Search:

Type: Posts; User: Rayne Hall

Page 1 of 4 1 2 3 4

Search: Search took 0.07 seconds.

  1. Replies
    1
    Views
    345

    Is anyone still waiting for feedback from the suspense seminar?

    I believe some people handed in their assignments late, near the end of the weekend when I was teaching the seminar. During the days that followed, I didn't have time to critique those submissions. I...
  2. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Joan, That last sentence is awesome: >The...

    Hi Joan,

    That last sentence is awesome: >The massive wood andmetal door slowly swung open to darkness.<

    >They could still hear the noises of the street. The horses whinnying. The creaking of...
  3. Replies
    15
    Views
    655

    Thanks for telling me. I'll go there. But it...

    Thanks for telling me. I'll go there. But it won't be tonight (It's past midnight here and I'm too tired to concentrate) or tomorrow (because my month-long seminar starts tomorrow and will need my...
  4. Replies
    15
    Views
    655

    Hi Jerry, I checked and found that you had...

    Hi Jerry,
    I checked and found that you had indeed posted an excerpt in the right folder but it wasn't about the assignment I'd set (unless was thick and missed something). I'm pasting it below so...
  5. Replies
    15
    Views
    655

    I don't remember your name (so many new names at...

    I don't remember your name (so many new names at once!) but I'll see if I can find it. Just a moment.
  6. Replies
    1
    Views
    345

    Have I missed anyone?

    It's 9.30 pm here and I plan to go to bed before long. However, I want to make sure I have responded to every assignment you sent.

    With the nestled threads, it's likely that I've missed someone....
  7. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Mairhi, You got the point of this...

    Hi Mairhi,

    You got the point of this assignment exactly. To make this stronger, I suggest using fewer words on describing her reactions, and indeed, cutting some of her reactions altogether. This...
  8. Replies
    5
    Views
    438

    Yes! And the class starts tomorrow. :-)...

    Yes! And the class starts tomorrow. :-) http://www.heartsthroughhistory.com/writing-scary-scenes/
    (After that, I won't teach this class again for several months)
  9. Replies
    5
    Views
    438

    "Writing Scary Scenes" - The e-book

    I've written a comprehensive book for authors "Writing Scary Scenes" about techniques for creating suspense, tension, apprehension, horror, terror and other fearful emotions in your readers. It's...
  10. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Kathy, >Her gaze swept from the house to...

    Hi Kathy,

    >Her gaze swept from the house to the large barn and on to the scattered outbuildings and corrals.<

    You can increase the immediacy here by letting Gypsy do this, not just her gaze....
  11. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi James, This works well. Everything seems...

    Hi James,

    This works well. Everything seems harmless and normal on the surface, yet by inserting this barrier you've planted a seed of disquiet in the reader's mind. That's good. :-)

    I like the...
  12. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Livia, Exciting stuff. You're using the...

    Hi Livia,

    Exciting stuff. You're using the technique of varying sentence lengths to great effect.

    Consider tightening. I believe your writing style will become be more dramatic and exciting if...
  13. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Laryssa, These are good sound effects - the...

    Hi Laryssa,
    These are good sound effects - the sharp click and the dull thud.

    I'm a bit confused, though. This is Alex's point of view, yes? If so, she wouldn't be focused on the sounds the case...
  14. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Colleen, This is good. You've grasped the...

    Hi Colleen,

    This is good. You've grasped the essence of the assignment perfectly.

    I like it that the door "waited" - this emphasises the psychological effect and hints that at the inevitable....
  15. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Tambra, This part here is the actual...

    Hi Tambra,
    This part here is the actual assignment:
    >He blew a soft puff of breath on the scanner plate, hidden on one of the stones embedded in the wall. One of the massive granite stones silently...
  16. Replies
    15
    Views
    655

    I think I may have been rather too effective at...

    I think I may have been rather too effective at promoting this seminar :-D
  17. Replies
    15
    Views
    655

    If you want to send in a second version, I may be...

    If you want to send in a second version, I may be able to critique it, depending on how many assignments arrive. If it slackens off, I may still be able to fit you in.
  18. Replies
    15
    Views
    655

    Be warned: In the month-long seminars, I make my...

    Be warned: In the month-long seminars, I make my students work! Some people like that. Some don't. :-D
  19. Replies
    15
    Views
    655

    :-D If there was the time, I'd happily give...

    :-D If there was the time, I'd happily give everyone a second round of red ink, even a third.
  20. Month-long seminar "Writing Scary Scenes" starts tomorrow

    "Writing Scary Scenes" - month-long seminar starts tomorrow
    I'm teaching a month-long class on "Writing Scary Scenes" in October.
    http://www.heartsthroughhistory.com/...-scary-scenes/

    You get 12...
  21. Oops. I think I've posted this in the wrong...

    Oops. I think I've posted this in the wrong place. Apologies.
  22. "Writing Scary Scenes" - month-long seminar starts tomorrow

    I'm teaching a month-long class on "Writing Scary Scenes" in October.
    http://www.heartsthroughhistory.com/writing-scary-scenes/

    You get 12 lessons with assignment and feedback (basicially, twelve...
  23. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Laryssa, The assignment is to write 10-250...

    Hi Laryssa,
    The assignment is to write 10-250 words about a character entering through a door on their way to danger. The instructions are in the ASSIGNMENTS folder.
    Rayne
  24. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi dsthorn62, Overall, this works. >He...

    Hi dsthorn62,

    Overall, this works.


    >He flung open the door and it crashed against the wall.<

    This sentence is excellent: Tight, vivid, fast-pace. Your choice of verbs (flung, crashed) is...
  25. Replies
    81
    Views
    2,739

    Hi Dawn, This an interesting use of the "door...

    Hi Dawn,

    This an interesting use of the "door effect" with the PoV's own reflection providing the psychological barrier. It think this works well.

    The writing style in this excerpt strikes me...
Results 1 to 25 of 80
Page 1 of 4 1 2 3 4