While I can see how this exercise lets a writer better comprehend the power of punctuation, I found an interesting thing happen when I rewrote this. Because of the assignment, I could not edit.
It felt great to retype this without slowing down so my mind could tear apart every sentence. That's been my biggest handicap for ages, rewriting instead of just getting the completed story out of my imagination and onto paper, however imperfect the results. I don't know where this revelation might lead, but I'm going to try and remember this experience.