! LMAO I keep telling him I'm getting a puppy. hee hee hee I'm wicked!

He doesn't like dogs much and can you imagine one in such a small space? I mean I see it all the time and if I were out here alone, I probably would, coz they're such good company, but it's just hysterical to see the look on Dale's face every time I say something like, I think I'll get baby blue food bowls for Kada, or when I look up free puppies on-line in the area we're in.

Ok, but I have to give him credit, he's seriosuly the sweetest man on the planet, because I know that if I were actually serious and I needed a dog to survive out here, he'd get me one. He's amazing. I love him more and more every day and being together like this. I'm learning more and more about him and we still laugh like crazy together. I trust him more than I think I have ever trusted anyone and in part that's because being out here has forced me to trust him in ways I might...scratch that, I wouldn't have otherwise.

I swear every newly married couple should be foreced to do this! If you don't kill each other, then your set for life. Laugh it Up fuzball

Things I want (and need) to add this week are exercise, (I actually brought dumbells out here with me and I need to move more, there's too much sitting in this job, drives me insane! :wacko:) I need to stop eating so much as well, but OMG this is like living in a resturaunt! I have some plans for healthier choices though and we're going to try using the cooler again. (but the first time we tried it, it turned into a science experiment :scardey:) I'm also going to cut back on soda and fill in with more water, plus after seeing all these trucks on the road with chickens and cattle and yesterday baby pigs all going to their death, it's making me want to be a vegitarian...seriously. Those pigs yesterday, really got to me. I kept seeing their little pig noses poking through the openings in the truck and that need to save them all took over. I wanted to crash the truck and cry RUN BE FREE!


http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/thhellopig.gif


I've told you all I'm insane, don't act surprised by it!

I also need to write more consistently. I think I'm really finding a groove for that too, which I'm incredibly excited about because my writing has been so hit and miss all year, and I miss it.

That being said, I entered both Untamable and The Day They Met in the Eppies! I have some HUGE competition but to final would be beyond incredible. I'm not sure if I would have done it sitting at home at my desk, but out here on the road, I find myself more easily stepping out of my comfort zone, so I did it. :)

All in all, this is the adventure of a lifetime and I don't want to end up back at home, wishing I'd enjoyed it more or experienced it more. I'm trying to live each moment to the fullest, take it all in and learn everything I can.

I have so many plans for when I get home, and new dreams. Dale and I are talking about becomming foster parents for starters, plus we're talking about having a wedding in the spring, in my new garden, with a honeymoon at Disney of course. lol

I want to stop taking life for granted, and I feel as if I have been, especially lately. I want to remember that each moment is a gift, and I want to live my life with respect and kindness. I'm done harboring ill feelings towards people that have devastated me in the past and I'm done with this spirit of negativity that seems to have settled on me somewhere over the past five years.

I'm doing an excavation of sorts, finding the me I've lost along the path and that's the most exciting adventure of all!

Samantha Lucas
October 4th, 2008, 09:03 PM
And today my hair is short and burgundy...the road does strange things to you!

Dani
October 5th, 2008, 01:39 AM
You're really being adventurous aren't you?

I'm glad that this is opening you up more. I need to do some changing myself. Y'all wanna swing by and pick me up? Maybe I can change out there with ya. Laugh it Up fuzball

Samantha Lucas
October 5th, 2008, 01:14 PM
LOL Yeah after our wild weekend at Disney we'll swing by! :)

It's true though I went in to get something that would blend my growing out highlights and I walked out with burgundy! LMAO

Samantha Lucas
October 5th, 2008, 01:15 PM
I know, I know, I missed last week, but I hit a wall last week and you wouldn't have wanted to hear from me anyway. http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/tongue/TONGUE22111.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/tongue/?action=view&current=TONGUE22111.gif)

I honestly thought I was done by Monday, I was suffering from a major bout of claustrophobia and cabin fever which conspired against me to bring on HUGE depression...it wasn't pretty.

Then Tuesday came and we got a load going home so I got to hug my kids!!! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/happy/th1cb353a84e3f54c4ba093705cf1ca29dc.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/happy/?action=view&current=th1cb353a84e3f54c4ba093705cf1ca29dc.gif)




http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/happy/Dancing.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/happy/?action=view&current=Dancing.gif)
Oh my gosh what a great dose of medicine. I love those boys so much, I can't even tell you. Honestly, they seemed happy to see me, not that they'd admit it and they played it up every time I hugged them, saying things like, "Don't you have to leave now?" or a simple "Help me." LOL They think they're hysterical. I didn't get to see my cat though and I was bummed about that but then at the next truck stop we stayed at I found two young cats (about 4 months in my guess) living in the storm drain and one was injured badly, so I went into save animal mode and by the time we were back on the road again, I was good and happy to be out here again.



We didn't get to save the kitties though. I see strays at pretty much every truck stop, the first night at this one we saw a little orange kitty he was sweet and timid but I just was taken by him, so I tried and tried to pet him, but no luck. Then we got some tuna and salmon and at least I felt better coz I fed him, but then Thursday morning, as I was feeding kitty 1, Kitty 2 showed up.

It's pretty obvious they were brothers, they were very comfortable with each other and while the one was orange with a white nose and belly, the other was all orange, but here's the clincher, kitty 2 was dragging his rear right leg. I mean the leg was dead, it was stretched out behind him and then the paw on the rear left was a bit mangled, but he was still using it some.

So I freaked, I HAD to save these babies. I got more tuna and more salmon and started feeding kitty 2, now he got a lot closer then kitty 1 did, I'm thinking coz it's got to be hard to pounce without good back legs so he was probably a whole lot hungrier, and then it happened...we got a load.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/evil/smiley-1.jpg (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/evil/?action=view&current=smiley-1.jpg)


And it was a good load too, going all the way to Canada about six hundred miles and as we get paid by the mile, we had to go. So I went inside and tried to find an employee who'd take over my rescue mission but no one cared! So I was in tears, I really didn't want to call the authorities because I know that if they could have caught them, in that area, they would have just put him down and outside of his leg, both cats seemed exceptionally healthy. They had clear eyes and nose, their coat was soft and shiny and they weren't completely wild yet, I just didn't want to give up on them.

So Dale calmed me down and pointed out that they'd been out there this long, they'd probably be okay for another few weeks and he promised me when we get back through that area (which we will, it's close to home) we'll come loaded with tuna and a kennel, so we can catch them and get them to the vet.

So that's part one of kitty rescue 2008, I'll let you know what happens in the conclusion, but all good thoughts are welcome!

So anyway, that was that, then I saw my kids one more time before we left! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/happy/th370351b44b4550b4b9503f65c40e030bc.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/happy/?action=view&current=th370351b44b4550b4b9503f65c40e030bc.gif)

Then Thursday night...OMG all kinds of drama happened with Dale and his ex (I can't really go into details, but it was major!) and it's quite possible our entire lives could be changing (in a fabulously wonderful way)before Thanksgiving.

Seriously, it's huge!

Anyway, among all the drama (which I hate to admit it, but I thrive in) I got another 3k written in my wip. It's the story I'm turning in to Blade for their animal charity. It's the same story I was talking about earlier, loosely based on Garden in the Moonlight, this book is about Mike and Lacey two people who grew up together and are convinced the other hates them. The sparks flying between them so far are great and there have been a few very funny moments, but as with all my stories, these people are so lonely and so hurt, that love's the only thing that can heal them and I can't wait to see how it ends!

So we're in Pittsburgh today and driving to Brooklyn overnight to deliver in the morning. Woohoo! NY again! Who knows what this week holds, but I can't wait to find out.

Have a great week ahead and thanks for stopping by! Hugs ~ Samantha

Dani
October 5th, 2008, 01:31 PM
Wow! That's quite a lot to have happen! I hope you do get to catch the kittens. That would help them a lot. :)

Okay, if I had to speculate about this drama I'd say that you two are getting married before Thanksgiving and his ex is giving up custody of his kids to him. Am I close? Laugh it Up fuzball Okay, I'm only kidding, but I was being hopeful for the both of you. I just know that some people don't have very good relations with their ex's and that it can make life a living hell at times. Whatever way this goes, good luck!!

hollie
October 5th, 2008, 01:41 PM
i'm with Dani I hope you both gte what you want and end up happy with each other

Samantha Lucas
October 5th, 2008, 01:44 PM
Awwwww you're both so sweet!


But we're not getting married, primarily because I'm not getting gypped out of my honeymoon! LOL

Dale has suggested it more than once, and I'm like NO I want my honeymoon!! :hissyfit: I didn't get one the first time, I'm getting one this time even if I have to wait till I'm 80!

hollie
October 5th, 2008, 01:50 PM
I didn't get mine till last year after 12 years

Dani
October 5th, 2008, 02:12 PM
I'm sure he'll keep good on his promise to give you a honeymoon either way.

I just though about this and you're going to laugh when you read it, but my mom and dad had they're honeymoon at Disney. Now my mom and step-dad didn't have a honeymoon at all, so my mom did it backwards from you. Laugh it Up fuzball

Samantha Lucas
October 5th, 2008, 10:35 PM
Ok fine, I should have been more specific, coz I got one at six months the last time and it really was lovely. We went to San Diego and as I was working for Hilton at the time, we got a free room and were upgraded to one of their bungalows on the bay with a private patio. :)

But I guess I just want the honeymoon that immediately follows the wedding and I want it at Disney! ...call me spoiled but I want it! LOL

Of course I could totally change my mind by tomorrow, but for tonight, that's it! HMPH :P :roflmao:

Samantha Lucas
October 5th, 2008, 10:41 PM
GUESS WHAT! GUESS WHAT! GUESS WHAT!

I'm going to New York again, only this time, right into Manhattan!!!!

OMG I can not wait!!!!

We're in Jersey tonight, about to take a five hour nap before heading into Brooklyn to deliver by 8am.

I don't know why, but all my life I've wanted to see New York, and I may not see much, but I'm gonna see a bunch! Dale's been working on the route all night and he's got us going passed all this cool stuff and over bridges and through tunnels. (I like tunnels :D) Anyway, just had to tell someone, so y'all are the lucky ones!

WOOHOO!!!

:jump:

spiritworld23
October 5th, 2008, 11:21 PM
:omg_2:That sounds great.

GUESS WHAT! GUESS WHAT! GUESS WHAT!

I'm going to New York again, only this time, right into Manhattan!!!!

OMG I can not wait!!!!

We're in Jersey tonight, about to take a five hour nap before heading into Brooklyn to deliver by 8am.

I don't know why, but all my life I've wanted to see New York, and I may not see much, but I'm gonna see a bunch! Dale's been working on the route all night and he's got us going passed all this cool stuff and over bridges and through tunnels. (I like tunnels :D) Anyway, just had to tell someone, so y'all are the lucky ones!

WOOHOO!!!

:jump:

Dani
October 6th, 2008, 05:30 PM
Ok fine, I should have been more specific, coz I got one at six months the last time and it really was lovely. We went to San Diego and as I was working for Hilton at the time, we got a free room and were upgraded to one of their bungalows on the bay with a private patio. :)

But I guess I just want the honeymoon that immediately follows the wedding and I want it at Disney! ...call me spoiled but I want it! LOL

Of course I could totally change my mind by tomorrow, but for tonight, that's it! HMPH :P :roflmao:
You know you're not going to change your mind! Laugh it Up fuzball


GUESS WHAT! GUESS WHAT! GUESS WHAT!

I'm going to New York again, only this time, right into Manhattan!!!!

OMG I can not wait!!!!

We're in Jersey tonight, about to take a five hour nap before heading into Brooklyn to deliver by 8am.

I don't know why, but all my life I've wanted to see New York, and I may not see much, but I'm gonna see a bunch! Dale's been working on the route all night and he's got us going passed all this cool stuff and over bridges and through tunnels. (I like tunnels :D) Anyway, just had to tell someone, so y'all are the lucky ones!

WOOHOO!!!

:jump:
Excellent!! You have to tell us all about it when you get there. :biggrin:

Samantha Lucas
October 7th, 2008, 11:29 AM
Oh my god! Everything I said about Chicago a few weeks ago, I take back. That place has nothing on NYC!

Seriously, all the people on the planet live there, I've never seen so many people in my life and I've been to Disney on the 4th when they have an 80 thousand day!

We were there twice yesterday, we got to Brooklyn at 6 in the morning, we went through the Holland Tunnel (even though we apparently weren't supposed to) :oops: No commercial vehicles allowed, but the woman at the toll plaza said "But I don't see you right now." So off we went, do you know it costs 8 bucks to go through that tunnel?! The Lincoln tunnel, which we must have gone through a half dozen times, same thing, except they don't have a problem with commercial vehicles. :whistilin:

So anyway, back to my story, and you wonder why all my editors say I'm wordy! Laugh it Up fuzball

So we got to Brooklyn and delivered, but going into the city, it was still dark, what a beautiful view! So after delivering we tried to find some place to wait for our next load, we even went to a mall in Queens, but there's no freaking parking anywhere in that city!

So we came back out and headed for Jersey, I was a little disappointed, but to be honest, being there during morning rush hour had stressed me out so much, I was glad to leave.

So we're headed down the road to Jersey when we get a call, it's a mini load, which means less then 50 miles and you just get a straight 50 bucks for it plus you get to be #1 on the board when you're finished.

So we said sure and off we went to Jersey to pick up 18 cases of bottled water and deliver it to Mark (creator of Survivor and The Apprentice) Burnett at his offices in the Trump Tower.

That's when it happened...I got the breathtaking NYC skyline view as we headed back to the city. It was stunning. :notworthy:

Anyway then we went on to Trump Towers, do you know it's all one way streets donw there??!! OMG So it took us forever and with each street being about three lanes, two of which are taken up with parking, you get this claustraphobic feeling as buildings so tall the must touch the sky, crowd in on each side of you. I mean we kept loosing satelite signal to our Garmin because of it, and every street is lined like that with building after buidling, same as chicago, but the main difference was, Chicago was minscule in span compared to NY. The roads and buildings went on forever!

So we get to Trump Towers, had to circle thebuilding five times before we figured out where to park and delivered our water. Next to Trump is Tiffanys Oooooh Ahhhhhh, but OMG just up the street from the Trump Towers was the biggest freaking Disney Store I've seen in my life!

Two floors, Disney Characters, Princess story readings, craft stations, it was crazy!

We also saw Central Park, Park Ave, Broadway, The Empire State Building, The Russian Tea Room, Carnegie Hall, where the trade center used to stand (which was very sobering) and people...OMG did I mention the people???!!! :eek:

Seriously where the hell did they all come from? LOL I'm a people watcher though, and I found it fascinating to watch the people of NYC. You could definitely pick out the tourists, and some people (women) spend far too much money on clothing and hair care, but oooooh those same women had cute boots! Anyway, I think what I was most surprised by was how happy and comfortable these people seemed. I saw almost no one smoking or talking on cell phones, they were talking to each other, and laughing, walking dogs and I don't know, I guess I just expected a more serious group of people. Living in that city would stress the hell out of me! LOL

All in all, I loved my little jaunt to NYC, but I think I've taken it off my lists of places to vacation. I saw enough to say I was there. I'm good. :swinging:

And as a PS ...The taxi drivers there are INSANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hollie
October 7th, 2008, 12:16 PM
you had a good time then ??Laugh it Up fuzball

Samantha Lucas
October 7th, 2008, 08:42 PM
I really did! :D

Tonight we're in Buffalo, last night we were in PA, oooh! we went to Lake Eerie today and I got rocks!

I like rocks. :D

Anyway, it was totally cool, we were just driving down the turnpike and the lake appeared on our right waaaaaaay off in the distance, but it was HUGE and Dale just got off the hwy and said, lets go find it, then you can dip your toe in. LOL

He's the sweetest!

So that's what we did, we also went by a winery and found out why the Concord grape grows so well only in this region, but on no sleep, I'm not sure how much of it my brain took in. :p

All in all, we had a lovely day today, and we're first on the board to go out tomorrow. What an adventure this is. I'm so incredibly blessed. smilies/catmoon.gif

Ooooh and I had all you can eat spaghetti and meatballs for dinner tonight, their yummy! lol

spiritworld23
October 7th, 2008, 10:33 PM
Samatha,
I'm glad to see that your a cat lover too. :)

I'm sure that those orange cats are doing ok though. (Well it would be kats for me I just got a baby kitten Friday).
:lovekitty:

spiritworld23
October 7th, 2008, 10:46 PM
I think that it's wonderful that you have made a little place for you here, for others to read about your life. :)

This past September 3rd I will have been married two years. :biggrin: I'm very excited even though it seems that we have been married much longer than that.

So, to hear that you have found true love and happiness now is a big congradulations. Everyone deserves to be happy, no matter what they have been through.

I will have to read through your old posts to get up to speed, but I'm looking forward to it. :)

Good luck with the new series, I can't wait to read more about it. Happy writing.

So here's my thought, I'll start this running thread and try to post several times a week about the fascinating, scintillating, glamorous life of an author...namely me.

And if you're still with me and not rolling on the floor laughing like my kids were, we're all good! http://www.cobblestone-mainstreet.com/forums/images/smilies/newsmilies/rotf.gif:roflmao:

So what was the glamorous author (me http://www.cobblestone-mainstreet.com/forums/images/smilies/icon_wink.gif) doing today? Well, besides seetting up my new forum room here, Dale's been home since Friday, and it had been about three weeks since I'd seen him. Dale's my fiance for anyone who doesn't know, and he drives a cargo van for a living, so he's on the road about 3 weeks out of the month. :p But we carry on. lol

So we went to see Hitch Friday night in our local park. You know, picnics, movies under the stars, that kind of thing. It was wonderful! Then we spent much of Saturday watching Policeman vs Fireman on meta cafe...if you have no idea what I'm talking about, check out my blog (http://samanthalucas.com/blog) today, there's a youtube box and a link to the site. It's too funny!

I just love being with Dale so much, he makes me laugh like crazy. We don't even have to be doing anything, I just like being in the same space with him. Of course, best of all is I don't think I've ever felt so loved in all my life. It confounds me to be honest. I don't speak with most members of my family and outside of Kevin and Mark (my two best friends) I don't really have a ton of friends, I'm a bit of a recluse. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/redface.gif

So this leads up to last week's struggles. I was struggling with everything! Writing stuff, life stuff, kid stuff, house stuff. blech blech blech http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/tongue.gif So yeah, it was a week! To be fair, I do tend to over think everything, but I find that things sort of all come to a head all at the same time and it gets overwhelming, to say the least. As the new week has dawned, however, peace has resumed.

I struggle with guilt for ending my marriage, and compound that with the need to make my new life amazing so I can somehow justify my leaving, and it makes a VERY stressed Samantha. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/tongue.gif My friend Kevin told me last week that if I spent half the time I spend chasing my tail with "what ifs", writing instead, I'd have a fifty books out.

He had a point.

And it's not that I didn't already know that, but for some reason when he said it, it hit home and made me start thinking in a different direction. Then Dale comes home and I told him how I'm constantly fretting that he'll realize I'm sooooo not worth the effort and dump me. So anyway, serious conversation ensued and it went very well.

Hell, we even did a budget, and there wasn't one tense moment!!! No arguing, no hurt feelings, no anger, nothing! We were on the exact same page!!!

I've never had that experience in my life!

He did have one teeny issue that he wanted me to work on... I have a real need to constantly see it as my money and his money (primarily because he has soooooo much more of it than I do!) and he wants me to stop that. It's our money apparently. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif He trusts me and really truly loves me!! It's amazing.

I think it'll be a while before I've assimilated all that went on this weekend, but lets just say, I think I'm going into life with the intention of relaxing and enjoying it. How successful I'll be, who knows, but I'm going to try.

I did lose another 2.4 pounds last week, my second week officially on Weight Watchers. For more info on that you can check out my personal blog (http://samanthasinsights.blogspot.com/), I usually blog on Saturdays about weight coz that's the day I weigh in Blech :P But anyway, I'm psyched over that! Although with Dale home, we've eaten out and had drinks :eat: and I've over indulged at least once, but I'm not worried about it. I won't see him again for another month and I was somewhat careful with my choices. So if I've gained this week, I'm not giving up and I'm not hating myself for it. It's just back on track the second Dale walks out the door. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

In writing news, I'm VERY excited about a new series of books I'm working on now...and when I say series, well, I'm still in the initial stages of plotting, but the idea is to release a new book (about 50k) in this series every other month for at least two years!

What I'm hoping is to have people anxiously waiting for the next book in the series every month! I can not even begin to tell you how excited I am about this. It'll be something unlike anything else out there, so it's a gamble, but my heart is so deeply invested, I'm hoping it pays off!

Anyway, I guess that's it for now. Have a great rest of the week all...and RELAX!!! http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/smile.gif

spiritworld23
October 7th, 2008, 11:15 PM
Ok, the way that your talking about Sims, I want to buy the game and play....:omg_2:


It could have something to do with staying up until six in the morning two nights in a row, but whatever, I'm still tired! lol

And why did you stay up so late?

Writing? ...nope.

Trouble at home? ...nope

Insomnia? ...nope.

I was addictively playing The Sims2!

I don't let myself play that game very often, because when I do, it's like an alcoholic going on a bender! I don't come up for days!!!! The other day, you see, was just a long day of dead ends and by around ten o'clock or so, I decided to just call it a night, climb in bed, order take-out and knock up sims for the rest of the night...sim babies are SO cute... anwyay...

Good plan.

BUT

My sims had "other" plans!!!

First off, I decide I'm going to create a nice little couple, career focused, but with a bit of a playful side, put them in a house together from the start, turn off their aging and let them rise to the top levels of their career tracks, then start knocking her up till they've had a bagillion kids!

But when I went back in to create the guy, the sim generator gave me a second girl instead, and she was sooooooooooooo cute, I couldn't delete her. So I made her the first girl's sister, and decided they could all live in the same house together and decided for themselves who would pair up.

Not a bad plan, so off we go.

It was clear from the beginning that the business sim (Fern) was far more interested in her career as a professional dancer then she was in the guy. And the guy (Kieren) first entered the military, then became a musician, while Jaqui (the sister) became a home body, cleaning, cooking , making friends, and planting a garden. It was all lovely, until my cheat window refused to open and I couldn't turn off the aging!!! =O

So there they all are, aging away madly! and living their happy little sim lives. Eventually Jaqui and Kieren (yes with a small nudge from me, because they did nothing on their own!) started flirting, which led to kissing, which led to making out, which led to SEX!!! which led to a surprise proposal at the breakfast table one morning.

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

So all was good.

Until Jaqui became a little obsessed with her garden.

Dun dun dun...

All she cared about was her garden and she was spending more and more time out there until finally, one day, I looked up...AND SHE'D BECOME A PLANT SIM!!!!!

A walking breathing plant. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/rolleyes.gif

It was bad, so now all she needed was love (which she got from talking to her eggplants) water and sunlight to survive, unlike regular sims who had environmental needs, food needs, entertainment needs, and so on and so on.

So she continued on with her garden obsession, much to the distraughtness of her fiance and her sister.

Eventually they began trying interventions. The sister called the garden club because she knew they sold the potion to unplant yourself, but when the garden club woman arrived, all Jaqui did was request membership!

Then the sister, feeling bad for the fiance, started flirting with him, herself! Eventually they were caught in a romantic embrace and there was much slapping! Everyone was mad at everyone!!!

One day the fiance had had ENOUGH! He wanted his fiancee back. He wanted to get married and have children! So he called the garden club, intent on buying the potion himself and FORCING Jaqui to take it! But when they arrived, she refused to answer the door!

So he FUCKED Fern!!!!!

Who of course as a result ended up pregnant!!! http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif

They felt very guilty, but for the sake of their baby, decided to try and move on from Jaqui and see if they had a future together.

Meanwhile, Jaqui was in sunlight deprivation, but she kept trying to go take a shower! If she didn't get sunlight for a long period of time, she would pass out, maybe even DIE!

So I told her to go sit on the front lawn and watch the clouds for a bit.

It seemed peaceful. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/smile.gif

And I'm sure it was...

UNTIL THE METEOR FELL FROM THE SKY AND CRUSHED HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gifhttp://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gifhttp://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif

And then the grim reaper came, but since she'd been on such bad terms with her sister and fiance (whom she'd recently broken up with because she felt it was only right that he be with his baby, so he's all kinds of pissed with her, coz he still loved her and wanted to marry her) anyway, bad terms...the grim reaper REFUSED to listen to their pleas for mercy and took her!!!!!

OMG!!!!!

So now...

(and yes it was about this point in the story that Z --my oldest-- said, I'm leaving. I refuse to hear one more word about your desperate housesims. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif Can you believe that??!!)

Anyway, so Fern and Kieren can't stand to live in the house they'd shared lo these many years (plus they are a little worried what the pissed off ghost may do to them), so after the baby is born (a boy they named Julian) they move to a new house with the intention of making a life together work.

But once there, some new neighbors come to greet them and lo and behold if Kieren doesn't take one look at Gracie and fall head over heels in love at first sight with her!!!!!

So now he has a terrible dilemma. What does he do? Stay with the mother of his child, in a loveless marriage, or take a chance on happiness with Gracie?

OH THE HUMANITY!!!!!

So that's where my weekend has disappeared to so far and I swear, I have the least supportive kids on the planet. Z's always wanting to rain on my parade...sniffle, he's all, "You do realize these are sims right? They don't have free thought!

LOL sheesh! Obviously he's never played the game. Of course they do! lmao!!!


So anyway in other news, I'm in second round edits on Unatamable. I'm starting a new writing project tomorrow for a charity call. yay! And this week in weight loss...well, lets just call it a learning week.

And what did we learn?

You can't not drink water, and eat at steak houses and McDonalds and Chinese buffets and have alcoholic beverages and still lose weight! http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/eek.gif

I KNOW!

You must clearly be as shocked as I am!!!

Ok fine, so I blew it this week, but Dale was home!

And yes that was whining you heard. http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

Anyway, the sound you hear now is me, dusting myself off and starting fresh this week. And next time Dale comes home, I need a better plan than, "go hog wild!" sheesh. :P

Ok off to play more sims, I'm taking the weekend off!! What a concept. lol

Have a fabulous week everyone! http://www.liquidsilverbooks.com/forums/images/smilies/biggrin.gif ~ Samantha

spiritworld23
October 7th, 2008, 11:23 PM
That cover looks great. :)

Late last night I got my latest cover and I'm thrilled!

It's the work of Croco, who I still think is a complete cover art genius and I can't thank her enough for this one.

This is for my latest Cobblestone Press release. There's no release date yet, but I'll keep y'all posted. ;-)


http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Cover%20Art/Large%20Uniform%20Covers/legacyoffear_150x225.jpg

spiritworld23
October 8th, 2008, 12:10 AM
Your doing great. :)


Awwww thank you so much Megan. Some people say I shouldn't share as much as I do, but that's just me. I'm pretty much an open book and I've always said, you just never know who you're going to touch in some way by something you've written...even if it's just a mundane life blog. lol

I have to admit, this last time when it was just Dale and I was so much more fun than when we take all the kids. lol I mean, that's a fun family thing and all, but it's just so much more romantic to sit holding hands under the stars, watching a movie. I think I prefer something more interactive when we've got the kids. :D

spiritworld23
October 8th, 2008, 12:32 AM
Aww, are yalls kids that bad during the summer lol?:biggrin:
But, how sweet they are at times.

I have to rub it in...

Mine goes back tomorrow!!! :clap:

Bouncy Icon SmilieWooHoo! Yippie! Thank the Lord! Where's the tequilla? Laugh it Up fuzball

Can you tell it's been a long summer at my house? :whistling:

hollie
October 8th, 2008, 05:19 AM
I'm glad your having fun

My middle boy like rocks as well I've never worked out why but i keep getting him more

Samantha Lucas
October 8th, 2008, 08:28 AM
Awwww Jamie, you are SO sweet!

Thank you, both for reading and commenting! Congratulations on your upcoming anniversary. I can't say I was unhappy in my first marriage, not until the last few years I guess, but I am so much more happy with Dale. In fact, many days I wonder how I never knew a person could even be this happy!

...and you should definitely get the sims. LOL I'm dying to start a new game, but I've promised myself to finish this charity sub I'm working on first. (I need to have it in by the end of the month and I'm only a little over a quarter of the way through ugh)

Dale always laughs at me, coz every time I start a fresh game I say stuff like "Ok, this time, no one's getting pregnant", and five minutes into the game, I've changed to, "oooh I think I'll knock her up with that guy!" LMAO My games do tend to take on a life of their own.

Samantha Lucas
October 8th, 2008, 08:51 AM
That's right, today is the day my BABY turns 18!

OMG how is that possible, that means I can't tell him No ever again!!! :eek:

Okay, so I can tell him, but he doesn't legally have to listen to me anymore! I'm just lucky he loves and respects me so much. FunnyTongueSmilie

He's a good kid actually and we do have a really great relationship, despite my current whining about not being missed. Still, I was laying in bed last night thinking about it. He can move out, he can go wherever he wants and he doesn't even have to tell me....SOMEONE NEEDS TO CHANGE THESE RULES!!!!! :realmad:

It's just a very surreal experience, because I still have such vivid moments from the first days, weeks, months and years of his life. :itsaboy:I remember getting his nursery ready. I remember the first day I took him to Disneyland. I remember him in diapers playing a video game :right:. I remember him carting around a stuffed tiger as if it were a baby, it had to be bottle fed and everything. I remember him learning to swim and having birthday parties and now he's driving!

Sometimes I can't believe the man I live with is that same baby who used to snuggle up in my lap and watch Winnie the Pooh with me. I miss that little baby, but I'm so proud of the man he's becoming. Bouncy Icon Smilie

I feel fortunate to have home schooled him, because I think that is a huge part of why we're so close. That's my favorite part of home schooling really, the opportunities presented to build relationships with your kids that last through everything.

I'm sad not to be with him today, and I'm so sorry for the dents I've put in him along the path of life. I hope he's able to find healing for all the stupid things his dad and I did, and I hope he can and will continue seeking God and truth. I love that he's the kind of kid who looks out for the younger more helpless people out there. I love that he's brave. I even love his sense of humor regardless that I find myself the center of it so often. HMPH :tt2:

I'm proud of him, I miss him, I love him, and I wish him an exceptionally happy birthday. :hapbirth:

Dani
October 8th, 2008, 06:51 PM
Aww, are yalls kids that bad during the summer lol?:biggrin:
But, how sweet they are at times.
Yes, Jamie, he is. LOL! He's got an autistic disorder, so he can be more of a pain sometimes than most kids. Don't get me wrong, I love him to death and wouldn't change him for the world, but he is a pain. Laugh it Up fuzball


That's right, today is the day my BABY turns 18!

OMG how is that possible, that means I can't tell him No ever again!!! :eek:

Okay, so I can tell him, but he doesn't legally have to listen to me anymore! I'm just lucky he loves and respects me so much. FunnyTongueSmilie

He's a good kid actually and we do have a really great relationship, despite my current whining about not being missed. Still, I was laying in bed last night thinking about it. He can move out, he can go wherever he wants and he doesn't even have to tell me....SOMEONE NEEDS TO CHANGE THESE RULES!!!!! :realmad:
Awwwwww, how sweet! Happy birthday to your baby!! :huepfen017:

They will never change the rules no matter how hard we try to make it happen. I'm sure though that he'll still listen to you though, even though it doesn't seem like it. LOL!

hollie
October 9th, 2008, 06:06 AM
Aww, are yalls kids that bad during the summer lol?:biggrin:
But, how sweet they are at times.

I have 4 and 1 of them is usually upto some thing they shouldn't be but a teenage girl and 3 boys i'm asking for trouble most of the time and the yongest has development problems so he's often a hand full when hes being good


That's right, today is the day my BABY turns 18!

OMG how is that possible, that means I can't tell him No ever again!!! :eek:

Okay, so I can tell him, but he doesn't legally have to listen to me anymore! I'm just lucky he loves and respects me so much. FunnyTongueSmilie

He's a good kid actually and we do have a really great relationship, despite my current whining about not being missed. Still, I was laying in bed last night thinking about it. He can move out, he can go wherever he wants and he doesn't even have to tell me....SOMEONE NEEDS TO CHANGE THESE RULES!!!!! :realmad:
Happy Brithday to your son and I agree they need to change the rules my daughter can walk away at 16 and there is nothing I can do it will be different with the boys because they are changing the rules and they wont leave school as young. But Jojo can leave school and move out at 16.

Samantha Lucas
October 10th, 2008, 11:07 AM
But Jojo can leave school and move out at 16.


16!!!! :jawdrop:

What the hell!

Thing is, I know realistically he's not going anywhere, probably for a lot longer than I'd like lol but just the thought he could, is so weird. Then of course he read my blog, so he keeps calling me and saying stuff, like "I'm going down to join the army today." "I'm moving to Venezuela." I'm going out trolling for hookers." :helpsmilie:

OMG I've created a monster!

hollie
October 10th, 2008, 11:30 AM
16!!!! :jawdrop:

What the hell!


Yeh and shes 14 in Jan it get scaryer ever year

Dani
October 10th, 2008, 08:00 PM
16!!!! :jawdrop:

What the hell!

Thing is, I know realistically he's not going anywhere, probably for a lot longer than I'd like lol but just the thought he could, is so weird. Then of course he read my blog, so he keeps calling me and saying stuff, like "I'm going down to join the army today." "I'm moving to Venezuela." I'm going out trolling for hookers." :helpsmilie:

OMG I've created a monster!
You're the one that gave him the ammo with what you posted. At least you know he's reading and he cares enough to give you a fright. LOL!

Samantha Lucas
October 10th, 2008, 08:42 PM
You're the one that gave him the ammo with what you posted. At least you know he's reading and he cares enough to give you a fright. LOL!

Oh believe me I know. The kid is too dang good at turning my own words into his comic routine of the moment!

Dani
October 10th, 2008, 08:46 PM
Oh believe me I know. The kid is too dang good at turning my own words into his comic routine of the moment!
Yeah, I can understand that, but at least you know he's keeping track of you. That would make me feel good!

Samantha Lucas
October 12th, 2008, 04:53 AM
I saw my kids tonight. They say they're fine, but I found out some things about their dad's place that are making me crazy. Dale and I can't see eye to eye on where to place a home on the priority list, and I'm frozen solid!

I've hit a wall this time and I'm not sure which way to go. I hate the choices I'm left with and honestly, I'm kinda scared where my life may be heading. :(

hollie
October 12th, 2008, 06:06 AM
You may not be 100% happy with where they are if you were happy with their father you would still be there. They are healthy and happy and if you don't get a soild base beneith you things could fall apart again in the future.

Dani
October 13th, 2008, 12:06 AM
I hope things get better for you soon with the house and kids situation. It may seem hard now, but it will get better once you can get things under control.

Samantha Lucas
October 13th, 2008, 06:41 PM
You may not be 100% happy with where they are if you were happy with their father you would still be there. They are healthy and happy and if you don't get a soild base beneith you things could fall apart again in the future.


OMG you're channeling Dale!!!!! :wideeyed:

Actually that makes me feel better, because it makes me see, Dale's not trying to just be a caveman here, he's truly looking out for our future. Thank you:notworthy:

Samantha Lucas
October 13th, 2008, 06:43 PM
Things out here have been incredibly busy, which is good moneywise, but I've been getting sort of dragged along and that's not good. I think, however, I'm starting to get my footing out here. Gee and it only took me a month. :P

I saw the kids Saturday night, oh my goodness I miss them! But I'm also so proud of them, they are very much rising to a situation neither are happy with. Z was telling me how his dad gave him grocery money and let him shop on his own and he was telling me what all he got...I was SO impressed! He got vegetables! Ham and bread for sandwiches, potatoes, nothing on the list was sugar ridden! OMG he's growing up!!!!!!

My youngest, I was asking him how he was hanging in, and he shrugged and gave me a grunt and I asked him if he needed me to come home, he said "Nope, I can hang in a little longer so long as we get someplace nice when you get back, this place is a dump!"


http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/blink/blink-1.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/blink/?action=view&current=blink-1.gif)



http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/laughing/smilie_happy_251.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/laughing/?action=view&current=smilie_happy_251.gif)


So that was that. LMAO

Dale and I think we can get a place by mid November so long as the loads hold. It's funny we've talked to a bunch of drivers out here, and they all say the same thing, June and July about killed everyone! Financially speaking, which has relieved Dale, because he wasn't sure if it was just his company or everyone. Those two months were not kind, we barely had grocery money let alone living expenses and that was when we started to fall behind on everything, but hopefully we'll come back stronger. :D

I've made a rather big decision, something I've researched and wanted to do since I was sixteen. I've decided to set my life up so that I will qualify to become a foster parent. I'm one of those people who always tries to find the good in everything, this would be the good that comes from all the pain my family has brought me because I can use that to relate to a child who's feeling abandoned and displaced in a way that most people probably can't. :) Plus I always wanted a bigger family, but at 42, with 4 miscarriages behind me, it's not likely. At the same time, I still have this need to nurture a child and this seems like a wonderful way, to give back, fill that whole in my own heart and make what I hope will be a wonderful difference in the life of a child who's in need.

Dale and I have been talking about it A LOT since I've been out here with him and I talked to the boys about it this past weekend, and they both said so long as it's not a boy, they're on board. lol Dale's excited about the idea, of course with his job situation being what it is, he won't get to take part that much, not at first anyway, but, it's a long road ahead before we actually get accepted and placed, and who knows what life will look like by then! After all, our long term goal is to get him off the road, but at the same time, we have to play the cards we're currently holding and I'm trying to accept that.

http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/mad/hissy.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/mad/?action=view&current=hissy.gif)


As I said, I'm starting to get more accustomed to being out here, I've even started a routine for myself and am about halfway through a new book! I'm very excited about that, because if I can really hunker down, I can turn in another three or four before I come home, which would be fabulous since I've lost so much momentum this year.

One last thing, I've defined love (for me) it's a dog. :)

http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/puppy-wag-animated.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/?action=view&current=puppy-wag-animated.gif)



Not a real one, but Dale's offered to get me a puppy a few times in an attempt to make my life out here more bearable, but he really dislikes dogs. He offers anyway, coz my happiness is more important to him than his own...he loves me. I in return have refused him every time, because I know he'd be miserable and his happiness is more important than my own.

It's like the gift of the magi where she sold her hair to get him a chain for his pocket watch and he sold his pocket watch to buy her combs for her hair....it's love! http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/love/dancing-2.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/love/?action=view&current=dancing-2.gif)

And this relationship is more adult than my last relationship, no offense, but I always felt as if I had three kids rather than a partner and two kids. I didn't realize what a real partner felt like. I think I'm beginning to get it. :)

The other night, Dale and I really hit a wall. He wanted to pay off all out bills before getting a place, and that looked like 6-10 months...I about died.


http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/4.gif (http://s135.photobucket.com/albums/q150/samanthalucas/Animated/smilies/?action=view&current=4.gif)


And the problem came when Dale just would not budge, no matter how I tried to explain how important having a home was to me. Not something big and elaborate, I just want cozy, sweet, with garden and a nice kitchen...anyway, and as much as I saw his point, my emotions were engaged and I knew in my gut, I'd never make it six months without my kids and in a van.

So we had to hash this all out and it was NOT fun at all!

In fact, I honestly thought it was over, but Dale really showed me his commitment to me and our relationship. Truthfully, I sort of felt ashamed that I didn't have the same level of commitment. I realized, I'm still sort of waiting for him to dump me I guess and so still have walls up.

Yippee, something new to work on. :P

Anyway, back to the working it out part...

With my ex, anytime we reached an impasse, he always agreed to anything I said or wanted, then did whatever he wanted. grrrrrrr

But this process with Dale was completely different and it was sink or swim time, nothing to lose, so I jumped in with both feet and was incredibly honest about my feelings. Dale's reaction to it and acceptance of me, was astounding. Being out here, I'm learning about Dale, about what a real relationship is, and how to be an adult and a partner in a relationship. Plus since I have HUGE trust issues, I'm finding that this situation puts me in a place where I absolutely have to trust Dale, where back in my comfort zone, I don't think I would have risked it.

So now all this trust is growing between us and that leads to such a deep, intimate connection. This is what love and marriage is...Sorry, I'm babbling, it's just this relationship just feels so much more real and healthy and stable than I ever realized one could be...it scares me at times, but mostly it just makes me really happy and really grateful.

Well, that's about it, we're in North Carolina tonight, I'm sort of hoping for a load south, then maybe I can stop by and see my friend Kevin! The Disney World thing, I'd have to really think about it at this point though, coz I know it would mean no home for Thanksgiving. :( So we'll see, I'm not worrying about it till it happens.

Anyway, have a great week and thanks for checking in to my world of insanity. ~ Samantha

hollie
October 14th, 2008, 06:06 AM
OMG you're channeling Dale!!!!! :wideeyed:

Actually that makes me feel better, because it makes me see, Dale's not trying to just be a caveman here, he's truly looking out for our future. Thank you:notworthy:

The future is inportant we used to live day to day borrowing here to pay this and not saving because we had to pay things. We have now spent the last 5 years paying of all our bills. slowly we have managed it at first it was hard we had to increase what we paid on one loan. then when that was paid we used the money we where no longer paying to pay more on anouther bill. it has taken a long time and it has only been small increases in each payment. but fingers crossed we will be clear by the middle of next year and we have managed to save enough that we can pay for christmas with out having to borrow from any where.

trust is the most biggest part of a relationship. without it there is no realtionship it's just two people living together. I whine and complain about The Smurf but I trust him to death.

Samantha Lucas
October 14th, 2008, 10:49 AM
I agree with everything you said. I remember when I realized I didn't trust my ex any more. I remember the moment when I just knew that even if he believed himself when he'd make some promise, I didn't anymore and I remember wondering where can you go from there. It was like every word out of his mouth was nothing. It was one of the saddest moments of my life.

I must say good for you on the money stuff. I know how hard it is to pull yourself out of a hole, and how good it feels to get there! Dale and I just needed to find the balance in our priorities, I think we did that, although there's still a few minor unresolved areas, but we're working on those too. :)

This entire year has been very challenging for me, with everything being new and me still being VERY skittish from leaving my husband, but this last blow just seemed particularly cruel.

I really want to be a whiny brat and say I hate it, I hate being out here, I hate everything and it's so unfair, but I can't. Life's not fair, people can be really mean and stupid and impact your life in ways that are definitely "not fair" but we all get bad hands occasionally. And to be honest, this life on the road thing really isn't so bad when I'm not worrying about my boys.

Dale and I laugh so much together, it's the most incredible thing and I honestly do trust him, and that's been one of the biggest gifts of the road so far. OMG when I finally do get settled in a new place I can't even begin to express how much I'll miss him. He's so damn cute and wonderful, how'd I ever get so lucky?

I just have to get some big book contract and support him. LOL

You know what the weirdest part of all is though?

I think I may be becoming an adult through all this!

Go figure. :1eye:

Dani
October 14th, 2008, 11:24 PM
I'm telling you now that you just described my 3 yrs with my ex and his "promises". I just learned a little too late, but not that late (meaning that I had had the baby, but didn't marry him). At least I got out when I did because I can only imagine where I'd be now. It's scary to even think about. I mean I know I'm having a rough time now, but had I gotten married to him and ended up divorced it would have been so much worse.

Kudos to you on getting things in order in your life. Even though it took having this happen to you it's making you a much better person. I can tell because you seem happier in your messages. :)

Samantha Lucas
October 15th, 2008, 12:53 PM
Awwww thanks :)

I have to admit, it's brining out the bet in my boys too. They're having to step up and they are, which is pretty cool to see. I'm a mom, I baby them too much :P but they're showing some initiative and making some good choices about life, especially my oldest. He's SUCH a good kid...especially when he's not around me lol

hollie
October 15th, 2008, 02:09 PM
we did our 'becoming an adult' when our youngest was born 9 weeks early it took us a few years but we realised that after that nothing but health and happiness matters everything else is a bonus thats when we decided being in dept and worrying about money wasn't worth it so we changed everything. my kids don't have everything they want all the time but they are better for it. Jojo is nearly 14 and very mature for her age so it did alot of good all round

Samantha Lucas
October 17th, 2008, 06:56 PM
I think that's wonderful. Perspective is a very important thing. Most of my life, up until a few years ago, I've lived by the motto that if you wake up in the morning and everyone's healthy, then anything else is manageable.

I have to admit though, the divorce kicked my ass! Even though I initiated the separation, I'd never planned on a divorce. There are days I still reel thinking about all that's gone on in the past four years.

Life is what it is though and you can only do so much. I try and be a good person, help out where I can, but there are people out there that all they seem to want to do is cause trouble, and I have a really hard time accepting that.

Sorry grumbling, we were dealt a bad hand yesterday and I'm having a lot of trouble understanding it.

Anyway, thank you for your pov on life, I always find it fascinating to listen to other people's stories. ;)

Dani
October 17th, 2008, 10:02 PM
That sucks! I hope that things turn around for you soon. I hate to hear that things aren't going so good.

Samantha Lucas
October 18th, 2008, 06:56 PM
Over all things are fine. Good and bad like anyone's life, it's just (excuse me because I REALLY don't like talking bad about anyone, but I'm about to) Dale's ex is a mean vindictive woman. You'd think Dale left her, rather than the other way around. She's doing everything in her power to make him miserable and I just don't understand why.

He's given her everything, he's lost his kids, he doesn't even have a home now and she's still not satisfied, she's taking him back to court.

I just don't understand, and she's got the kids (they're 8 and 9) so wound up over the child support that on the rare occasion Dale gets to talk with them, all they want to know is if he's going to get caught up soon so he won't be in trouble and he can some see them.

I know there are two sides to every story, but I see the kids getting hurt here, and Dale's hurting, I feel completely helpless and it drives me mad.

I went through the same type situation as a kid when my own parents split, I just feel terrible for everyone. :(

Ok done now.

Samantha Lucas
October 19th, 2008, 07:06 PM
So we're in Michigan today, and it's bloody cold here!

We're going to head over to Indiana tonight to get the van worked on first thing in the morning so we stop burning so much fuel, that'll be a good thing. :) Then hopefully we'll be busy running all week. In general, the freight moves more up in this part of the country, I think it's coz of the auto plants up here, but I've heard the big 3 are all planning on moving their plants to Mexico over the next 3-5 years. That sucks! So many people depend on these places for their livelihood.

With the election getting closer, I'm noticing people seem to be almost holding their breath. It's almost as if no one is quite sure who to vote for because SO much is riding on this that they're afraid to make the wrong choice. It's strange.

Meeting people and seeing places I otherwise never would, is still the best part of being out here. I saw my boys last night, they're wonderful and I love them so much. :) Still haven't seen my cat though, and I'm really getting worried about her, I'm afraid she's going to think I abandoned her and she simply doesn't like anyone else enough to stick around.

Life is never easy.

I'm starting a new writing plan this week, I'm VERY excited about it. As the time is going by and I'm getting more accustomed to being out here, the writing is becoming easier and easier.

I think in general, the best lesson I'm poised to learn out here, is that if i just relax, things will be ok. :)

Hope you all have a great week! ! Samantha

Dani
October 19th, 2008, 11:30 PM
His wife sounds like so many of the women that I see and a couple I know. No one gets away from it either. Our family lawyer (before he passed away) had that problem with his ex wife and she left him too. It sucks that they have to be that way. Y'all will work through all this and things will get better.

Samantha Lucas
October 20th, 2008, 08:04 PM
I have an interesting perspective, because I've seen it from three sides. As a kid who's dad never paid, as a mom who doesn't get a dime, and as the fiancée of a man who's doing everything he can to pay the 800 a month he's been ordered to, to the point he has no home and can't ever actually see his kids.

I fully believe you need to take care of children you bring into this world, but this system is broken. It needs some serious fixing IMHO.

Dani
October 20th, 2008, 08:29 PM
I totally agree. I got basically nothing from my ex before, but he did sign over his rights to my son since he hated having to pay anything. I also had a dad that barely gave my mom anything. He'd give her $100 rolled up and pass it over my head so it looked to me like he was giving her a lot for me. Yeah right!! I learned really quick about that one.

Samantha Lucas
October 20th, 2008, 10:31 PM
It's just one of those situations where there are no easy answers because there are completely innocent kids involved, but when a woman tells you to your face, yeah we're living off your child support because (boyfriend) doesn't like to work, that's not right.

hollie
October 21st, 2008, 04:08 AM
I don't understand any of it i've never been in that situation fron any side. I do know that in this country if your situation changes you can ask the courts to change how much you pay. Dale now has you and 2 kids to support so they may reduce his payments and mostly they don't like it when dads can't see kids cos they have to work especially if they are a good person who could teach kids values

Samantha Lucas
October 21st, 2008, 11:07 AM
Well, the courts here don't seem to care if Dale sees them or not so long as he pays. And he was told his income would have to change by 20k before the court would make a difference to his payments. He makes only a little less now then he did when the court ruled, but his ex doesn't work at all so the courts determined the bulk of the support to be Dale's. He's even court ordered to pay for day care that the kids don't even go to coz mom doesn't work. It's ridiculous.

Part of the problem is, in the situation we're in, we can't even afford a lawyer to help us. Since she decided to file charges against him, Dale has to be in court on the 4th and she'll have a lawyer and he won't. We can't figure anything good coming from that, but we'll see.

Dani
October 21st, 2008, 02:32 PM
I have a few choice words to describe Dale's ex and they ain't pretty. The only ones I can say aloud are skank and trollop. Sorry, but I see too many of those kinds of women around here. Most of them live off welfare and then child support is used to buy their cigarettes and booze or to get their nails done and buy new clothes for them not their kids like it should be.

hollie
October 21st, 2008, 05:06 PM
I don't understand your legal system over here if you can't afford a lawer you can get legal aid and most of the places that do it are young and really good. I've been through the family courts over here when Robert's sister decided she wanted to see the kids and i said no (so did the court) and the judges listen to people. I'll prey for you both

Samantha Lucas
October 21st, 2008, 06:38 PM
I really do appreciate that Hollie, thing is she's on legal aid and they won't fight themselves. So Dale can't get it.

And I agree Dani. Makes me crazy cause I know if it weren't for the child support she's getting, she'd give Dale custody in a heartbeat. They're sweet kids and I worry about them, because I know she talks bad about Dale all the time, but you should see them (Dale and his boys)together, his kids adore him and he misses them sooooooo much. I wish there were easier answers, but we haven't come up with any good solution so far. :(

Samantha Lucas
October 23rd, 2008, 07:31 PM
I just met someone in a truckstop who knew who I was!!!!

FREAKY! lol

Dani
October 23rd, 2008, 07:33 PM
That is soooo cool!!!!! You're famous! :biggrin:

hollie
October 23rd, 2008, 07:37 PM
I really do appreciate that Hollie, thing is she's on legal aid and they won't fight themselves. So Dale can't get it.

see that wrong over here both parties can get legal aid you just have to use a different company everyone is entitled to legal representation. There should be a court lawyer on the day. look on the web i know there is a group for fathers over so there will be one over there it might not be easy but there is help out if you look and fight for it

Dani
October 23rd, 2008, 07:55 PM
I really do appreciate that Hollie, thing is she's on legal aid and they won't fight themselves. So Dale can't get it.

He should be able to get help from them too. I asked mom hypothetically about it using our situation and she said that legal aid will take both sides because there's more than one lawyer in the office. If you can't use the local office go to the next town's office. I don't think that they can legally turn him away.

hollie
October 23rd, 2008, 07:59 PM
He should be able to get help from them too. I asked mom hypothetically about it using our situation and she said that legal aid will take both sides because there's more than one lawyer in the office. If you can't use the local office go to the next town's office. I don't think that they can legally turn him away.

I think your right it goes against his civil rights and thats international not British

Samantha Lucas
October 23rd, 2008, 09:53 PM
I'll talk to him about it. The last time he checked was during the divorce and they said since they were representing her, they couldn't represent him.

She called this morning demanding he come home this weekend and take the kids coz she was having a nervous breakdown. When he told her he couldn't because she was taking him to court so he had to make up the child support, she hung up on him.

Then he called right back to see if he could talk to the kids, and she wouldn't answer the phone. Things need to come to a head one way or another. :(

Dani
October 23rd, 2008, 10:01 PM
They probably didn't want to have to deal with it or the lawyers were stupid, but he should look into it.

hollie
October 24th, 2008, 03:38 AM
if he contacts the court they will help a they can't both have the same company it's called a conflict of interest but there is more than one company. the court will have someone to ask even if it's the security guard he deals with them daily. I've been through it i know how hard it is only it wasn't money the b***h wanted my kids well the older 3 anyway she wasn't interested in Tpot

Dani
October 24th, 2008, 06:13 PM
That's sad Hollie!

Samantha Lucas
October 24th, 2008, 06:25 PM
That's terrible Hollie!

Stuff with our kids is always so gut wrenching, but to have someone try to take them...I can't imagine much worse. :(

hollie
October 25th, 2008, 06:38 AM
I was Rob's half sister and it ended up where she was told she could write to them but had to address the letter to us so we could look at what she wrote. She didn't even get permission to see them but it was a very difficult time. One good point was the court ordered a family review thing to be done and I have a lovely report about how well ballenced and secure my kids are.

One thing our soliciter said was to make sure she knew everything so she could tell the court. So if he can't get help make sure he tells about the phone calls and that he's worried about her coping but he can't help more becasue now he has extra responsiblitys he has to work a lot more and can't take the kids as often as he would like. and don't be scared of the judge they are people as well tell the whole story not just bits of it and be honest. tell the court that you are aiming to be in a possition to takeover custudy of the kids something that thier mother has indicated she wants more than once and ask for a court report of thier welfare. that way if you still can't get help you have an indipendent opinion and the people who do them arn't daft they don't talk to the kids with the mother there.

I asked my friends dad he's a magistriaght over here and as much as he doesn't know your exact laws as such he does know how a court room works.

Samantha Lucas
October 26th, 2008, 10:54 AM
Oh Hollie thank you SO much!

One of the huge things he has riding against him though, and the only reason he didn't get the kids originally, is her step-father's very well connected in the county. The judge on their case, even had the same last name!

When she left Dale originally, she snuck out on him in the middle of the night and claimed abuse, so Dale wasn't even allowed to be told where they'd gone. For two weeks he had no idea how his kids were or where they were. She'd even recently tried to commit suicide, and she still got custody, and not partial custody, no she got sole custody with Dale having visitations. As the order reads, he doesn't have any say in anything about the kids. She's signed the youngest into the kids mental hospital twice, simply because she can't handle him (he's ADD and has a lot of anxiety) and Dale can't even give input into his treatment.

It's such a bad situation, and I think Dale feels gutted and hopeless. :(

Samantha Lucas
October 26th, 2008, 11:29 AM
This was a very up and down week. On one hand, I'm making a lot of peace in myself. With who I am, choices I've made, where I want to be in the future, and even with my writing.

On the other hand, because I'm feeling more peace in myself, more grounded, it's making me want to go home. I want to settle in and start the rest of my life so to speak. Freight is down again and if I look solely at Dale's income, he can't afford to support two families, so I need to support myself and my kids, which I was doing last year, but my ex has stopped paying child support (and this was months and months ago, nothing to do with the current situation) and I've lost SO much momentum in the writing that my income has severely dipped.

So I find myself, out here, broke, no light on the horizon, because though I am writing again, I'm not able to write at the same pace I used to, so I don't expect to see a real change in my writing income for 6 months or so.

I have no home, so I can't say I'll just go wait table in the meantime...I just feel trapped, which makes me panicky and there begins the downward spiral. :P

I'm not whining...honestly. Just trying to figure my life out. I love Dale, he's the best man I've ever known, but I'm beginning to feel the only way I'll ever be with my kids again is to go my own way. That breaks my heart.

It just seems like a lose/lose choice and I don't know what to do, but I'm starting to incur debt being out here and that terrifies me. I've lived debt free for ten plus years, I don't want to go back to being at the mercy of creditors. I really don't see why life has to be so damn complicated. I feel like I must be doing it wrong or something. :P

Anyway, I'm feeling a bit melancholy today. The weekends do that to me, coz we get paid, it's never enough, then we sit. There are never any loads to move over the weekend. That's when I get antsy.

Dale took me to the Opry Mills Shopping Center last night. OMG what a place! To call it a mall, is like calling Disneyland a park. We ate at a place called Aquarium an underwater dining experience. :eat: WOOHOO was it! I don't like seafood, but they had a few other items, and the main draw was the ambiance. I DO like aquariums, and this was like eating inside one, or at the bottom of the ocean really. It was so amazing.

Then we had dessert at The Apple Barn which was adorable, and had the BEST apple cider and we ate pie and stack cake and made ourselves sick! :sick: LMAO

I got another 8k or so written, and a third of that polished to within an inch of it's life, in the current wip. I'm irritated with myself because it's coming along, just not as fast as I want it.

I sit and write about 2k in an hour session. Thing is, back home, I'd write the 2k, then go ponder in my garden, have breakfast with my kids, then go write another 2k. Then maybe play a game, do some house work, back to write another 2k...you get the picture, and by the end of the day, I'd have 10k or more written. That means I could finish an 80k story in about a week, polish it over another week, send it to my crit partner/proof reader make any suggested changes from that and when it was all said and done, sub a new ms every month.

Writing on the road, I'm getting that first session in, then I get antsy, distracted, I start thinking! :eek: and before I know it, I've wasted an entire day. :P:P:P:P

My whole life is stuck in one of those catch 22 thingees ...HOW DO I GET OUT???!!!

On top of all of it, I feel shameful for even worrying about it, coz I know in the grand scheme of things, I have nothing to complain about. I mean, we were in Chicago when the whole Jennifer Hudson thing broke. We got the amber alert on our driver's Qualcomm which made it all hit home so much and I don't mean to be ungrateful for all the blessings in my life. I honestly don't.

Oh well, sorry for the rather depressing update, I'll try and be cheerier next week, or maybe move the update to Wednesday. lol Mid week I'm usually feeling pretty good. :pinkjump:

Have a great week ~ Samantha

hollie
October 26th, 2008, 02:44 PM
next time you stop and it doesn't matter what town you are in ask a lawer about that because in this country if you even know a person or their family you CAN NOT be a judge in thier case it makes it an unfair case and is illegal there are very good reasons for this i will be very supprised if it is different in the US our legal systems are very similar it's the laws that differ and a court is supposed to be impartial question that but not in his home town that would make his life difficult if there is not time to do anything for court next month. I was a witness to a fight once and Ian wasn't allowed to hear the case because my name was on the paperwork and i didn't even have to go to court the guy was pleading guilty.

You could always fall back on the old 'telling the press' she took my kids and put the baby in a mental hosp cos she can't cope and the court allowed it because the judge is a friend of her daddy. the media would love it

Dani
October 27th, 2008, 04:33 PM
next time you stop and it doesn't matter what town you are in ask a lawer about that because in this country if you even know a person or their family you CAN NOT be a judge in thier case it makes it an unfair case and is illegal there are very good reasons for this i will be very supprised if it is different in the US our legal systems are very similar it's the laws that differ and a court is supposed to be impartial question that but not in his home town that would make his life difficult if there is not time to do anything for court next month. I was a witness to a fight once and Ian wasn't allowed to hear the case because my name was on the paperwork and i didn't even have to go to court the guy was pleading guilty.

You could always fall back on the old 'telling the press' she took my kids and put the baby in a mental hosp cos she can't cope and the court allowed it because the judge is a friend of her daddy. the media would love it
I think Hollie's right about it being illegal for a judge to try a case being close to a family. Tell me this, if her daddy is in with the courts, they why does she need to use legal aid as her lawyer? It makes no sense to me.

I could also see the press having a field day with info like that too.

hollie
October 27th, 2008, 04:37 PM
I hope it works out for you both Samantha

Samantha Lucas
October 28th, 2008, 01:25 AM
Well I would think so too, but that was his experience. He got fucked...pardon my language. :)

Maybe it's just the end of a few REALLY long days, but I'm wore out. I can't even think straight, plus I'm in a really bad mood right now, I just got done with my ex telling me who I am, and I realized he's not the only one. Do you have any idea how sick and tired I am of everyone I know telling me who I am?

OMG I want to run away to another country and never talk to anyone again. Seriously I spend waaaaay to much energy either trying to live down to other people's expectations of me, or feeling completely beaten down because I'm expected to live in the box of stupid, mean, doesn't give a damn about anyone but herself blonde.

I'm sooooooooooooo pissed off right now I can't even tell you.

ok THEN...we nearly died as some psycho truck driver tried to run us off the road...REPEATEDLY!!!! (seriously scary :P)

Sheesh I'm ready for a new week and it's only freaking Tuesday!

hollie
October 28th, 2008, 05:53 PM
i'm sorry sweetie things will get easier for you it's hard now but when you get a house it will start to get easier

Samantha Lucas
October 28th, 2008, 06:12 PM
I'm sorry about last night, I know, never post when you're pissed, but I did it anyway. :p

Things aren't bad, I mean big picture, I still consider myself blessed beyond belief. It's just like life is a really big puzzle, and I've somehow lost a couple pieces and I'm frustrated out of my mind trying to find them. :)

Anyway, the thing last night when we were nearly forced off the road was truly frightening, but we're headed for Missouri and a casino for some R & R ....much needed R & R then maybe we can regroup. :)

I so appreciate both yours and Dani's support, please don't think I don't. It means so much! Thank you!!!

hollie
October 28th, 2008, 06:33 PM
It's ok we know how bad stuff can get

Dani
October 28th, 2008, 07:26 PM
We totally understand about everything. It happens to all of us and sometimes you just have to vent about it. Trust me, been there, done that, bought the T-Shirt and will be on going around again many times to come.

On a happier note, I have a new kitten. He's about 6 months old and is a total momma's boy. He's definitely a little lover. I'll post a picture when I get them loaded on the PC. The other kitten we rescued about 3 months ago had to be given to the vet to try to find a one cat home for. He's a mean spirited cat and my others weren't getting along with him.

hollie
October 28th, 2008, 07:58 PM
we got new gerbils and called them Chip & Dale after the chipmonks just nobody tell Tpot that the chipmonks are boys cos the girbils are girls. I was more bothered about them all agreeing on names

Dani
October 28th, 2008, 08:11 PM
Laugh it Up fuzball That's funny! Would he want to change the names of them if he knew they were girls?

hollie
October 28th, 2008, 08:18 PM
probably he wouldn't like girls having boys names he doesn't deal well with things that don't fit in the right boxes

Dani
October 28th, 2008, 08:19 PM
Awwwww! He'd go nuts then.

hollie
October 28th, 2008, 08:20 PM
if i can get through a day or 2 i can then tell him it would be mean to change their names because they are used to them

Dani
October 28th, 2008, 08:24 PM
If it's any help, I know a girl named Dale, so that name wouldn't be so far off. LOL!

Samantha Lucas
October 29th, 2008, 11:28 AM
ok dani and Hollie, I friended you on mysapce under my new trying this on pen name. :D Or perhaps it's just my split personality disorder coming out. hmmmmm :wacko:

I'm keeping Samantha Lucas for my more character based, emotional, romances, and writing extremely hot sci-fi and pure escapist fantasy under the new name...if I go that direction. LOL

Dani
October 29th, 2008, 06:46 PM
Cool! I'll pop over there and accept it now. :biggrin:

I have a friend that writes under two different names for basically the same reasons.

hollie
October 30th, 2008, 11:22 AM
ok dani and Hollie, I friended you on mysapce under my new trying this on pen name. :D Or perhaps it's just my split personality disorder coming out. hmmmmm :wacko:

I'm keeping Samantha Lucas for my more character based, emotional, romances, and writing extremely hot sci-fi and pure escapist fantasy under the new name...if I go that direction. LOL

escapist fantasy that sounds like a wonderful idea can i come with you into this new world with you please

Samantha Lucas
October 30th, 2008, 11:57 AM
Definitely Hollie! :D

I'm still trying to deiced how much, if at all, I want to link the two names, but I do really like the idea of having the anonymity I don't have now. I think it will give me a lot more freedom to stretch to places I've held back before. We'll see, I'm getting ready to sub the first story under this name, and I've got three more story ideas behind that. lol

I've really been all over the place with my writing, because being published was new, and I wanted to try all sorts of different things. The new name, I'm going to stay real focused. I'm hoping to develop a long running series in the sci-fi, then do the shorter pure fantasy, fun stories too. That should keep me pretty busy. LOL

It's so weird, I've had this thought as long as I can remember, that my life would really start at 40, and omg I can't even tell you how much has changed and happened since then. Hopefully it'll just keep getting better. One thing I'm really learning, is to surrender to the hard times. If I surrender, and not kick and scream and fight them the whole way, I learn, and learning is always good. ;)

Samantha Lucas
October 31st, 2008, 01:15 PM
Okay, just a little ray of sunshine on my life:smilingsun:...and normally I don't share this kind of stuff, but...I just got my biggest royalty check EVER!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!


Makes me think I just might be able to make this writing thing work!
:jump: Bouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon Smilie:jump:

hollie
October 31st, 2008, 01:36 PM
you seem a might happy Laugh it Up fuzball

congratulations sweetie you deserve some good news

Dani
October 31st, 2008, 01:43 PM
Okay, just a little ray of sunshine on my life:smilingsun:...and normally I don't share this kind of stuff, but...I just got my biggest royalty check EVER!!!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!


Makes me think I just might be able to make this writing thing work!
:jump: Bouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon SmilieBouncy Icon Smilie:jump:
Congratulations!!! :huepfen017::huepfen017::huepfen017::huepfen017:

Samantha Lucas
October 31st, 2008, 04:55 PM
LOL Thank you and yes I'm just mildly enthused about it. :D

CharmedGirl
October 31st, 2008, 04:57 PM
Congratulations.

Samantha Lucas
October 31st, 2008, 04:58 PM
...copied from my blog at www.samanthalucas.com
http://samanthalucas.com/blog/uploaded_images/Happy-Halloween-720393.jpg (http://samanthalucas.com/blog/uploaded_images/Happy-Halloween-720471.jpg)

I LOVE Halloween. I think in all honesty, one of the hardest parts about making this, "living in the van" decisions, outside of my boys, was the time of year. From my birthday (sept 23) through to youngest's birthday (Jan 21) is my favorite time of the year. First there's my birthday, then oldest's (Oct 8) then Halloween (WHICH I LOVE LOVE LOVE) then Thanksgiving (my favorite holiday of the year) then our family celebrates Advent which goes from the fourth sunday before Christmas, through Christmas eve and I always find that to be such a special time of reflection and peace. Then of course you've got Christmas and New Year then Alec's Bday. So to know I'm going to miss all of it this year... ACK!

I just keep holding onto the fact that if I give myself this time, and at this point I'm thinking a full year, (till sept 2009) yes it's a year of my life, it's a year away from my kids, it's a year with no pets and no garden and blah blah blah, but honestly, I find myself at this crossroads in my life that looks to me like this...

Path one...go home, rent anything I can get, have my kids, wait tables, write when I can and still be waiting tables and just getting by at 80! Which terrifies me.

OR

Path two...stay in the van, give up the year, write my butt off, because I know the volume I need to be putting out to make it at what I'm doing, but quite possibly, I'll be making a very decent living this time next year, supporting myself on my royalties, no waiting tables, and really truly being able to enjoy my kids, my home, my garden, my pets, without constantly worrying how this month's rent will get paid, kid needs to go to dentist, or pet to vet. Life's freaking expensive!

That to me sounds like the harder, yet better road to travel and maybe it's because I live in this society of instant gratification, that I think I'm a horrible person for wanting to choose the harder, longer road, but I think it's the right one.

Indulge me another minute, I was watching Dancing with the stars, I have to watch on-line now so I usually just wait and watch the show and the results show in one sitting late Wednesday, anyway, I was watching the result show actually and they were doing this little skit, supposed to be funny, about how the stars needed to have the mind of an athlete, body, focus and emotions all training and strong. That hit me just the right way, because I realized, my emotions are my biggest stumbling lock all the time, and focus? Oh look! A butterfly!!!

Seriously!

So I've been thinking about this a lot since I watched it the other day, and if I can convince myself that this van thing is like training for some huge event (the Olympics or something) and put the blinders on and just go for it, I really think an amazing future lies ahead of me. :D

Oh, and I got my biggest single royalty check to date this week, I cried. Seriously, I did. LOL It just made me see, this is possible, I just have to stay strong and focused and I can do this.

The other thing, my kids, you all must know by now how much I HATE being away from them, that's an emotional response. If I use my mind, I know they aren't thrilled about their situation either, but the time with their dad is good for all three of them, Z is really having to step up and being away from my constant babying he is. He's really taking some huge steps for his own future, which I'm so proud over I could scream, and lastly, those two paths look like this for my kids...

Path one...get out of dad's back to "normal" life goes on as it always has, we've got no money, we play video games, we do school, blah blah blah

Path two...they see what hard work, sacrifice and dedication can bring you, and when I come back, with my feet solidly on the ground, they get a mom who's more consistent and stable and a home they can be comfortable in and a more solid foundation to go out into their own lives from.

Okay, I'll wind down now. lol
Dale goes to court Monday (case you missed it, his ex filed charges against him for being behind on child support :P) so as long as something HUGE (good or bad) doesn't happen then, it'll be back on the road, with a whole new focus and a whole new attitude so until then...

Enjoy your Halloween, whatever age you are!

hollie
October 31st, 2008, 06:07 PM
my youngest's birthday is 21st Jan as well Bouncy Icon Smilie

I agree I think you are making the right choice if i could have done everything in a year and got my feet under me like that i would have. it has taken me a lot longer than that.

Good luck on Monday I'll be praying for you both

Dani
October 31st, 2008, 06:19 PM
Good luck on Monday. I'll be praying for a good outcome.

I know you'll make the right decision for you and your kids whichever choice you make.

CharmedGirl
October 31st, 2008, 06:46 PM
Good luck for Monday. I hope everything goes well.

*fingers crossed for a good outcome*

Samantha Lucas
November 1st, 2008, 07:42 PM
Thank you all! Because I've got this bad feeling she's about to blindside him with something. :(

CharmedGirl
November 1st, 2008, 09:10 PM
Keep up the positive thoughts. I'm sure it'll all work out for good in the end.